The Save Button is Your Friend
by Transcendent Oddity
Summary: Living your life once is tough. Living it twice is a nightmare - but hey, at least this time someone turned on the help menu.
1. Always Read the Manual

Chapter 1: Always Read the Manual

**GAME OVER.**

"What the hell?"

Look up. Look down. Yup, nothing. Same exact grey scenery as the last dozen times I checked. I'm floating in a grey fog, with a pair of giant words bobbing in front of me.

"Really? This is the afterlife? Just a giant stretch of monotony? Dammit, I know I wasn't exactly the best person out there, but I'd figured that I'd at least avoid hell. Whatever, it's not like I have anything better to do than **Continue** -

**CONTINUE? **

**-YES **  
**-NO**

"Alright, seriously? Now the giant words are answering me. If I weren't dead, I'd think I was crazy. Then again...  
Right, so choices are to continue staring at nothing or do something else. Well, this is a hard one. **No**."

The world shifts, gray spiraling to black, colors bursting like a psychedelic firework exhibition, shapes pinwheeling around me until -

**MAIN MENU**

**-NEW GAME**  
**-**LOAD  
**-OPTIONS**  
**-**QUIT

"So. I finally die after a few decades of boredom, and my reward in the afterlife is...a video game. Lovely. Since load and quit seem to be inaccessible, might as take a look at the **Options."**

**OPTIONS**

**-HELP: OFF**  
**-MAP: OFF**  
**-CODEX: OFF**  
**-BACK**

"Well, someone up there must really hate me - let's see, **Help On**, **Map On**, **Codex On**. And now **Back**. And, with no other choices, **New Game**."  
There we go. More spinning lights, more - oh hey, I'm falling. Wait, what?

* * *

What do you do when a giant nine tailed fox decides to rampage towards your village? Well, if you happen to be a civilian, you pray on your knees and hope it doesn't kill you. On the other hand, if you happen to be a highly trained ninja, you throw little bits of pointy metal at it...and hope it doesn't kill you. Honestly, the first method is probably more effective. Or, if you happen to be a genius with a serious penchant for reality defying seals, you call on the almighty power of the God of Death and chop the beast in half, sealing one part into your dying body, and the other into your newborn, and now newly orphaned, son.

Hey, even a genius makes stupid decisions. I'd like to see you do better.

* * *

A baby's wails. A dead couple, locked in an embrace above it, blood gushing from a gaping wound in their chests. Shattered trees, scorched earth, cratered ground - this was the scene that faced the Professor, one of the most powerful ninjas in the world, former leader of one of the five great villages, and predecessor to the dead blond male. Words cannot express his grief, for today he has lost a loving wife, the village's brightest light, and many dozens of those that he saw as his children. He also -

"Oh you bastard, you left me with the goddamn paperwork."

Yes, well, people in their grief tend to say the strangest things. Regardless, while he may be a fascinating subject, the old man isn't our hero. Rather, we are concerned with the wailing child, whose cries seem to signify his awareness of his loss. Well, this case may be a little unique - after all, how often are 174 year old men stuck in their newborn body, forced to live out their life from the very beginning?


	2. So I Read the Manual - Now What?

Chapter 2: So I Read the Manual - Now What?

"Miss, are you sure you can carry all of those?" Concerned older male, trying hard not to look down.

"Don't worry mister! I'm plenty strong!" Hmm, a little hop, just enough to draw attention up top, and there we go. One extra wallet.

"If you say so...but let me at least carry your bags to the door." Poor sucker, might as well let him dream.

"Thanks! That's really nice of you!" Wink. Yup, works like a charm.

* * *

Poof.

"Okay, let's see what I got. This week's groceries, including assorted vegetables, dried chicken and emergency instant ramen. Oh, and a little extra money - actually, this guy's carrying more than I paid for all the food. Oh well, maybe he'll learn to be a little more cautious. Seriously, this is a village full of ninjas."

A voice is heard from a secluded alley. Why is there an alley in the middle of nowhere? Well it's a funny story, really. You see, the creators of the original city, being the First Hokage and his rival, Madara Uchiha, were undoubtedly great ninja. They were able to single handedly end large-scale battles with their sheer presence. On the other hand, since neither of them were exactly great engineers and they both wanted to build the city the way they thought best, there were some areas where the architecture was slightly, well, off. This resulted in a sewer system that was not actually aligned to the buildings above, and several roads that ended up going nowhere. Sometime during the Second Hokage's term, it was decided that city planning should be left to those who specialize in the field, and several of the more pressing problems were fixed, or at least glossed over. A new sewer system was constructed, and several of the useless roads were walled off. On the other hand, no one exactly got rid of the original sewer system, and as it wasn't in use, it was eventually forgotten. At the same time, since the original blueprints of the city were destroyed when the renovations were put into place, there was no record of the system even existing.

Luckily, a hundred year old Hokage with too much free time on his hands had discovered an unsealed entrance to these old parts of Konoha. Now that he was back in the past, this offered him a large area that no one else knew about and that he could use as he wished. Naturally, he turned the whole place into his house. Yes, that's right. Konoha's six-year-old jinchuuriki got himself a house that was just under a third of the size of the city proper.

* * *

I love my house. Well, technically, I love all fourteen of them, but since they're all connected, it works out. Currently, houses two through fourteen are being used as storage areas, but I'll make do with the others. So, let's just make sure I remember where everything is - number one has my twenty foot wide bed; number two has the kitchen and giant bathroom; number three is wall to ceiling with is used kunai, ditto for numbers four and five; six, seven, and eight have scavenged shuriken; nine has rope; ten has random tools that I might find useful; the rest are all handmade explosive tags. Thank you shadow clones.

Right, maybe I went a little overboard with those, but I had lots of extra hands and time to be filled. The paper was kind of expensive, though - it's a good thing I figured out how to make ink a few decades ago, or I'd be flat broke. Oh, right.

"**Menu.** **Character. Stats. **Okay, a few more points into **speed**, and some more into **control**. Dump the rest into **luck**."

Whoever set up this game did not design it with me in mind - doing actions over and over again increases my aptitude in that specific activity, and also gives me a fraction of a point that can be used to boost a specific character trait. The first time I figured that out, I had thousands of clones under Konoha refurbishing the sewers, and after realizing that I acquired a serious boost in my construction ability and also got a few hundred points to play with, I went and dumped them all in luck. Best decision I've made in years. It's a shame that the effect of a single point levels off the higher the stat gets, or I'd have taken over the world in about a week. Oh well.

* * *

The Third Hokage was a busy man. Being responsible for both the civilian and military populations of one of the largest cities in the world left precious little time for relaxation. Of course, the job did have its perks...

"You know, jonin are interesting things. They gain years of combat experience as a genin, leadership experience as a chunin, and after proving that they are the best of the best, they are rigorously tested for ascension into the jonin ranks. You agree so far?"

"..." Fidgeting. Oh, yes, they're getting nervous now.

"So when four of these highly trained, cold blooded killers are sent to follow one six year old child and retrieve a single item, one would think that it is a somewhat unnecessary waste of manpower, right?"

"..." Why, is that sweat? Yes it is! Shame on you, showing your fear so easily.

"Maybe I should just demote the lot of you and hire Naruto instead - he's clearly more capable than all of you put together."

"But Sir - "

"Oh, you have a complaint, Iruka? Let me see, you have four A-rank assassination missions completed, fourteen B-rank surveillance missions, and a number of tracking missions on top of that. To be honest, you're probably the best active tracker in the whole force."

"Thank you, si-"

"But! I ask you to find one, single, untrained child, and you - "

Crash. Tinkling glass, followed by a thud.

"Hey, old man, I heard you were looking for me!"

Dead silence. Four men's spines were ramrod stiff, and their faces were suspiciously blank. One aged man sunk his face into his palms on the surface of his wide wooden desk, mortified at what just happened. Finally, sitting on the back of one of the aforementioned jonin, one with a scar bisecting his face horizontally, was a blonde child wearing a pyramidal red hat with the symbol for fire on the front.

"Dammit Naruto! Stop taking my hat!"

* * *

**A/N: Sorry about the extreme lateness, but our college apps were a pain. It's nice to see that people enjoy the story, however. Thanks for reading!**


	3. No Such Thing as a Retired Ninja

For your average ninja, their career started at eight, when they would join their village's academy. After four years of a semi-standardized education, they would be tested and hopefully promoted to genin. After that is around four to five years as a genin, with a rare few being placed in four man squads with a jonin. Then, after a promotion to chunin, generally granted by their kage due to actions in the field, most ninja were content. The more ambitious would aim for a spot in ANBU, lasting no more than three to four years. Later would follow a rather unnoteworthy period, usually culminating in death around the age of forty. Here and there, great ninja would arrive that would reach that elite rank of jonin; these were much less common than the lower ranks - it is said you would have at least ten chunin for every jonin.

However, even amongst the elite were those who stood head and shoulders above the rest - known as prodigies, monsters, legends - they were the S-class. Notable examples are the First Hokage, who raised the forests of Fire Country in one week; Madara Uchiha, who was the ninja equivalent of the boogeyman; the Third Hokage, who had forgotten more than the entire Uchiha clan had ever copied; the Fourth Hokage, who broke the laws of time and space on a daily basis; Hanzo of the Salamander, who forged a new country and brought it to prominence single handedly; the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist, who were said to each be worth an army, etc. Out of all of these, the most powerful were not those who were in the prime of their life, but those who had left those days long behind them. Sarutobi, Hanzo, Madara - as their bodies lost their youthful vigor, they more than made up for it by sharpening their skills. And now, after a long winded explanation, we turn back to our protagonist, who just so happened to live as a ninja for seventeen decades, win four wars and lose two, and, even in the last days of his life had been undefeated for a century.

Whoever designed this game really did not intend for it to be played by an adult who was completely capable of working around the system.

* * *

"Welcome, class, to your first annual academy tournament! The winner will receive an automatic A on all assignments for the last year, so be sure you do your best. Remember, there are no restrictions on what you can use, but be sure to follow the directions from your teachers. Now, the this will be a free for all tournament, so try to make alliances and ...

* * *

Ah, a tournament. I don't remember this happening before, but it seems that this game does not mirror my past perfectly. Or, maybe I've just forgotten all the minor details in the last hundred years or so. Anyways, this seems somewhat unfair. Maybe I should blindfold myself and tie my hands behind my back. Still not enough. Hmm. I don't feel like losing on purpose, and I don't feel like beating on children. Well, on second thought...

**"Save."**

**GAME SAVED.**

And that takes care of that. Now, there are a couple chunin, two jonin, and a handful of ANBU. They should last me long enough for some reinforcements to arrive, so...

* * *

The ANBU watching the proceedings were expecting a slow day - they had all drawn the short stick that morning and had to babysit academy students to make sure that none of them were hurt badly. Poor babies. What they were not expecting was to engage the six year old kyuubi jinchuriki in an all out fight that had them scrambling to stay alive.

* * *

Duck under a kick. Sidestep, pivot and drive elbow into kidney. One down. Counter giant fireball with a wall of water. Slide between a pair of legs and kick up. Two down. Toss a few shuriken, catch a few kunai - there we go, wire trap set. Three, four, five, six down. Wow, the standards for ANBU sure have fallen.

I slide between two female members, one with a cat mask and the other with a bird, and tie their long hair into a bowtie. Skip to the next set, put them down with a kick to the kneecap and a basic illusion followed by my fist in his face. Now, on to the - ooh, now this is going to get interesting. Didn't think Itachi was in the area. Let's see, basic start with some shuriken, a giant ball of fire and an illusion. Quite predictable, ironically. Okay, so he knows I'm more skilled than I look, and he shoots a fire dragon. Wow, jumping to the big stuff, are we. Redirect with a wind dragon of my own, and while everybody's standing around in shock, setup conditions for something a little more impressive.

A little air manipulation, and here we go. A layer of warm and humid air near the ground, and start pushing the whole thing south. Cool the air at the top and force the currents west. Looks like he's starting to realize something's going on. Shame he doesn't really get it - that spread of flaming spheres just made my job easier. Establish the third layer of air between the two, leach moisture into the lower layer, create a cap over the hot air, and we're about ready. Drag the whole thing east, jerk the cap away and boom. Instant tornado. Eat your heart out, Sasuke; your pansy little Kirin has nothing on this. Eighty mile per hour winds, four hundred yards in diameter at the narrowest point, this is the weakest form of the first step of my ultimate technique, Fujin.

Oh yeah - thirty years behind a desk, six years in a child's body - I still got it. Hmm. Might as well end this now.

**"Load last save."**

* * *

A/N: I know we promised to get a chapter out sooner...but one of us ended up in the hospital. Oops?


	4. Just When Things Made Sense

**CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE COMPLETED THE ACADEMY!**

"And it only took me around six months this time around. Hell of an improvement, if you ask me. Anyways, that's genin at six, time to break some records."

**PROLOGUE COMPLETED!**  
**BASE STAT TOTALS CALCULATED.**  
**WORLD HISTORY DETERMINED**.

"Okay, that's not quite what I was expecting, but sure, why not."

**DIFFICULTY: EASY**

"So let me get this straight. After spending more time as a ninja than any ten ANBU combined, this is the **difficulty** they give me. Why, back in my day, I was considered a** legendary** -

**DIFFICULTY CHANGED TO LEGENDARY**

**GAME SAVED**

**MAP: UPDATED**  
**HISTORY: UPDATED**  
**SKILLS: UPDATED**  
**ENEMY DATA: UPDATED**  
**QUESTS: UPDATED**  
**POTENTIAL GAME ROUTES: UPDATED**  
**INVENTORY: DISABLED**  
**WORLD SAVES: DISABLED**  
**SAVE POINTS: ACTIVATED**  
**AUTOSAVE: DISABLED**  
**WORLD: RESET**

"Oh, come on. That was absolutely not on purpose! ...I really have to start watching what I say and how I say it."

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 14**  
**CONSTITUTION - 18**  
**DEXTERITY - 11**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 8**  
**WISDOM - 20**  
**CHARISMA - 25**  
**SPEED - 12**

"Well, those aren't unbalanced or anything - hey, what's with the intelligence score?"

**SKILLS:**

**NONE**

"I beg to differ!"

**RELATIONSHIPS:**

**NONE**

"Okay, that's going too far."

**CHARACTER SPECIALIZATION:**

**HEAVY ASSAULT (SIEGE)**

"Finally, something I can agree with. Oh come on, not this crap again!"

* * *

After the pinwheeling lights disappear and the ground stops falling, I look around. Yup, right where I started, with some random chunin, whose name I never even bothered to learn, announcing the team placements. Something is a little bit off about this, but I can't exactly place my finger on it. Okay, I see ten jonin in the room, and I know there's around thirty students, so that sounds about right. No hidden surprises, outside of the pair of ANBU in the corner, so there's no need to be on edge. Hmm. The first eight teams have been called, so I'm on one of the last two. Both of the remaining jonin are solid - well before my time, but I have a vague recollection of seeing them as a child. Thank you, secret Hokage-only memory enhancement techniques. Seriously, how else are we supposed to remember the personal details of every single ninja in the village? Ah, there goes one of them, so I guess I'm stuck with this guy. Looks like a rather physical fighter, not to many weapon pouches, and limited callouses on the inside of his fingers - must be primarily a taijutsu user. Well, that's not too bad, I guess. Might as well get my body into shape. I might be able to match ANBU and a young Itachi in terms of pure skill, but anyone stronger will be able to move before I can even react. Wait. I entered this term around halfway through, and all academy classes start with exactly enough students to divide into four man teams. Oh, crap.

"Uzumaki Naruto, as there are no teammates for you, and in light of your impressive performance on the Academy exam, further instructions will be waiting for you at the Hokage's tower. Report there promptly."

Will do. Odd, I don't remember this being an option in the past. It seems things are a little different from how I remember them.

* * *

Konoha, one of the five great ninja villages, had its own unique defense system. Every ninja who was issued a leaf marked headband also had their chakra signature sampled and fed to the great barrier that lay dormant over the city. In its passive state, the barrier just monitored any signal over a certain level that crossed its boundary; if an unknown signal was registered, an alert was sent to the monitoring station, where a team of chunin was on duty around the clock. In an emergency, the barrier could be raised, but this had not happened since the attack of the Kyuubi, which tore through it like tissue paper. At any rate, none of this is exactly important, except to establish that the designers of the "hidden" village weren't complete idiots. You know, the same people who put the building that housed the majority of the village's administrative positions right at the crossing of the two main roads, and then painted it bright red.

At any rate, our intrepid and somewhat befuddled hero trapes across town to his scheduled appointment at the big red target, and muddles over the changes in the world that he is living in whilst contemplating the ethics of changing the timeline for his own amusement - alright already, on with the story.

* * *

Right. I walk into the tower, and meet a rather uncooperative chunin, who seems unbelieving that the "young prodigy" was actually a six year old. Seriously, what was he expecting? It's not like there haven't been other ninja who were just as young. Granted, there were usually special circumstances, but hey, I'm just that awesome. Anyways, I get to the main desk and the world goes grayscale and everything stops. Joy.

**ASSIGNMENT CHOICES:**

**BUT WAIT, THERE'S...**  
**OUT OF THE FRYING PAN, INTO...**  
**I'LL MAKE YOU AN OFFER...**  
**FOOL ME ONCE...**  
**ARE WE THERE YET?**

"Yes, because these choices make complete sense. You know, I'll just pick something random, because that's worked out great for me so far. What the hell. **Are we there yet?**"

**"ARE WE THERE YET?" CHOSEN.**

**CONFIRMATION:**

**YES**  
**NO**

"And now you ask me.** Yes**, I'm sure."

Yep, here's the generic flash of light - a lot shorter this time - and a chunin hurries up to me.

"Uzumaki Naruto? As of now, you have officially been instated as a genin. Congratulations. You will report to jonin Uchiha Itachi every wednesday and friday for training. At other times, you will be allowed access to the mission office, but you are only allowed to take d-rank missions. Any questions? No? Then please, feel free to show yourself out."

Wait. I've been assigned to Itachi? What exactly is up with this part-time teacher bullshit. Where's the four man team? The daily training sessions? More importantly, where the hell is my 'head protector!

* * *

A/N: Well, this was faster than the last update, right? That's a good thing, right? You'll review now, right?


	5. World War Ninja

Damn. Going back to the academy netted me my forehead protector, but I also found out that I don't have the ability to **save** or **load** the game at will, which means little experiments like the fight against the ANBU earlier are out. On the other hand, the meaning of each stat was conveniently displayed in the **help** **window**. The ratio of **strength** to **intelligence** multiplied by the ratio of **constitution** to **wisdom** was chakra control, with a score of 1 being perfect control. The amount of chakra I had was simply the sum of the four stats. Handseals and the like were linked to **dexterity**, while **charisma** affected interpersonal interactions.

Stats were increased by performing an action linked to that stat - lifting heavy objects increased **strength**, studying improved **intelligence**, etc. A rather more annoying limitation was not being able to perform jutsu that I haven't learned in the game or that I don't understand perfectly. This, unfortunately, leaves me with the academy basics and a handful of others. I still haven't figured out what the **skills**, **relationships**, or **character** **specialization** sections mean, but I should have time to deal with those. There aren't really any major events that affect me for at least six years, so that leaves me with more than enough leeway to take things slow.

At any rate, today's Monday, so that leaves me with two days before I have to meet Itachi. Where was I supposed to meet him, anyways?

* * *

The First Great Ninja War was seen as marking the rise and complete dominance of the village system, as well as the creation of a delicate balance between five of the greatest villages. Konoha, the burning leaf, was the first major ninja village. Its strength lay in an incredible propensity towards elite shinobi who maintained some semblance of sanity - something that could not often be said for most other villages. It also had a reputation for softheartedness, something that was quickly erased when they were faced in battle. Next came Iwa, of the steadfast stone. Located in a country famed for its harshness, Iwa was renowned for two things - its incredible defensive techniques, and some of the most destructive bloodlines to ever be seen. After Iwa was Suna, the scouring sand, hidden in the fierce desert of Wind country. Their ninja were often not the greatest direct combat specialists, but in terms of espionage and assassinations, they were unparalleled. Kumo was formed shortly before the First War, and thus grew with a strong militaristic mindset. The most populous in terms of ninja, the enveloping cloud was aptly named - they outnumbered any two other villages. The final of the five, Kiri, was formed during the course of the war by splinter faction from the samurai country of Iron and remnants of smaller tribes. As such, the bloody mist was known for having both the greatest swordsmen in the world, as well as the most bloodlines of any ninja village.

The Second Great Ninja War stabilized the political landscape, and came a mere score of years after the First. Here, some of the world's legends came to prominence, such as the intense rivalry between the Third Hokage and the Third Tsuchikage, the rise of the Sannin, and the absolute dominance of Hanzo in the land of Rain. Several other legends were made during this was, but in terms of damage to the greater villages, the Second War was rather gentle - most of the fighting took place on the borders of the great countries. This was also the first war where samurai were pitted directly against ninja, and came out the losers - defensively, the samurai were unmatched, but they could make no headway against the unconventional tactics of the ninja.

It was the Third Great Ninja War that held the potential to be the war to end all wars - every single country was involved, and the fighting was everywhere, from unexplored forests to the heart of Konoha. The rate of attrition was so high that even children were being used to fight - most died horribly, but those that survived became ninja of the highest caliber, though many were warped by their experiences. It was this War that would become known as the changing of the guard - the older ninja, veterans of the First and Second Wars, stepped down to let a newer generation step forth. Amongst this new generation was the man who would become the Fourth Raikage - A, of the thunder god's armour. With him was his brother in name, Killer B, the current jinchuuriki of the Eight Tailed Ox. It was also in this War that all nine jinchuuriki were used in battle, resulting in large scale changes to parts of the landscape. This War would have ended the ninja world, except for one man who single handedly ended the War instead. Konoha's Yellow Flash, their Fourth Hokage - the man was the greatest master of seals in recorded history, the fastest recorded object ever, and held the unenviable position of having the highest kill count in living memory. Jonin were mere insects to him, and he could kill them by the dozens. As a matter of fact, he did. His Flying Thunder God technique, the specifics of which were lost with his death, made him the most dangerous thing to walk the world. He stood alone against armies, and won. He took on multiple S-rank ninja at the same time, and won. He faced down Kages in their own village, and won. He faced rampaging Jinchuuriki in their highest forms, and won. His crowning achievement, however, was combating the Kyuubi in all its glory when it was accompanied by an unidentified S-rank ninja. He did not win, but he did not lose - he sealed the nine tailed king of hell into a child, and passed on, knowing his village was safe. Such was his legend, that an unofficial rank was granted to him - SS-rank, or "flee on sight" - making him the only being to ever receive such a designation. When he fell, Konoha's military power was crippled, held together only by the reemergence of the God of Ninja, the aged Third Hokage, who at this time was better known as the Professor.

Now, Uchiha Itachi was not one of these illustrious ninja. Not yet, at any rate. Only fourteen years old, he had participated in the closing years of the Third Great Ninja War as a child, coming out physically unharmed, yet mentally scarred. He was a prodigy amongst prodigies - in some circles, he was seen as the second coming of the Yellow Flash. Granted, this was an exaggeration, but such was his potential. It is this ninja who will serve as an instructor to our hero - this could be the start of a beautiful relationship...

* * *

"Genin Uzumaki. You are five minutes late. Take this scroll. I will test you on the contents in two days. You are allowed to take as many d-ranks as you would wish from the mission office. Dismissed."

That...was not what I was expecting from Itachi. True, I hadn't exactly had much experience with him outside of the whole "I'm here for what you have in your body" thing, but still. That was just a little abrupt, I'd have to say. Must be something they teach the Uchiha at birth. Well, let's see what the scroll - are you kidding me? Tree walking? Who expects a six year old to be able to tree walk in two days? Especially when they have no help? This is either a test, to see if I know more than I let on, or to see whether I can ask people for help, or if I can admit my inadequacy, or...

Oh who am I kidding. He probably just expects that everyone is that good - after all, he is. Damn, I hate working with a genius.

* * *

A/N: Hopefully, this helps make up for the long delay earlier. Review...please? Also, we broke 5000 words. Yay! On to 10,000!


	6. Here's a Level, There's a Level

**Tree Walking: This technique allows for movement along solid surfaces. Chakra required: 1. Chakra control required: .1, 2.**

"Hmm. Sounds more or less reasonable. Let's see where I am again. **Stats**."

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 14**  
**CONSTITUTION - 18**  
**DEXTERITY - 11**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 8**  
**WISDOM - 20**  
**CHARISMA - 25**  
**SPEED - 12**

**CHAKRA - 60**  
**CHAKRA CONTROL - 1.6 **

"Well, that works out. Chakra control's better than I would have thought, and I'm not sure how much 60 chakra is, so I'll ignore that for now. Actually, I don't even know how much any of these numbers represent. Whatever. Now, how do I learn -"

**LEARN: TREE WALKING (SUPPORT)?**

**YES**  
**NO**

Wow. Convenient. All I do is hold a scroll in my hand and ask to learn it? What happens with techniques taught orally, then? I suppose I'll find out sooner or later.

"**Yes**."

**LEARNED: TREE WALKING. **  
**+50 EXP**

**ARE WE THERE YET? PART 1 COMPLETED.**  
**+50 EXP**

**LEVEL UP?**

**YES **  
**NO**

"Huh. no one ever told me about this. Well, obviously I'm going to say** yes**."

**LEVEL 2:**

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 14 (+ 2)**  
**CONSTITUTION - 18 (+2)**  
**DEXTERITY - 11 (+1)**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 8 (+1)**  
**WISDOM - 20 (+1)**  
**CHARISMA - 25 (+3)**  
**SPEED - 12 (+1)**

**SCAN UNLOCKED**  
**D - RANK MISSIONS UNLOCKED**

**SKILL POINTS - 1**

**AVAILABLE SKILLS:**

**BODY**  
**MIND**

Yay, missions. Well, that explains what skills are. Somewhat. Let's see, since I'm lacking in intelligence right now, might as well go with -

"**Mind**."

**SKILLS: MIND:**

**SIGHT**  
**WILL**  
**INTELLIGENCE**

"Huh. Let's stick with** intelligence**".

**SKILLS: MIND: INTELLIGENCE:**

**KNOWLEDGE IS POWER (0): +5 INT.**

"Alright, why not.** Knowledge is power**." Whoah, that's a rush. I actually feel smarter. Ugh - that means I was actually that stupid a while ago. Anyways, how much did one level change?

"**Stats**."

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 16**  
**CONSTITUTION - 20**  
**DEXTERITY - 12**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 14**  
**WISDOM - 21**  
**CHARISMA - 28**  
**SPEED - 13**

**CHAKRA - 71**  
**CHAKRA CONTROL - 1.1**

Well damn, my control just jumped through the roof. Very nice. Now, I wonder what d-ranks are available...

* * *

"Welcome to the mission room. Here, you can talk to different clerks and request missions up to b-rank, if you're qualified to take them. You can only take one mission at a time, and certain missions will have requirements that must be met. The reward for a mission depends on a number of things, including time till completion, number of people on the mission, and of course, rank. Any questions?"

"No, thank you." D-ranks, here I come. Hmm, the desk is way off in the corner there. Then again, since most of the mission amount to glorified community service anyways, it makes sense that they're no very popular.

"Hello, how may I help you?" What, no questions on where my team is? I guess word's gotten around already.

"I would like to take a **d-rank** -"

**D-RANKS MISSIONS AVAILABLE:**

**TORA, TORA, EVERYWHERE**  
**FENCING**  
**NEED A HAND?**  
**ONE FLEW OVER THE MOUNTAIN**  
**OOH, SHINY**

Okay, the Tora mission is out, for now anyways. Knowing what d-ranks normally are, I can guess what some of these are, but I can't be sure. Well, the last one probably has to do with finding or picking something up, so it should be a good place to start.

"**Ooh, shiny**."

**D-RANK: OOH, SHINY **

**SOME CHUNIN IN TRAINING GROUND 35 HAVE BEEN LAX IN PICKING UP AFTER THEMSELVES. FIND ALL OF THE LEFTOVER EQUIPMENT IN THE AREA AND REPORT BACK TO THE MISSION OFFICE.**

**REWARD:**  
**25 EXP**  
**10 EACH KUNAI, SHURIKEN**  
**20 FT OF HIGH TENSILE NINJA WIRE**  
**100 RYO**

Thats not bad. Not bad at all, actually, especially when compared to what I received originally. Well, of to go do some cleanup!

* * *

Alright, anything I said about these missions being better than before was utterly wrong. Seriously, it would have helped if I was told that the training field was still in use - the leftover equipment was pretty easy to see, but the team of genin standing around do not look very happy about being interrupted.

"Look, a newbie! Aww, are you lost, little kid?" No, you imbecile, I'm not lost. Really, you'd think anyone who could graduate this young could figure out where they are.

"No way, he's so cute! I want to tie him up and take him home!" Alright, green haired girl just officially twinged my peadophile senses. Get a grip lady, you look like you're almost three times my age.

"Ah, Rumi, Rito, weren't we looking for a sparring partner? I think we might as well show this little guy the ropes, huh?" Oh, look, it's a muscle bound thug. Guys, you're almost adults, and you're still genin - either you all really suck, or - nope, you guys just all suck. I, on the other hand, graduated at six, placing me a good deal ahead of you on the pecking order. Maybe I should be saying this stuff out loud. Nah, just get to work. Kids will be kids.

"Hey, Ori, the brat thinks he can just ignore us! Let's show him how to pay proper respect to his seniors." Oh god, how corny can you get. It's like they're reading lines from a low budget movie. Ooh, this looks like a high quality kunai. Alright, keeping that one. Next - holy shit! They're actually attacking? God, these guys are idiots.

* * *

The girl charges first, swinging wildly above my head as I ducks - looks like she's used to fighting taller opponents, and that's throwing her off. I, on the other hand, suffer from no such disadvantage, and slams the heel of my right foot into her chest, forcing her away.

"Hey, guys, let me just try something really fast, alright? Scan."

**RITO - GENIN, LVL 2, D-RANK**

**STRENGTH - 17**  
**CONSTITUTION - 15**  
**DEXTERITY - 15**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 6**  
**WISDOM - 5**  
**CHARISMA - 6**  
**SPEED - 10**

**CHAKRA - 43**  
**CHAKRA CONTROL - 8.5**

**RUMI - GENIN, LVL 2, D-RANK**

**STRENGTH - 3**  
**CONSTITUTION - 7**  
**DEXTERITY - 16**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 20**  
**WISDOM - 5**  
**CHARISMA - 4**  
**SPEED - 8**

**CHAKRA - 35**  
**CHAKRA CONTROL - .21**

**ORI - GENIN, LVL 3, D-RANK**

**STRENGTH - 18**  
**CONSTITUTION - 15**  
**DEXTERITY - 15**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 13**  
**WISDOM - 14**  
**CHARISMA - 12**  
**SPEED - 12**

**CHAKRA - 60**  
**CHAKRA CONTROL - 1.5**

Well, that's helpful. And somewhat worrying. If these numbers are what differentiate between ninja here, then I may have a problem.

"Eh, would you guys consider talking this over, maybe? No? Didn't think so. Great."

* * *

A/N: Review! Review! Revie - I think you all get it. Typed this up when taking meds for a fever, so it probably came out a little...off.


	7. Three on One is Unfair - For Them

"Shit!" A foot swept over my head as I dropped flat to my back to avoid a fist that flew at me. The girl, Rumi I think, had recovered already, and was making handseals that looked vaguely familiar. It's times like this that I wish I had the Old Man's encyclopedic knowledge, but I guess you can't get everything. Oh, damn, no I recognize it. It's a pretty basic genjutsu, on that makes the target's perception shift over a few inches. Roll and hop back up. Block Rito's wild swing, sidestep Ori's kick. Or not.

"Ha! You're not bad, kid, but you're totally overmatched here. Why don't you give up and just be our pet for a while? We promise we'll treat you reall nice."

I don't think so. Damn that kid hits hard - actually, they're both stronger than me, aren't they. Wow, a few points makes a huge difference. In that case, let's try something else.

"Hey you. Yes, you. Girl with the green hair."

"I have a name, brat! Call me big sister Rumi, or else you'll regret it!" Ah there we go - she's a genjutsu specialist, but she just closed to striking range. Grab her hand, twist the wrist slightly while pulling towards me; one broken wrist and a scream of pain, followed by a rattling gasp as the bases of my palms slam into her carotid and squeeze. One down, two to go.

**GENIN RUMI DEFEATED.**

**+25 EXP.**

Okay, now for the other two. Good news is they're still shocked over how fast I dropped their teammate, but bad news is they are at least ten years older than me, will all the increased reach and physical abilities that come with age. This is going to be fun.

"Hey girls, what are you standing around for? Waiting for your mothers to come save you from the big, bad six year old?" Ah, trash talk. It never get's old, even when dumbed down to a level that these idiots can understand.

"Kid, we were going easy on you till now, but we're going to hurt you. Sorry." And that was Ori, who just sped up beyond what my eyes can keep up with. Damn, he knows how to enhance his speed with chakra. Eh, he's not exactly experienced, which means he's got tunnel vision and is going to be coming from a place I can't see - directly behind me. Drop backwards into a handstand, curl up, and rocket my feet straight up. The crunching feeling as his jaw cracks and dislocates feels very,very good. That's two down.

**GENIN ORI DEFEATED.**

**+25 EXP.**

Huh, same amount of exp. Odd, I thought he was a level higher. It's a good thing that these genin have no idea what they're doing - odd, you'd think the jonin responsible for them would have trained them a bit better. The last one, Rito, is going through the handseals for a rather weak water technique, and he's painfully slow about it. Throw a kunai, ring end first, into the center of his forehead, and that makes it three for three. Not bad, considering the difference in both numbers and stats.

**GENIN RITO DEFEATED.**

**+25 EXP.**

Well, better get back to work cleaning this place up before these jokers wake up.

* * *

**CONGRATULATIONS. D-RANK: OOH, SHINY - COMPLETED.**

**+25 EXP**  
**+10 KUNAI**  
**+10 SHURIKEN**  
**+20 FT NINJA WIRE**  
**+100 RYO**

**LEVEL UP?**

**YES **  
**NO**

That's odd. I guess I level up with every hundred exp? Anyways, I'll have to do some experimenting with this.

"**Yes**."

**LEVEL 3:**

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 16 (+3)**  
**CONSTITUTION - 20 (+3)**  
**DEXTERITY - 12 (+2)**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 14 (+1)**  
**WISDOM - 21 (+1)**  
**CHARISMA - 28 (+3)**  
**SPEED - 13 (+1)**

**SKILL POINTS - 1**

**AVAILABLE SKILLS:**

**BODY**  
**MIND**

Well, my intelligence is still lower than I would like, honestly, so lets try and fix that.

"**Mind**."

**SKILLS: MIND:**

**SIGHT**  
**WILL**  
**INTELLIGENCE**

"Alright, **intelligence**".

**SKILLS: MIND: INTELLIGENCE:**

**KNOWLEDGE IS POWER (1/3): +5 INT.**

So only three levels to this one, then.

"Knowledge is power." Like before, I feel myself noticeably getting smarter. Just need to check my stats, and then I'm probably done for today. As easy as the fight was, compared to what it could have been, I still have a six year old body, and all the disadvantages that come with it.

"**Stats**."

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 19**  
**CONSTITUTION - 23**  
**DEXTERITY - 14**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 20**  
**WISDOM - 22**  
**CHARISMA -31**  
**SPEED - 14**

**CHAKRA - 84**

**CHAKRA CONTROL - 1**

**CONGRATULATIONS.**

**ADVANCED CHAKRA CONTROL EXERCISES UNLOCKED.**

Oh, come on. If it's not one thing, it's another. You know what, I'm going to sleep - this is getting ridiculous.

* * *

A/N: Alright, this isn't exactly our greatest work, and it's shorter than usual too - we blame not being able to write fight scenes and one of us coughing up blood day before yesterday.


	8. And All Around the Cobbler's Bench

Uchiha Itachi was not a child. He had not, in fact, been a child since the tender age of four, when he first decided that he would become a ninja. Granted, this decision was greatly influenced by his family, but even as a youth, barely more than a toddler, his will was unshakeable. It would only grow with him as he walked through blood drenched battlefields, and then again as he stood his ground against malice given form. Though even the Kyuubi was not enough to get him to flinch, the man in front of him made him feel like a child again.

"Itachi, when you became a genin eight years ago, I asked you a question. Do you remember what it was?"

"Sir, I have never forgotten a single thing you have told me. How could I? You are my Hokage, and your words are as absolute as a god's."

"Now, now, I wouldn't go quite that far. Have you an answer to that question yet?"

"No...not yet."

"No matter. Do you know why I wished to talk to you today?"

"About my student, correct."

The Hokage shuffles some papers on his desk, extracting a set and placing the rest aside. He lifts the first page and reads.

"Uzumaki Naruto. Started the academy at age six, graduated in six months, breaking all previous records. Total training in any kind of ninja arts, six months. Again, a new record has been set. Learned tree walking in around five minutes at age six, when most people can barely even grasp their chakra - a record that doesn't just break the old one, it obliterates it. Fights three genin simultaneously, though they are admittedly of low caliber, and wins - I don't think even you would try that so young. This, of course, is just his official record. Tell me, Itachi, what would you say we are dealing with?"

"He is unquestionably a prodigy, the likes of which come very rarely."

"If at all. A prodigy, hmm. Well, you may be right. Regardless, he will not fit a normal education. Test him."

"Yes, sir."

* * *

It's been two days - did a few d-ranks, leveled up a bit, explored what changed. Actually, it would probably be more accurate to say I saw what didn't change. Outside of the location of a few key buildings, like the Tower, the prison, and the Ramen Stand, everything changed at least slightly. Some just moved, while others are completely different. What hurts the most is the loss of my stockpiles. Well, I'm not actually sure about that. I have a faint suspicion that the storerooms have just been relocated, not banished. Extra exploring to do someday. Then again, I have six years before anything major happened. At least, I had six years. I have no idea what kind of effects my actions have on the timeline, and what else changing the difficulty did.

It doesn't really matter right now anyways. Time to head back to training ground 23 and show Itachi what I can do - I have a feeling that his views on punctuality are quite a bit different from Kakashi's.

* * *

"Genin Uzumaki, congratulations on learning the tree walking technique."

Considering I'm here an hour early, when the hell did he get here. Did he just wake up this morning and decide to stand in the middle of a field for hours?

"After discussion with the Hokage, it has been agreed that the previous decision to waive your final graduation test has been revoked. Certain parties are wary of allowing a child to take solo missions; In light of this development, I shall be conducting a test of your skills. Your objective is to strike me cleanly at least once in the next hour. I will be holding back. The test is limited to the area of this training ground. Begin."

Alright, why is it that every time that Itachi opens his mouth, I get screwed. Holding back? A fourteen year old ANBU captain against a six year old genin? What, is he going to chop his hands and feet off and then blind himself? Damn, I'm going to have to get serious with this - nearly all of my jutsu are lost, and the ones that I can use would bring too much suspicion on me. Well, unless I can get away with saying that I re-invented the rasengan based on descriptions from the Academy. Let's keep that as a last resort. Anyways, he's darted off, but not very far - I can just barely tell that he's in a tree that borders the open field.

I zero in on where Itachi seemed to be. I'm going to hit him whether he likes it or not. Dipping my hand into my side pouch, I throw one of my ten kunai in a parabolic arc towards him. He shoots out from the tree faster than I can see, but that's okay, I didn't intend for that to hit him anyways. As he returned the favor with a handful of shuriken, I smirked. If he thought that he could just treat my like an ordinary genin and come out unscratched, he'd better think again.

I pulled my hand back sharply, and the near invisible ninja wire attached to my anchored kunai snapped upwards, deflecting several of the spinning stars. I slid to the side and felt the remainder slip past me. Itachi's voice came from the forest, seemingly from every direction at once.

"Interesting use of wire. How good are you with it?"

My mouth mouth tightened as I yanked the kunai out of the tree and snapped the wire, sending it flying towards Itachi. Basic misdirection was useless on me, since all the pranking experience from my first and second childhoods taught me all the tricks that I could ever need - and how to counter them. Shooting into the foliage, my makeshift flail forced Itachi out of his hiding spot once again. This time, he retreated deeper, out of the range of my rather stunted senses. Time for the fox to hunt the weasel.

* * *

Moving in a widening spiral around the central field of the training ground, Uchiha Itachi was confused. No, he was mildly perturbed - it would take much more than a single genin, no matter how surprising, to crack his calm. Still, genin Uzumaki presented a strange puzzle to him - his skill with the kunai and wire combination was not in his files, true, but the real issue was his ability to track a jonin near flawlessly. Even amongst his fellow jonin, Itachi was renowned for his stealth, yet a fresh genin was able to track his movements, twice. Granted, he wasn't trying quite as hard as he should have, but it was quite possible that there was a need for him to put a little more effort in. It wouldn't do to underestimate any enemy, regardless of how weak they seemed. It lead to bad habits, and Uchiha Itachi loathed bad habits.

* * *

My eyes surveyed the landscape, such as it was. Training ground 23 was a mixed field, with a central clearing surrounded by a forest of varying arboreal density interrupted by a few rocky crags and a meandering river. I was looking for - aha! Perfect, a nice sized log just lying there, probably used for practice with the replacement technique. Alright, time to show people why you don't mess with the king of pranksters. Concentrating, I made a few basic clones and sent them out in random directions to keep him from suspecting my plans. Now, all I need is a little bit of time and I'll be set.

I rip a strip of cloth off of my ratty pants - I was probably due for a new pair anyways. It was interesting, how this game limited my usage of advanced skills. Jutsu were prohibitively chakra intensive, even for me, until I learned them in this lifetime. There was an exception on techniques that I knew beyond all others, and for techniques that I made, but most of those would draw just a few too many prying eyes. Taijutsu was limited by the basic abilities of my body, and seals - well, any seal that I drew in ink would not accept any chakra from anyone unless I had officially studied up to that level of sealing. This, however, was not ironclad.

I pull the kunai I had thrown close to me and slice open my palm, digging the blade in deep. A blood spurted out, I drop the kunai and dip the index finger of my other hand into the upwelling pool of blood. Seals that I drew could not be charged, but my blood carried my chakra with it - admittedly, blood also dried up and became useless rather quickly, but it was better than nothing. I trace a circle and begin drawing the pattern I needed for one of my customized explosive tags. It's quite remarkable how many ninja's have no idea how these tags work. The generic, run of the mill version stores a preset amount of chakra and uses a quick burst of chakra to signal the release of the stored energy in a nondirected blast of force, one that usually ignites the air around it and starts fires. My tag, crudely made as it was, had a much higher level of sophistication. The basic storage and release mechanisms were the same, but the released chakra left as a super concentrated blast of pure force. It targeted merely a fraction of the area that a standard tag would hit, but it was capable of accelerating a kunai to speeds beyond that of what even a jonin could react to. As long as Itachi held back from using his sharingan on a mere genin, I was fine. Just in case, though, now would probably be a good time to make a plan B...

* * *

A/N: Okay, this was late. No excuses, except battle scenes are hard to write. Hopefully this makes up a bit for the shorter chapter last time.


	9. The Fox Chases the Weasel

Itachi launched his fist through the head of yet another clone. So far, he'd dispelled ten of the illusions, and based on their dispersion pattern had more or less identified where Naruto was hiding. Either that, or the whole thing was a charade to throw him off the real plan. Normally, he wouldn't suspect a fresh genin of thinking tactically, but genin Uzumaki did not exactly fall under the definition of normal. Regardless, the hour was almost halfway over - he could simply wait out the rest of the time, but that would be relatively pointless, except to establish that the genin could not track and confront a jonin. No, given the objectives for the test that he had been given, it would be more beneficial to spring whatever trap was planned and see how Uzumaki could deal with the unexpected.

* * *

When I had first begun to teach myself how to use a weapon with more range than a kunai, I had no shortage of willing tutors. Unfortunately, learning from ninja who were less than one third of my age was not exactly appealing - it wasn't until I went fishing with Gamakichi that I hit upon the answer to my problems. The next decade or so bore witness to a great deal of experimenting, some of which resulted in rather odd occurrences. I never did manage to duplicate the time when I gave myself a full shave on accident. Still, the flail became my weapon of choice - wild, unpredictable, and able to fulfil a variety of roles - it fit me perfectly. With the years of practice I had, I feel rather confident in proclaiming that there is no one alive who could equal me in that field. What skill was lost when I was returned to the body of my childhood was made up for by the decades of experience my mind retained. A few nasty tricks I picked up over a few wars never hurt either. Considering that these were invented when I was old, it is guaranteed that no one here has ever seen them before.

* * *

Itachi burst into the small clearing that Naruto had taken refuge in. He was somewhat disappointed to find his target standing openly in the middle of the trees, nonchalantly whittling away at a piece of wood in his hand.

"Genin Uzumaki, arrogance is not a desired trait in a ninja."

Itachi's eyes narrowed as he saw a small, sly grin flash across Uzumaki's face. Why - there was a whistling noise as something fell from the sky, moving fast.

"It's not arrogance when you have something to back you up."

A massive log, fully the size of Itachi, slammed into his position and burst into smaller fragments, flying everywhere. The image of Naruto flickered and disappeared, revealing a smaller log in it's place.

"Clever. Using a surprise attack from the sky by launching a trap upwards when you felt me approach. A strategy that takes great timing, but one that ultimately failed."

Itachi strode into the clearing, unscathed. The trap had been a surprise, true, but it would take something of a much higher level to catch him off guard. On that note, he twisted to the side, as the log that Uzumaki used for the replacement technique turned out to be the genin hiding in a transformation and a spread of shuriken hurtled towards Itachi. He reached out and neatly plucked them out of the air, twirling them around his fingers.

"A double replacement, followed by a transformation to make it seem like only one replacement. Admittedly, there are few student in the academy right now who could match your performance. Still, you have yet to lay a hand on me, and there are only fifteen minutes left. Is this your limit, genin Uzumaki?"

* * *

Shit. Granted, Itachi was a complete badass, even as a kid, but he didn't even look ruffled. Seriously, his clothes weren't dusty, much less wrinkled. Then again, I never really expected for any of that to hit him in the first place, but it would have made me feel a bit better if he had to put forth just a little effort. Or look like he was trying, at least. Well, the stage has been set, and it's time for the show to start. First, to get the hell out of ground zero.

* * *

Itachi watched as Uzumaki jumped backwards into the woods. Was that really the extent of his plans? True, his level was higher than the norm, but outside of his remarkable perception, he showed no signs of any other skills that were out of the ordinary. He gave a short sigh as he walked into the center of the clearing, casting his senses forwards and getting lock on the fleeing genin. Itachi paused. He sensed more than just one chakra source around him, but outside of the vibrant signal that was Uzumaki, the others were extremely faint. In fact, it was almost as if they were disappearing. Suddenly, there was a flare of chakra and heat, and a series of resounding cracks echoed as the meter long lengths of wood from the fallen log erupted into a spray of wood that blanketed the clearing.

* * *

The moment my second trap went off, I slipped off the branch I had just landed on, grabbing one that was lower and swingin my body in a vertical arc, reversing my momentum and sending me back towards the explosions. They were the results of a very simple seal that I had run across in a minor border conflict between the Land of Snow and a newly formed village. By using a small, unobtrusive seal to drain the heat from a tree, freezing the sap and creating natural fractures in the wood, the reversal of the seal - something that used no chakra in and of itself - would flash boil the sap, launching the wooden shrapnel in every direction. It worked excellently as a stalling maneuver, since the individual seals left very little in the way of a chakra footprint for sensors, and the flying wood, while not terribly harmful, tended to force ninjas who relied on their eyes to instinctively shield their faces. In most cases this would not be a huge benefit, but against wielders of the Sharingan, who trusted their eyes over all other senses, even when they were not actively using their bloodline, this provided a window where their defenses were at their lowest. The loud noises didn't exactly hurt, either.

As I alighted on a branch overlooking the clearing, I slipped my hand into my pouch and grabbed my makeshift flail. It was time for the second part of my plan.

* * *

The moment Itachi saw the spray of wood, he clamped his eyes shut and covered his face with an arm while leaping backwards. His other hand released the shuriken that he had caught, sending them in a blind path towards the general area that he sensed Uzumaki. In all honesty, he had to admit that he had been completely blindsided. Whatever mechanism Uzumaki used to detonate those logs had been something that he had never seen before, never even heard of, in fact. He reconsidered his earlier judgement of the genin - he may not be anything amazing, but he certainly was tricky.

Before he could regain his footing, however, a whistling noise cut the air and Itachi felt the presence of a quickly moving object shoot right past his shoulder. Twisting his body in midair, tucking his knees into his chest and spinning horizontally, he used his built up momentum to shoot himself sideways just as he hit the trees. Immediately after, a kunai attached to a length of wire slashed through his prior position, reversing its direction at the tug of the wire. Itachi jumped up high into the air above the clearing, flashing through a series of handseals as he ascended. Enough was enough. Uzumaki had shown himself to be capable at strategic planning, but his raw combat abilities had yet to be assessed. Fine. It was time to up the ante.

* * *

A grand fireball blasted through the tops of the trees, toppling several and burning the foliage. A concussive pressure wave radiated from the impact point and kicked up a dust storm, reducing visibility to nothing. Perfect. If I can't see him, then he can't see me. I throw my makeshift flail in the direction I last saw him, while scattering the remainder of my kunai and shuriken in the area around him. If he can't see any of them, at least one of them should hit him. Unless -

A hand clamps down on my shoulder. I freeze, and slowly look behind me, into a pair of blood read pupils with three tomoe floating in a lazy circle.

"Now, genin Uzumaki, that's enough of these games. Why don't you show me what you can really do?"

* * *

A/N: Well, that's two chapters in two days. Whoo. Now then, since we're still not very confident with the battle scenes, review please? Also, with this, we break ten thousand words! Yay, we move up a search filter!


	10. Boom, Headshot

To the average civilian, or even the average ninja, there were a few bloodlines that stood above all the rest. For those who studied the old histories, the Rinnegan would reign supreme, but for those who paid less attention fairy tales, there were more modern abilities that were universally respected - or feared, to be more accurate. The First Hokage had his wood release, a bloodline that still held the record as the one with the ability to affect the largest area of the world, one capable of turning the formerly gently plains of the Land of Fire into a massive forest, almost overnight. Then there was Mu, the Second Tsuchikage, invisible to even the most sensitive of sensors, followed by his successor, Onoki, with his advanced dust release. The Hyuga Byakugan, though not possessed of an incredible power in itself, opened the door to a fighting style that bypassed all ordinary defenses, and gave their ninja an incredible tool for spying. However, one of the most celebrated, and infamous, bloodlines was the Sharingan, for its ability to copy any technique that its wielder set eyes on struck fear in the hearts of nearly all ninja, for their hard earned skills could be stolen nearly effortlessly. To a few ninja inside Konoha, however, there were a few weaknesses to the Sharingan that the Uchiha clan kept a tight seal upon. First of these was a severe limitation on the copying ability of their eyes - they had to see a technique in full before they could take it for themselves. Truncating the sequence of handseals for a jutsu would render a technique impervious to the copy wheel eye, and removing the need for handseals entirely would prevent an Uchiha from predicting the technique as well, for the Sharingan's hyperfocus coupled with unfailing memory gave rise to a sort of prescient ability by analyzing an enemy's movements before they were completed. A drawback was the inability of an improperly trained body to follow the mental stimulation - while a movement could be seen, the body would not be able to react quickly enough to make a difference. Another secret that was closely guarded by the Uchiha was the ability to cast sealless, ocular illusions - an ability that was suspected by many, but rarely proven. All this and more was known to our blond haired protagonist, for all the good it did him.

* * *

The moment I look into the Sharingan, I knew that the battle was effectively over. If it was any other Uchiha - barring Obito or Madara - there was much that I could do to salvage the situation, but Itachi was a master in one field over all others and it was the one field I was weakest in. Genjutsu - the bane of my existence for my earlier years, starting with the basic clone technique - would remain on of my few weaknesses throughout my entire life. Though widely regarded as a prodigy in both ninjutsu and taijutsu, I had never seen another illusionist quite as talented as Itachi, though I had outlived him by a century and a half. On the other hand, he did say he was holding back. The only chance I have now is to let loose with everything I saved up, and hope that something hits him. First, to get rid of this illusion - at least, I think I'm in an illusion. Then again, I'm not actually sure.

* * *

Of all the responses to his exposed Sharingan that Itachi expected, this was not one of them. Shock, fear, anger, despair - these would all be normal. Stabbing oneself in the hip was not. He hadn't even gotten around to place a genjutsu on the genin - something that subtle would be overkill, and would defeat the whole point of the test. Regardless, there were only a few minutes left in the test, and soon the whole point would be moot. He had seen enough to determine that Uzumaki was a good deal above the level of an ordinary genin, but the Hokage had implied something extraordinary.

Itachi leaned backwards and avoided a elbow aimed at his temple, catching the follow up kick with his right hand and hurling the boy into a tree. Uzumaki recovered in mid air and came into close combat again, showing a much higher level of speed and skill than he had earlier. Still, taijutsu against an Uchiha was tantamount to suicide, and Itachi let him know that, redirecting all of his attacks and sending the genin flying into trees all around.

"These can see everything, genin. Your efforts are futile."

* * *

Well, so far this is working out great. With his Sharingan active, nothing I do escapes his notice. I can't feint, since he can see what my body is going to do, and I'm simply not strong or fast enough to actually overpower him. It's lucky that when we fought in the prologue it went unused - that fight would have been much harder. On the other hand, now seems to be great time to use plan B.

"Hey Itachi! Did your eyes see this?"

I throw up a handful of dust I had gathered, obscuring his vision just long enough to ready my flail. The Sharingan could do a lot of things, but see through dust was not one of them. My contingency plan prepared, I swing the kunai at his knees and send a single pulse of chakra down the wire, activating the seal I had placed on the handle earlier. A focused jet of air blasts back from the kunai as it accelerates to speeds beyond that of the human eye to track. Itachi may still be able to see it, but his body would have difficulty reacting to the sudden increase in speed. Granted, I can't see it either, but I had years of experience of controlling a weapon that moved even faster. He jumps over the first pass of the blade, clearing it by inches, and I twitch my hand, bringing the weapon back in a one-eighty spin, heading right at his back.

I had him dead to rights, but some kind of battle honed instinct must have alerted him, and he draws his tanto from his horizontal back sheath, barely deflecting the point of the blade from piercing his spine. I jerk my hand to the left, bringing the kunai back around, as I throw the rest of my unused kunai in a spread to limit his maneuverability. He deflects half of them back at me and sidesteps the flail as it flies past him and drops down, the charge of the seal exhausted. That's the last of my free weapons - all I have left is my flail and my fists. He grabs one of my kunai and throws it back at me, making handseals as he did so. One kunai becomes ten, then twenty, and I'm hedged in by a wall of pointy metal. The smart thing to do here would be to use the replacement technique, but that's probably what he expects me to do. Instead, if I use the first step of the basic rasengan, and then pump massive amounts of chakra through it...

* * *

Uchiha Itachi was being forced to eat his words, a position that he rarely found himself in. The previously lackluster prodigy genin had pulled a speeding kunai attached to wire out of nowhere. Putting together everything he'd seen, he had to admit that Uzumaki's skills were higher than he had first assessed them at. His taijutsu was well refined, if hampered by a weak body, his ninjutsu was at a high level for a genin, his wire control and overall accuracy with weapons was impressive, and his seal work was at a level that most chunin probably couldn't achieve. He'd seen the rudimentary seal tag on the kunai as it flew past him, and while it seemed simple, it was of a design he had never seen before. Most importantly, his level of strategic thinking was obscene when the length of his experience was considered. He'd been a genin for all of three days, but to Itachi's knowledge, even ninja with three years of experience would have difficulty planning all of this out in advance. The individual skills in themselves were nothing amazing, but the sum of all of them made a rather fearsome genin indeed. Thus the use of the kunai shadow clone - he was certain that they posed no real threat to Uzumaki.

Again, Itachi found himself surprised. Rather than use the replacement technique to save himself, Uzumaki held out his hand and created a small vortex of chakra, one that exploded outwards and forced the kunai approaching him to veer off in wild directions. He was paying so much attention to what was going to that he didn't notice the kunai on the ground behind him accelerate and plunge into the back of his head.

* * *

Ha. The bastardized rasengan training step worked to stop the kunai - I'm going to have to experiment with that some more. Even better, Itachi's not paying as much attention as he should - I'm still holding onto my flail, and it's right behind him. I send two gentle pulses of chakra down the wire, one right after another, activating the second seal I placed on the handle just in case. The kunai jumped forward, impaling Itachi, and the look on his face was glorious. Or, it was, until he burst into a cloud of white smoke and vanished.

A slow clapping fills the air, as footsteps approach from behind me. I spin around and see Itachi walking towards me, completely unharmed. I have no idea how I missed sensing him, unless my body is really limiting me that much and he's really just that good.

"Congratulations. Though the hour has passed, you succeeded in landing a strike on my clone. Uzumaki Naruto, you are now officially a genin. Report to this training ground as of next monday to begin training and missions. You make take the next two days to rest and recover. Dismissed."

He vanishes with the body flicker, barely leaving a trace. I slump down, and lie flat on my back. All of that effort, all of that planning, and I barely manage to hit his clone once, when it was holding back to boot. I feel the slow beginnings of a smile creep onto my face - this new world looks like it's going to be a lot more entertaining than I first thought.

**CONGRATULATIONS. ASSIGNMENT MISSION: ARE WE THERE YET? - COMPLETED**

**+100 EXP**  
**UNLOCKED INSTRUCTOR: UCHIHA ITACHI **  
**NEW RELATIONSHIP: UCHIHA ITACHI - STUDENT**  
**ADDITIONAL D-RANK MISSION AVAILABLE**  
**SPECIAL MISSIONS UNLOCKED**

Well, good to know that all of that work got me something.

**LEVEL UP?**

**YES **  
**NO**

"**Yes**." Obviously.

**LEVEL 7:**

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 25 (+3)**  
**CONSTITUTION - 32 (+3)**  
**DEXTERITY - 18 (+2)**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 29 (+2)**  
**WISDOM - 30 (+3)**  
**CHARISMA - 40 (+4)**  
**SPEED - 17 (+2)**  
**SKILL POINTS AVAILABLE: 1**

**AVAILABLE SKILLS:**

**BODY**  
**MIND**  
**SPECIAL**

Well, that's new. Let's see, I took the last level of** Knowledge is Power** at level 4, which unlocked** Eye of the Mind**, which lets me gain a slight insight into battles for every point invested into it. I put one point into there at level 5, and placed level six's point into **Advanced Chakra Control**, which was under **Body**. It changed the way that my control was measured from numbers into stars, the more of which I have, the higher my control. Not completely sure how to get more stars, but I start out with only one. Might as well take a look at the third option.

"**Special**."

**SKILLS: SPECIAL:**

**HEAR MY ROAR (0/9): INCREASES CHAKRA SUPPLY x2, UNLOCKS ACCESS TO BIJU'S CHAKRA.**

Oh. Oh damn. That explains why I couldn't access Kurama's chakra when I tried earlier. Let's go for it.

"**Hear** **my** **roar**."

Oh man, that's a rush. It's like eating a handful of soldier pills, but there aren't any of the side effects. Let's see how much this pushes me to.

"**Stats**."

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 28**  
**CONSTITUTION - 35**  
**DEXTERITY - 20**  
**INTELLIGENCE - 31**  
**WISDOM - 33**  
**CHARISMA - 44**  
**SPEED - 19**

**CHAKRA - 254**  
**CHAKRA CONTROL - *x1**

Wow. Just wow. That's a huge jump in chakra - if I'm right, I might be able to use some of my less chakra intensive techniques even before learning them. This is going to be great.

* * *

"Sir. I have completed testing of genin Uzumaki."

The Hokage leans back in his chair and takes puff on his pipe.

"Always so formal, Itachi. Why don't you relax. I saw the whole battle, even the parts that you could not. Before I tell you what I want you to do, why don't you tell me your opinions?"

"Yes, sir. Though he seemed to take the test seriously, he was holding back. How much, I am not certain, but even with what he showed, he has a great deal of potential."

The Hokage sighed and tapped the bowl of his pipe in a small dish, dislodging the ashes inside.

"True. With the political landscape being what it is, we need to use all the talent we have. So, ANBU agent Uchiha Itachi, here are your orders. You are to take Genin Uzumaki Naruto and forge him into a weapon that will strike fear into our enemies. Try to be gentle about it."

"Yes, sir."

"Dismissed."

As his most loyal ninja left his office, the reigning leader of Konoha leant back and massaged his temples with one hand. Decisions had to be made, some of which were less tasteful than others.

* * *

I sat on my father's head, gazing out over the village as the sun painted the sky with glorious shades of red and purple, lighter colors mixing in as well. Even one hundred years from now, the sight would still calm me. I'm not the child I once was, but it's just beginning to hit me how much i have changed over the years. I was so naive in the past, so hopelessly optimistic. Now, well, I'd like to think myself wiser, or at least older, and my actions were tempered by the weight of my long, long, life. Then again, I became Hokage as a young man - clearly, I did something right back then. To hell with it. I never was one for introspection, and I'm not about to start now. What did it matter if the world was different. There was no point to trying to keep things the same - even the people were different. I'll always treasure the world I left behind, but this world is just begging for interference. Ha. It's not like the old world was perfect anyways. Fine then. Might as well do this properly.

"Hey, Konoha. Ya, you all. Listen up. See this monument here? Get ready to add another face to it, because Uzumaki Naruto is going to be the Hokage!"

* * *

A/N: This is the longest chapter we've ever written, and it's due to some thoughtful reviews from some nice people out there. You guys should know who we're talking about. We have to thank all of you for the support, because real life can suck sometimes, and this makes my partner feel better :)

Review Please! We hope you like the chapter, especially the conclusion to the battle!


	11. Return of the Prankster King

First things first. If I'm going to aim for Hokage - again - I need to know the differences between this world and my own. I've already noticed some in the last few days, but I've barely been paying attention to what's going on around me. Let's start with what I know. First, the world that I arrived in held true to what I know about the years of my childhood. After the difficulty changed, however, there were several changes, and not just to the buildings. People changed too, some just in personality, and others appearing in places where they should not be, and others disappearing from where they should be. In terms of major world events, I don't have access to sources of news beyond basic gossip. To begin with, the Uchiha clan is alive and well, with little to no signs of conflict with the village. From what I remember, Itachi killed his family when Sasuke was seven, almost eight, so the build up to that situation should be happening right now. I just can't see it, though. Even worse, there are clans that I don't recognize, especially one that looks like some kind of offshoot of the Senju. Orochimaru is already gone, so that remains in line with what I know, but the circumstances around that seem different. I can't exactly pinpoint what bothers me about it, but there is definitely something off. Worst of all is the massive tension between the Konoha and Kumo. From what history I remember, Kumo tried to take advantage of Konoha's weakened state after the Kyuubi's rampage, culminating in the attempted kidnapping of Hinata that left Neji's father dead and froze the relationship between the two villages. Here, though, it's as if tensions kept going up, almost to the point of war - in fact it seems like the kidnapping never happened at all!

I freeze. If the kidnapping was never attempted, and it should have happened three years ago, then either it will happen sooner or later, or we will go to war. Unless some other event changes the political landscape, war was practically inevitable. Frowning, I consider my options. At this point in time, there were few legends still left in Konoha - the Professor was beginning to show his age, the Sannin were broken and scattered, and the White Fang had been dead for years, and Kakashi was nowhere near his fathers level. With the death of the Fourth, there was barely a handful of real summoners left in Konoha, and the only one left with a major summon was the Pervert. The bumper crop of jonin that would arise during my academy years don't come into their full strength until after the Massacre at the earliest. The generation before them was solid, but there were few outstanding teams amongst them. The Ino-Shika-Cho was actually the only one that I knew of capable of standing on the international stage. I gnaw my thumb and head down the mountain. As I was now, there was little I could do to influence matters. Whether it came down to a cold war or a bloody one was basically up to chance - that, and how the first blow was struck. I had the knowledge to make a difference, but not the ability to put the knowledge to use. But -

Ah. Yes, that would work. It would take some doing, but if I could not accomplish change on my own, then I would simply have to make allies who could do the work for me. As a matter of fact, there happens to be a group of candidates just waiting to be harvested.

* * *

Uchiha Itachi wasn't sure what to make of the strange genin he had been saddled with. Uzumaki Naruto - biologically, he was only six years old, but at times, he seemed centuries older. The normal reaction to the mindless grind of d-rank missions was absent; there was a curious sense of detachment about him as he went about what amounted to glorified chores. He was quiet, efficient, and at times, so stealthy that even Itachi lost track of him. The worst part was he didn't even seem to realize what he was doing - it was as if he would fall back into old habits when he wasn't paying attention. There were a host of smaller things that Itachi noticed - mannerisms that made no sense, such as stroking a non-existent beard, trying to tug on hair longer than he had, a slight squint, as if peering through thick glasses - the list went on and on. By themselves, each one meant practically nothing. Take them all together, however, and he began to see what had the Hokage so confused about this particular child.

On the other hand, there were times when even calling him a child seemed more gracious than he deserved - he'd known children of the same age whose maturity made Uzumaki Naruto look like he was trying out for the circus. For example, the current prank he was trying to pull. Really, Itachi was curious to know how he got into the jonin lounge in the first place, as it was strictly off limits to anyone of a lower rank. And where on earth did he get that block of sodium? Then again, coffee wasn't his drink of choice anyways, so this didn't really affect him at all. Hmm. Actually, this might prove to be very entertaining indeed.

* * *

Hatake Kakashi was known as a prodigy, and not without cause. He was one of the youngest to ever achieve jonin rank, and had scores of successful mission under his belt. He had an absolute 'no-fail' record as an ANBU captain, and it didn't seem as if that streak was likely to end soon. While his record was certainly impeccable, the person himself had more than a few eccentricities, to put it nicely.

Reading porn in public, for one. As he reached up towards a cabinet and pulled down a small canister, his nose was buried in a distinctive orange book, of the kind usually relegated to private rooms when the reader was sure to be alone. He measured out two spoonfuls of the brown powder, never taking his eyes of the page he was on, dumped them into a waiting cup of steaming water, and mixed. An immediate hissing noise broke the silence in the lounge.

* * *

Oh man. So much for looking underneath the underneath. Watching Kakashi's drink burst into flames while hot water drenched his face was hilarious. On second thought, now would be a great time to get the hell out of here.

* * *

Sarutobi Hiruzen dropped his head into his hands and massaged his aching forehead. It was days like these that made him regret taking back the hat after Minato died - well, days like these and the ridiculous amount of paperwork. Still, he had to smile at the sheer audacity his the blonde's son had. To prank jonin in their sanctuary, and then get away with no proof left behind. or, at least, without any witnesses willing to speak up. His eyes sought the Uchiha standing in the corner, who dipped his head a fraction of an inch and refrained from smiling. At least someone was finding this amusing.

"When several chunin came into my office just a short while ago, complaining that they couldn't catch the little devil, I thought that maybe they were just rusty, or not trying very hard. Then I find out that the same six year old snuck into the jonin lounge - bypassing all security on the way there, must I add - and proceeded to kill a joni in plain sight of several others, without leaving any traces. Truly, you are all a credit to this village."

"Sir, he -"

The hokage slammed his hand down on the table, making paper and pen jump into the air.

"Oh, do be silent Kakashi. I am perfectly aware that no one was actually injured. But - had he wanted to, that little trick could have been performed with something more deadly than plain sodium, and you would very definitely be dead."

"Yes, sir."

"All of you are to step up your training - I will be very displeased if a repeat incident occurs. You all are dismissed, save for you, Itachi."

The other jonin shuffled out of the room, shamefaced, while Itachi maintained his poker face in the corner. Hiruzen waited until he was sure they were out of earshot, and then burst out into huge, belly shaking gouts of laughter. Itachi too, cracked a smile.

"The looks on their faces! Oh, that made my day. Well, Itachi, it seems your student has more skills than meets the eye, hmm? Bring him in to see me soon - it has been quite a while since I last had a proper conversation with him. Then again, many of my worries about his future plans have been assuaged. After all, I doubt that there is anyone in the village who did not hear his voice yesterday afternoon."

Itachi kept smiling, then took a few steps forward and gestured at the Hokage.

"Speaking of your hat, sir..."

The Hokage froze and reached upwards. This time, Itachi really did laugh.

"That damn brat!"

* * *

A/N: Well, this chapter is a bit shorter than the last, but it's also the opening to a new arc. That, and I'm still not feeling all that well.

Review please? Any suggestions for skills would be nice as well - names are getting hard to come up with.


	12. Sink or Swim

Pushing my guinea pigs to increase their training through a judicious use of pranks could only go so far - I have to step up my game as well. As a ninja, there are three main branches of techniques that are available to me. First was ninjutsu, using chakra to change the physical world around me. Second was taijutsu, or any kind of hand to hand combat, with or without weapons, and generally enhanced by chakra. Third was genjutsu, using chakra to effect a mental change on the world around me, something that was usually expressed as an illusion. While I personally have little to no talent for genjutsu, I probably know more about the underlying theories behind it than anyone else alive. The same applies to taijutsu. Limited as I am by my physical age, my vast knowledge of hundreds of styles is basically wasted. Out of the basic three, then, my only practical option is ninjutsu. I feel the corners of my mouth edge upwards. It's a good thing that my specialty has always lain in that path.

* * *

Itachi watched his student with a critical eye. Uzumaki had completed d-rank after d-rank, rarely complaining, and had thus progressed faster than any other genin he had ever heard of. Even Itachi himself had not been this dedicated to being a ninja, at least, not so early on, and there was a significant worry of the genin burning out. Not that one would think so just by looking at him - if anything, he seemed to get more and more motivated as time passed. His personal training had increased as well. Originally, Itachi had given him a schedule to follow in terms of training, a schedule that he himself had followed as a child. Uzumaki had taken that routine and gradually increased every part of it, until his current regimen was nearly three times what was currently proscribed. It was about time that he was given something a little bit harder to work at.

* * *

**CONGRATULATIONS. D-RANK: HOME ALONE (3)**

**+5 EXP**

**+100 RYO**

**LEVEL UP?**

**YES**

**NO**

God, I hated babysitting that particular kid. Well, the good news is I hit another level. The bad news is that the amount of experience I'm gaining from each mission is starting to decrease exponentially.

"**Yes**, I'd like to level up."

**LEVEL 10:**

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 33 (+2)**

**CONSTITUTION - 44 (+4)**

**DEXTERITY - 24 (+2)**

**INTELLIGENCE - 35 (+1)**

**WISDOM - 40 (+3)**

**CHARISMA - 55 (+5)**

**SPEED - 21 (+1)**

**SKILL POINTS AVAILABLE: 1**

**CLASS POINTS AVAILABLE: 1**

**AVAILABLE SKILLS:**

**BODY**

**MIND**

**SPECIAL**

**CLASS ABILITIES:**

**HEAVY ASSAULT**

Class points? That's new. Well, let's take care of skills first, then take a look at the new things.

"**Special**."

**SKILLS: SPECIAL:**

**HEAR MY ROAR (3/9): INCREASED ACCESS TO BIJU'S CHAKRA.**

"**Hear my roar**. Alright, now,** heavy assault**."

**CLASS: HEAVY ASSAULT:SIEGE:**

**FURY (0/1): INCREASES ALL PHYSICAL SKILLS BY AN EQUAL AMOUNT TO A REDUCTION IN MENTAL SKILLS WHEN IN BATTLE. AMOUNT DETERMINED BY USER.**

**STONE COLD (0/1): REDUCES SPEED BY A GIVEN PERCENTAGE, GRANTS EQUAL IMMUNITY TO KILLING INTENT.**

**RAM (0/1): ALL ATTACKS DO MORE DAMAGE AGAINST BARRIERS.**

**RAIN OF FIRE (0/1): ALL WIDE AREA TECHNIQUES REQUIRE HALF THE CHAKRA EXPENDITURE.**

Well, well. These are certainly interesting. **Fury** seems to grant me a pseudo berserker state, which I can do without, thank you very much. I shouldn't have too much of an issue with killing intent to begin with, so** stone cold** is out. The last two, however - all things considered, a rather large portion of my ninjutsu arsenal would most likely count as wide area, so I guess that settles it.

"**Rain of fir**e. Well, I certainly don't feel any different."

Might as well pick up another mission while I'm here. Itachi barely supervises all of my missions, so I've had enough time to clear around forty d-ranks. Speak of the devil, he just arrived at the mission hall right now, wonder why.

"Genin Uzumaki, I understand that you have successfully completed a number of d-ranks without failing a single one."

"Yup. To be honest, they really weren't much of a challenge anyways."

Is that a glimpse of a smile I see on his face? Nah, couldn't be.

"In that case, it is my judgement that you are ready for something else."

He extends a slim scroll tied with a blue ribbon. I take it and slip the bindings off, unrolling the scroll to read the full thing.

**SPECIAL MISSION: C-RANK: OFF TO SEA**

**THE POLITICAL SITUATION BETWEEN KONOHA AND KIRI IS BEGINNING TO BECOME STRAINED AS A RESULT OF A BREAKDOWN OF COMMUNICATIONS BETWEEN THE TWO COUNTRIES. SEVERAL COURIERS HAVE BEEN SENT, BUT KIRI DENIES RECEIVING ANY MESSAGES. LIKEWISE, KIRI CLAIMS TO HAVE SENT SEVERAL MESSAGES THAT KONOHA HAS NOT RECEIVED. YOU ARE TO TAKE A SCROLL CONTAINING WHAT KONOHA KNOWS OF THE SITUATION AND DELIVER IT IN PERSON TO YOUR ASSIGNED CONTACT IN THE LAND OF WATER.**

**REWARDS:**

**75 EXP**

**1000 RYO**

**?**

**?**

**?**

**! ? !**

**! ? !**

**! ? !**

That was not what I was expecting. The rewards section is suspiciously blank, as well. Hmm.

"You will be on this mission essentially unsupervised. I will be nearby, completing a mission of my own, but the bulk of this mission falls upon you. Do you feel ready to accept a mission of this magnitude? There will be no penalties for turning this down."

**ACCEPT SPECIAL MISSION?**

**YES**

**NO**

Huh. Well, I'm not going to say no, but this does make me a little curious about the specifics of the mission.

"**Yes**, I am confident in my ability to see this mission to completion."

**-GAME SAVED-**

What!

"Very well then. You are to leave at dawn tomorrow. Pack well, for this mission will take at least two weeks. Show me your abilities, Uzumaki."

Well, fun fun fun! It's time to make my mark on the world.

* * *

A/N: Alright, this chapter is a good deal shorter than the last few. Two reasons - it's basically the set up for a much longer chapter (and a new arc), and it was unfortunately written with much less input from my partner than usual. Well, here's hoping it wasn't too bad! Review and let us know what you think is going to happen.


	13. Talk to the Hand

As Itachi turned and walked out of the hall, I thought about what kind of problems I might run into. With the level I'm at right now, it would be interesting to see how I stack up against other ninja, especially those from different villages. Now, that I think about it, I realize that I've never actually tried to scan anybody other than those three genin who attacked me about a month ago. Might as well try it on Itachi.

"**Scan**."

**ITACHI UCHIHA - JONIN, LVL ?, A-RANK**

**STRENGTH - ?**

**CONSTITUTION - ?**

**DEXTERITY - ?**

**INTELLIGENCE - ?**

**WISDOM - ?**

**CHARISMA - ?**

**SPEED - ?**

**CHAKRA - ?**

**CHAKRA CONTROL - ?**

Well, that's helpful. Wonder why I can't get any information on him. I guess I'll have to experiment with this too. I walk back home, considering the mechanics of the world that I have puzzled out so far. There seems to be an underlying pattern to much of the actual game, but I don't have enough information to even begin to draw conclusion. Anyways, I need to pack for a mission to Kiri that'll last two weeks. Easy enough, assuming nothing really major goes wrong. Nah, who am I kidding. I might as well bring everything I have, just in case.

Ration bars and emergency ramen stored in scrolls, ten kunai in my left hip pouch, thirty more in scrolls. Ten shuriken in my right pouch, and the fuma shuriken Itachi gave me last week in storage as well. A handful of store-bought explosive tags, tent, sleeping bag, and assorted basic supplies are also stored. My makeshift flail - spruced up however - spooled around my right arm with the kunai tucked in my sleeve. My left arm has series of wide, concentric metal bracelets from my wrist to my elbow. Forehead protector, check. Mission details and message scroll, check. Guess it's time to see what the world looked like one hundred and sixty eight years ago.

* * *

Itachi watched Uzumaki leave the main gate of Konoha at a steady pace, heading east towards the land of water. He'd have to take a boat that would pass the Land of Waves and head deeper into Water, but there should be few complications on this mission. After all, the only reason this was even a c-rank in the first place was because of the distance involved and the fact that involved agents of another country. Other than that, there shouldn't be anything that could go wrong. Regardless, his mission was in southeast portion of Fire anyways, so if a problem did arrive, it shouldn't take more than two days for him to arrive. He grimaced - Konoha was still shorthanded after the Kyuubi attack, and the majority of the upper level ninja were stationed in the north in case of an incursion from Iwa or Kumo. Uzumaki would be fine on a simple c-rank.

* * *

Seriously? Someone up there really hates my guts. Barely six hours out of Konoha, and I run into what looks like a bunch of highwaymen. Where the hell are the patrols that should be clearing the roads? I haven't even seen any signs of a ninja being in the area for weeks - none of the tree branches show any signs consistent with tree-hopping, and there are few Konoha ninja who would walk through a forest unless they had to. Let's see - if I remember my geography correctly, there was a river around here that paralleled the road and where the two crossed each other was a small town. Pretty sure there should be a bounty office there as well. Since I'm right between the river and the road anyways, I might as well clean this up, make some money, and be on my way.

* * *

It is to be noted that in areas near a ninja village, there are little to no bandit problems. The cause was pretty simple - ninjas, as a rule, tended to hate both bandits and pirates, seeing both as cheap rip offs of what they did. As a result, nests of thieves and their ilk tended to vanish, pro bono. Nearby villages repaid this service with cheaper goods and a great deal of respect. When disasters befell a village, however, bandits from all over moved in, seeking to capitalize on the complacency of the villagers who were used to being protected by ninja. This particular group, calling themselves the Demon's Claw Gang, were braver - or stupider - than most. They had set up shop on one of the major roads leading to Konoha, but just far enough away for their effects to not be felt directly by the Leaf. On the other hand, they set themselves up on one of the most travelled roads leading from one of the most powerful ninja villages in the world. All things considered, not one of their better ideas.

* * *

I dart through the trees above the men, who are sitting around a fire, laughing and drinking. There doesn't seem to be any prisoners, but there are a number of tents in the back that might hold some interesting loot. I stop on a branch overlooking the clearing the bandits occupy, wrinkling my nose as the scent of unwashed bodies and stale alcohol reaches my nose. The bladed end of my flail drops into my hand, and the wire begins to loosen from its tight coils. Time to go fishing.

With a flick of my wrist, six inches of steel bury themselves into the back of a head with a squelch, sending up a spray of blood and alarming the whole camp. My eyes flick from one target to the next, assessing them for threats and unanticipated surprises. Nothing - just eight middle aged men who don't seem to have learned the basics of good hygiene. Another sharp movement of my hand sends the kunai snapping into the air in a lazy arc, throwing droplets of blood onto the dead man's companions. Several more snaps of the wire herald the arrival of a red mist, obscuring the fall of three more bodies. One of the criminals has regained his wits, to some degree at least, and hurls his cutlass at me. The cheap, poorly weighted blade veers wide, but my left hand reaches out and snags the sword by its handle. I return the gift with interest, one man's chest sprouting a length of metal, while another man's head splits like a rotting melon. Two left - nope, sorry, make that one. The newly dead bandit ran straight into the ninja wire, carving off his own head. Idiot. Ninja wire cuts indiscriminately - the only way to handle it is to insulate your fingers with a thin layer of chakra. Hence the name - everyone else who tries using it tends to lose a hand or two. Ah, the last man is trying to run away - how cute. Well, we can't have that! The kunai jumps back into my hand, and I spin it by the ring on the base.

The bandit is stumbling through the forest when I catch up with him, creating enough of a trail for a blind man to find him. I drop from the tree and slam him into the ground, by knees digging into the back of his shoulders.

"Well, well, what do we have here. Are there anymore of you pests, by chance?"

"No, no, no, no - that was all! Let me live! Please! I'll never do anything again, I'll be a good man, I'll never kill or ra - "

Well, that made up my mind. Never did like rapists. I clean the kunai on the back of the dead man's shirt, then carefully wrap the flail around my arm again. Time to see what I can get from the tent.

* * *

As it turns out, the bandits had been there for long enough to amass a pretty sizeable hoard. Quite a bit of fancy jewelry, too. I kept a few pieces for myself, then returned the rest of the loot to the nearby village, along with a written report for them to deliver to Konoha detailing my actions. The bodies I left at the bounty station - didn't get much money, but at least I got something. Picked up around 25 experience points as well, but the thieves had nothing that would be useful - their weapons were of the lowest quality possible, and I'd probably be better off using my bare hands than relying on those pieces of junk.

At any rate, this little detour is over. Let's hope that this was the extent of the surprises that I'll run into on this mission, and that the next two weeks pass peacefully. Damn it, I wish I had more weapons.

* * *

The Bloody Mist, as Kiri was occasionally named, was an apt descriptor of the actual land itself. The Land of Water was comprised of a series of small island chains surrounding a larger landmass. The actual center of government and hidden village lay on this larger landmass, but outside of that, there were hundreds of smaller towns scattered throughout the islands. As a result, the average Kiri ninja had a default specialization in stealth. Assassinations were one of the forte's of the Mist, and their hunter-nin were amongst the best anywhere, as an effect of having to hunt down ninja who could hide anywhere on dozens of shrouded islands. The weather in the Land of Water was another issue - there was probably as much water in the air above the land as there was below the land. Water specialists were aplenty in Kiri, with good reason. They were better known for a set of fearsome swordsmen, however. The Seven Swordsmen of the Mist were Kiri's answer to the s-ranked ninja of the other villages. Each possessed a unique blade, a force multiplier that set them at levels that the average ninja could never hope to achieve. Each swordsman also specialized in a field outside of swordsmanship, and all were highly ranked ninja, even without their swords. Possibly the most frightening aspect of the Mist, and the reason that they had never been successfully invaded, was the ridiculous proliferation of bloodlines throughout the Land of Water. As many of these clans were originally refugees from other lands, their numbers tended to be on the smaller side, but the Yuki, Houzuki, Kaguya, and Terumi clans, along with many others, made up for their lack of quantity with their quality. The Kaguya were especially prominent on the front lines of any conflict, with their inborn lust for battle. As a result of the capabilities of the clans, regular ninja were stirred up against them, with rumors circulating that their abilities were the result of copulating with demons. Tensions were running height, with inter village strife occasionally leading to combat inf the streets. The Fourth Mizukage, Yagura, was holding the peace via superior force, but it was unknown how long the country could last like this.

It was into this powder keg that our unsuspecting and plucky young hero steps into. Listen, boys and girls, this is exactly why you pay attention in history class. Especially to the dates major wars started on. Come on, name the dates of the beginnings of any five wars - no looking up answers, by the way. What? Back to the story? Oh alright, but remember - a lack of information can kill.

* * *

God I hate boats. These cheap rowboats are the worst. Fifteen people in a worn down contraption that should rightfully only hold eight at the most. Well, after boarding a larger vessel at the border of Fire, I found out that there are few ships actually travelling directly to the mainland. Most are stopping at the outermost island that was under the rule of Water, and subsequent steps of my journey would have to be completed by foot and by tiny little boats. Still, the general attitude amongst the civilians was worrying. While Konoha and Kiri had a pact of neutrality, and thus I was personally rather safe, there was always the chance of running into a missing-nin. Seriously, the recent addition of the** bingo book** that I picked up from the bounty office turned out to have a huge number of Kiri ninja. It also turned out to be a hidden aspect of the game, and "augmented the scan function." Well, I can guess what that means.

Ah, the boat is docking at a pier. Time to look for yet another ride to the next island. Or, since half the harbor just exploded, time to kick someone's ass. Oh, it's good to be young.

* * *

"The clans oppress us! They grind us under their cursed boots, laughing at us mere mortals as they use their demonic talents to gain advantages over us. Kill the demons! Here is one of those scum now! They're not so tough when they have a knife in their guts."

Sakamoto Soujiro was a twenty year old chunin from Kiri. Not a very good chunin, admittedly, but his skills were solid. However, in his opinion, he was more than qualified to become a jonin - a rank that both of his teammates, members of a clan, had already reached. To him, this smacked of discrimination, that he was passed over in favor of less qualified ninja just because of his lack of a bloodline. It didn't help that his instructor from his genin days, one Yuki Minami, had told him the reason he was being ignored was a lack of anything that made him stand out. Hah. She's not so haughty now, with a poisoned kunai sticking out from her kidneys. It'd be a shame to kill such a prime specimen of womanhood, but the bitch already had a child. Come to think of it, that brat was probably a carrier of a bloodline as well. Huh. Demonspawn should all be rounded up and burned - it was only a matter of time before the Mizukage came around to that point of view.

"Wow. A grown man holding up an injured woman by her hair. This reminds of a scene from a really bad movie I saw the other day. Then again, the movie was probably intended for males a good ten years older than me - that age group isn't particularly known for thinking straight, especially in certain circumstances."

A shrill, childish voice cut through the voice of the crowd around him, and Soujiro peered through the mist to find the idiot with a death wish.

"Come here and say that to my face, you coward! Where are you?"

He jerked Minami's hair and she whimpered as the blade in her side ground against a rib. Really, it was surprisingly easy to go to her house for tea - she'd retired just last year, opting to marry and raise her child. Well, she let her guard down, and he'd paid for the tea with steel.

"Hey, mister, you're not a very good ninja, are you? I'm right here."

What? Soujiro looked down to where the voice was coming from, and saw a runty little kid with a Konoha headband.

"No way. Is Konoha really so strapped for manpower that they're sending useless children on missions? Scram kid, before you end up like this thing."

He jerked Minami's head up and spit in her face. Looking back at the kid, he saw him frowning and reaching for a pouch on his hip. Soujiro focused his ki and blasted the Konoha ninja with scenes of his death. A raised eyebrow and a smirk was not the reaction he was expecting.

* * *

For a moment, I have the urge to ask the Kiri nin if he was feeling constipated. The grimacing and scowling he directs in my direction was kind of offsetting until I realize that he's trying to scare me with killing intent. Dear god, this is pathetic. I can't even feel anything from him - I've seen scarier six year olds. Granted, I also happen to have seen a good number of mirrors, but that's not important. What was important was the woman who was bleeding out in front of me. Now, I've always had a soft spot for women - honestly, I blame both of my early teachers. You can only spend so much time around rampant perverts until some of it rubs off on you. On the other hand, there is something about this woman that seems vaguely familiar. I'm not quite sure what it is, but I'd rather not have her die just yet. Also, this idiot is starting to annoy me.

"Hey, ninja. Before I beat you black and blue, there's a couple things I want to tell you. First of all, that's not how you treat a woman, especially a beautiful one. Second, you're and idiot. Finally, you're about to get your ass handed to you be Uzumaki Naruto, Konoha genin."

The idiot opens his mouth, probably to say something stupid again, but I've had enough of this. I can feel myself getting stupider by the second. Seems like idiocy really is contagious. His words never escape his mouth as my heel slams into his solar plexus, knocking the wind out of him, throwing him back a dozen yards or so, and freeing the woman, who I catch in my arms. Ugh. Holding a beautiful woman in a bridal carry is a lot easier when your head comes up past her chest.

"You, you need to run. He's a chunin. You'll never beat him."

Alright, what is it with people looking down on kids. Seriously, this lady's first words - and possibly her last, considering her current state - aren't a thank you, but a warning to get out of here. Gah. What do I have to do to get a little respect around here.

"Hey, lady. No offense, but I think the knife wound in your chest is messing with your head too. Just wait here until I finish with this idiot."

"No, wait -"

I ignore her cries and set her down gently. It's time to see how much I've improved.

"**Scan**."

**SAKAMOTO SOUJIRO - CHUNIN, LVL 15, KIRI**

**STRENGTH - 55**

**CONSTITUTION - 35**

**DEXTERITY - 20**

**INTELLIGENCE - 15**

**WISDOM - 20**

**CHARISMA - 20**

**SPEED - 30**

**CHAKRA - 115**

**CHAKRA CONTROL - *X2**

**SPECIALTIES: ASSASSINATION, WATER NINJUTSU**

**BOUNTY: 500 RYO**

**DANGER: HIGH D-RANK TO LOW C-RANK**

**THREAT: LOW**

Well, that's handy. Good thing I picked up that** bingo book**, then.

"**Stats**."

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 35**

**CONSTITUTION - 48**

**DEXTERITY - 26**

**INTELLIGENCE - 36**

**WISDOM - 43**

**CHARISMA - 60**

**SPEED - 22**

**CHAKRA - 324**

**CHAKRA CONTROL - *X1**

So, he's stronger than me, faster than me, and has a decent chakra pool. On the other hand, he really is an idiot. His chakra control is higher than mine as well - I wonder what you need to do that. It can't be too hard, considering that even he managed to do it. Oh, look, he's up, and he looks pissed off. Good.

"You brat! I was going to let you off easy, but now I'm going to rip you limb from limb."

Well, at least it's more imaginative than the last set of threats I heard.

* * *

Soujiro didn't really care who the punk in front of him was - genin were little more than cannon fodder, and he could kill them by the bucketful.

On the other hand, it seems that he forgot that even the greatest of ninja was one day a genin.

* * *

The Kiri ninja's fist rushes towards my face and I bend out of the way, feeling the displaced air stir my locks. Damn - all joking aside, getting hit by one of those is going to hurt. I fall over backwards and land in a compressed handstand. As the momentum of his charge pulls him forwards, I lash out with both my feet, planting them into his chest and driving him upwards. Ah, Lee, the credit for this one's all yours.

As his body rises into the air, I spring back to my feet and jump above him. He's already starting to reorient himself to defend, but it's too late. Like a jackhammer, my feet pound into his crossed arms, driving him to the ground, and then into a small crater. By this point the crowd has retreated into the mist - damn cowards. He coughs blood and slam my right heel into his head, only for it to smash into a puddle of water that he replaced himself with.

A faint breeze brushes my neck and I drop to the ground as a jet of highly pressurized water slices through the space my head was a moment ago. Some kind of variation of the basic water whip, I'd guess. Not bad. Not very impressive, either, but he's better than I thought.

I return the attack with a handful of shuriken that arc around him and approach from multiple angles. Thank you Itachi, for forcing me to work on my accuracy and technique till I was "barely-passable." Since that came from the man who is greatest master of shuriken in his generation, I'll take that a serious compliment. The chunin, Sakamoto his name was, pulls out a pair of Kiri's signature curved kunai and deflects all the metal stars into the ground.

"Try harder, brat. A few tricks with shuriken aren't going to do you any good."

"Well, maybe not the shuriken. What about this?"

I reach into my jacket and pull out a small scroll, one that fits in my hand. It took a while, but I was able to find some books in the general library that described fuinjutsu just enough for me to be able to legitimately use low level seals. As I pulsed chakra into the seal on the scroll, I threw the paper in Sakamoto's direction and flashed through a number of hand seals. Really, the number of low ranked ninjutsu in the Konoha General Ninja Library was quite astounding, as was the power of those techniques in the hands of a master. Or, in this case, the hand.

A puff of smoke signals the release of all thirty kunai in the scroll, and a blast of wind leaves my hand at the same time. It is a rather weak wind technique on its own, lacking the ability to do much damage to anything, but as an accelerant for pointy metal bars it serves wonderfully. Sakamoto barely has enough time to dive out of the way, and even then a few of the kunai hit him. First blood goes to the genin in the red corner. He's yelling about something again, but honestly, I stopped listening a while ago. I'd like to avoid using my flail, and I'm pretty much out of ranged weaponry. Explosive tags aren't as effective in wide open spaces like this, so I guess, it'll have to be hand to hand. Wonderful.

* * *

Soujiro was having a hard time believing that a single genin was turning out to be this much trouble. Now he was closing to melee range, however, and that was something that the chunin specialized in. Time to teach the kid what a real ninja could do.

He settled into his stance and watched as the blonde genin rushed towards him. The Konoha nin led with a spinning roundhouse kick aimed at his knee, which was pushed aside by a slap to the thigh. He followed that up with a rising spearhand aimed at the throat that the blond barely twisted away from. An elbow to the ribs was caught between Soujiro's hands, but he was forced to let go as a foot flashed out at his groin. A small hop backwards removed the danger from the kick and gave him an opening. On after another, Soujiro's hands sped towards the blonde's unprotected face. Like the blows from a hammer, his hands blasted into the genin's arms that were raised just in time to prevent a knockout. The kid was slammed into the ground, and Soujiro wrung out his right hand. It felt like the kid was wearing some kind of armor underneath his orange jacket. Not like it mattered. If that was as far as the blonde could go, then this was as good as over.

* * *

I hop to my feet, spitting out blood and checking for damage. Nothing permanent, but there's going to be a nice set of bruises come tomorrow. Damn. This is pretty much over. Looks like I'll have to pull out a little surprise. The metal rings around my left arm aren't there for decoration or defense. They are meant to be a very poorly done version of something I wore in the past, but these aren't going to even be a tenth as useful. Then again, considering that I erased a mountain with the original when I was ninety, these should do fine. I shift my stance, rolling up my sleeve as I did so. Even for someone of my skill, I'd need at least a minute to finish this, and both of my hands are going to be occupied. As Sakamoto closed to finish me off, I arced by back foot in a crescent, forcing him to stop. At the same time, I sliced my right thumb open to the bone with the head of my flail. As Sakamoto attacked again and again, I blocked his hands with long, arcing motions of my legs. My hand was a blur as I inscribed seal after seal on the flat surfaces of the rings. He came down with an overhead chop, kunai in hand, and I fell to my back and snapped a kick into his elbow. There was a slight pop - a break was probably too much to hope for, but that certainly must hurt. He reels back and I take the opportunity to pop back up, just in time for a side kick to double me over and send my flying. I was wrong earlier - getting hit by him wasn't just going to hurt, it blew in one of my ribs.

* * *

Soujiro felt the genin's ribcage crack under his foot and knew the battle was done. He'd put up a good fight, especially for a kid - it'd be worth checking to see if there were any bounties on his head.

"Well, you were fit to lick my boots, I guess. Now, demonspawn, let's see whether you blood is the same color as a human's."

Watching his former teacher crawl away from him was a huge power trip. He'd had a crush on her when he was younger, but of course, a bloodline wielder would never look at a regular ninja. Oh, he was going to enjoy this.

"Hey, Kiri-nin. You really need to learn to make sure that your enemy is dead before you turn you back on them."

Soujiro spun around to see the face of the genin he thought was finished, with a set of metal rings around his arm glowing a violent red. The blonde slammed his palm into Soujiro's chest and slapped the rings with his other hand.

"Bye-bye. Shame there won't be enough of you left for a grave."

* * *

A huge blast of pure force erupted from my hand, vaporizing the man's chest and turning the rest of him into mush. Little bits and pieces of flesh fell from the sky and littered the land, making the island air live up to the moniker of the Bloody Mist. I struggle to breathe. Fully three quarters of my chakra was used in that last attack - I had next to nothing left, at least one broken rib, and an unconscious woman bleeding out at my feet.

God damn it. I'm going to miss my boat.

* * *

A/N: Well, two chapters in one day. One of the shortest and one of the longest, to boot. I'm finally over most of the medical issues, and when I saw what my partner posted, I had this urge to write more. With this, we should break twenty thousand words! Anyways, I hope you guys like the chapter - it's not quite as edited as usual, but I think I caught most of my errors. Here is the first chapter of the new arc, and I'll say this much - things are just going to get worse. As I put it to a reviewer, it's like a diplomatic courier with a pistol wandered into the siege of Tobruk during WW2.

Review please! Please?


	14. Spelunking? Bring Breath Mints

Yup. Forget missing the boat, there's no one in sight. The entire harbor is desolate and there isn't even a whisper of movement. I bend slightly and hiss as something in my chest grates. Oh, that's a broken rib, alright. A little probing reveals that the damage is worse than I thought. The seventh through tenth false ribs are definitely broken, and the sixth true rib is either cracked or bruised. A group of civilians could wipe the floor with me right now. Even worse, my wounds aren't healing. Usually, my Uzumaki inheritance combined with minute traces of the Kyuubi's chakra would start knitting these up immediately, but I can't feel anything fixing itself. Great. This is the perfect time to find out another thing that the world restricts.

**CHUNIN SAKAMOTO SOUJIRO DEFEATED.**

**+200 EXP.**

**LEVEL UP (X2)?**

**YES**

**NO**

Two levels at once? I guess it's from the level gap or the difference in ranks.

"**Yes**."

**LEVEL 12:**

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 35 (+5)**

**CONSTITUTION - 48 (+7)**

**DEXTERITY - 26 (+4)**

**INTELLIGENCE - 36 (+6)**

**WISDOM - 43 (+8)**

**CHARISMA - 60 (+12)**

**SPEED - 22 (+3)**

**SKILL POINTS AVAILABLE: 2**

**AVAILABLE SKILLS:**

**BODY**

**MIND**

**SPECIAL**

"**Special. Hear my roar, hear my roar**."

Alright, that takes care of that. I'm not magically healed or anything, but it is a good deal easier to move around. Probably a benefit of having a higher constitution - I can take more damage before I'm incapacitated.

"Konoha...genin. Help...me."

And sleeping beauty wakes up. Lovely. Time to see what else is wrong here. As I slowly move towards the woman's direction, I gather the scattered weapons lying around. It's not like I have enough to just throw them and forget about it. It takes a little longer than I like, but I gather everything used in the battle and seal it all away. The woman is a little bit trickier. I stand around four feet tall and tip the scales at sixty pounds - she has to be almost two feet taller than me and thrice my weight, most of it muscle. Oh, the knife in her chest doesn't help, either. It smells like poison as well, the cheap kind. Good thing I picked up basic first aid somewhere along the way.

* * *

Yuki Minami was having a bad day. Well, that would be a slight understatement, but she wasn't the kind of lady to use stronger language, retired ninja or not. After all, she had a daughter to raise, and no child of hers would grow up in any manner but one befitting the heritage of the Yuki clan. Doesn't matter if there's only a handful of them left, anyways. We're getting off track here.

Minami woke up that morning and went about her daily business. A surprise visit one of her former students interrupted her usual routine, but she gladly invited him inside and went about preparing tea. A knife through her side followed by a bumpy ride as she was pulled by her hair was another deviation from her schedule. After the cheap villainous speech from Soujiro, she then watched a blond child show up, proclaim that he was a genin from Konoha, and proceed to engage the black sheep of her team in combat. The events after that were a little bit hazy, as the poison was really starting to get to her, but she could have sworn that the child vaporised Soujiro. There must have been some pretty strong hallucinogens on that knife. She fainted again.

* * *

Well, I got the knife out and bandaged the wound. There's not much I can do about the poison without more supplies. Conveniently enough, the idiot chunin didn't even bother trying to conceal his traces as he bulldozed through the city. Seriously, there was a thin line of blood leading away from the battle site and deeper into the main cluster of buildings. Well, except for the areas coated in his blood. Did he drag her through the streets by her hair or something?

* * *

Minami opened her eyes and looked a familiar ceiling. Odd, really, it looked exactly like the one she woke up to everyday. Maybe the whole issue with her former student was just a figment of her imagination. Relieved, she tried to sit up and fell, gasping in pain. Okay, not a dream.

"Hey, stay down. I just finished stitching you up. You'll probably feel a few after effects from the poison, but I managed to draw most of it out."

The blond genin held up a worn out rag with a crudely drawn circle in blood inscribed in the center. There were also a number of purplish stains that discolored the cloth - probably the extracted poison.

"It was pretty simple stuff, to be honest. Even a simple seal was enough to separate it from your blood. It helped that he left a trail leading clear back to your house, because there were a lot of things I needed to patch you up that I didn't have with me. Ah, I also took the liberty of taking a few medical supplies for myself. Hope you don't mind."

He rubbed the back of head, looking sheepish. Minami fought the urge to smile at the sight - it wouldn't do to have her savior know that he looked absolutely adorable in that position.

"Your name was Uzumaki Naruto, was it not? Words alone are not enough to express my gratitude to you. Take what you want - there is little I have that could go towards settling my debt to you."

If anything, her words made him even more embarrassed.

"Ah, no, it was nothing. Anybody would have done that. Really, I don't need a reward! It would be nice to get a few questions answered, though."

Minami chuckled and motioned for Naruto to sit by her head.

"So modest - you remind me of my daughter. She just turned eight recently, and it would be a tragedy if I left her without a mother." She shifted in her futon slightly. "So, young ninja, ask me what you will."

Naruto folded his legs and plopped down to the floor, crossing his arms and tapping his chin. "Well, I'm kind of running on a tight schedule, and I just missed the boat to the next island in the chain. Is there any other way to cross the sea?"

"Ah, I am surprised you take the boat at all, considering you are a ninja. Do you not know how to walk above the waves? No! Why, that is one of the first skills that any Kiri genin learns. In fact, there is a scroll lying on the small table in the dining room - it contains instructions for the technique. It belongs to my daughter, but she will not fault you for taking it. I can always create another one for her."

"Thank you very much! Really, that's the most pressing thing that I have to ask you. Try to get some rest. Is there anyone I can ask to look after you."

She reached out and patted his knee. "Such a sweet child. No, my husband and daughter should return shortly, and they will be able to care for me."

Naruto bounced to his feet. "Alright then! I hope you feel better soon. I'll be going now, lots of places to be and not enough time to travel." He waved and turned to walk out of the room.

"Wait!" Minami called him just as he stepped over the threshold. "I will not ask what your mission is, for that is private to you. Just take this warning with you - there have been several rumors from the mainland concerning a degree of civil unrest in Kiri. Be careful wherever you are going, and when you return, come visit me, alright?"

Naruto smiled without looking back, and held up a thumb over his shoulder. "You got it!"

* * *

**Water Walking: This technique allows for movement along liquid surfaces. Chakra required: 2. Chakra control required: *x1**

**LEARN: WATER WALKING (SUPPORT)?**

**YES**

**NO**

"**Yes**."

**LEARNED: WATER WALKING.**

**+50 EXP**

Alright, that takes care of my transportation issues. Now, the question is, do I try to make it to the mainland directly, or should I hop from island to island. I take a step onto the ocean, and my question answers itself. Nope, I'm not going to be going very far today. Aim for the next island over.

* * *

Honestly, walking on the ocean is kind of boring. After my sandals were soaked through with salt water, along with the rest of me, I'm cold, shivering, and bored. I can see the edge of the next island, so at least this will be over soon.

As I approach the shore, I circle around the island, looking for a secluded cove to set up camp. There's a nice little inlet by a cliff, perfect. I head towards the beach, glad to finally be off the water. I forgot how much I hated to travel through the sea by foot. My ribs and other assorted bruises aren't helping either. I unseal the tent and pitch it out of the wind. Hopefully, nothing else comes up between here and Kiri.

* * *

As luck would have it, I arrive on the shores of mainland Water without any other complications. The designated location for the message hand-off was just slightly inland, and would be marked by a blue and red flag. Not exactly something subtle, but for a routine meeting like this, subtlety wasn't needed. To be honest, the only reason this whole thing wasn't being handled by a messenger bird was because relying on birds could easily become a bad habit. Nearly all ninja villages, and some daimyos as well, had specially trained birds that could track and bring down its target without inflicting serious harm. After the message was intercepted, the bird would be released to continue its journey, with neither the sender or the recipient aware of the third party. No - outside of simple exchanges between entities, nearly all correspondence was carried out by ninja. The least sensitive messages, or packages, were generally taken by chunin or a genin team, while courier-nin handled nearly everything else. As they were bound to no nation and very distinctly treated every customer with the same degree of privacy, most villages agreed to a total non-aggression policy towards them. In other words, ninja tended to not shoot the messenger - usually. In case of highly sensitive material, or things that didn't officially exist, teams of three or more jonin were sent out. Outside of war this was generally never a necessity, but villages would occasionally send out jonin teams with simple, even meaningless, messages in order to confuse those who would be watching. My current mission would fall under the category of too urgent to be trusted to a bird, but not really important enough to require more than token protection. There wasn't even a signal or countersign required. Whatever - it paid as a c-rank, and gave experience as one as well.

Alright, according to my instructions, I should be coming up on a set of trees, and yes, there's a Kiri-nin standing by a red and blue flag. Outside of a minor incident, this mission was pretty peaceful - a far cry from my first c-rank.

The ninja straightens from his half-slouch and by the time I reach him, professionalism was all that he projected. Nice try, buddy - I saw you nodding off there.

"You the Konoha-nin we got word about?" The man had a distinct accent, but no real distinguishing features. Brown hair, brown eyes, standard chunin flak jacket, three visible weapons pouches - probably no more than twenty years old.

"Here's the message. Is that all?" I unseal the scroll and hand it over. He does a cursory check to see if it's genuine, then slips it inside a pocket on his jacket. He nods and turns to leave. Well, one week of travel here and one back. All for this? Makes me happy that I never really took any courier mission last time - then again, last time Konoha needed every available hand ready to fight. I guess we still have a few years before things build to a head. I shake my head and clear my thoughts. No point thinking about possible difficulties in the future - things right now are pretty easy. Actually - this was too easy.

I cross my arms and stare in the direction that the Kiri-nin ran off in. If it was so easy to get a message from Konoha to Kiri, why was there a communications breakdown in the first place? The mission details said nothing about any fatalities on the Konoha side, or even any difficulties in delivering scrolls, so the trouble must be on the Kiri side. There was a ninja waiting at the predesignated meeting point. Fine, they probably had a few low level grunts out here on a rotation. There was nothing particularly suspicious about the ninja himself. It's doubtful that there was any kind of corruption that could prevent messages from reaching the administrative center of the village - at least, not so openly. The only other place for something to go wrong was in the travel between the dropoff point and the village proper. There shouldn't be anything that should go wrong that many times in such a short distance - then again, it probably wouldn't hurt to check it out. A little detour should be okay - I'll just pretend I got lost and needed directions. Not the most inspired excuse, but one that should work, especially considering my apparent age and rank.

* * *

On second thought, this is probably going to be more of a pain that I thought. Actually, I have the feeling that things are going to go to hell very, very quickly. Following the ninja's trail wasn't overly difficult - he made token efforts to cover his tracks, but he clearly wasn't trying to stop a determined pursuer. Actually, it seemed more like he was trying to move as fast as possible. Makes sense why really. I'd move pretty fast too, if there was something out there that was trying to separate my head from my body. In his case, at least, whoever tried was quite successful. It's a pretty clean cut, as well. Not clean enough to be a wind technique, but it was either a supremely talented ninja with a serious affinity for water techniques, or somebody with a peerless blade. Considering where I am right now, I'd lay good money on both. On that note, I get the feeling that I know what happened to the other couriers.

I check his body, and as I suspected, he's been stripped of everything that could be useful. No weapons, no scrolls. Damn. Technically, that means that my mission is a failure, or close to one. Well, not entirely. If I can catch whoever did this, take the scroll back from them, and deliver it directly to Kiri, the mission can still be salvaged. Of course, with my body in the shape it is, the chances of me winning a confrontation with anyone above the rank of genin are slim at best. My ribs are knitting - thank you brute force half-assed medical ninjutsu that I picked up somewhere along the line - but any kind of impact would rebreak them and leave me worse off than before. Since the only thing I happen to be combat ready with is my chakra levels, it looks like I have to bring out the big guns.

* * *

Saite Koke was an average chunin. He graduated from the academy at the age of twelve, failed his first two chunin exams, and was finally promoted in the third. At the age of twenty three, he was starting to feel that his skills were stagnating. To be honest, he didn't really care - he was more interested in settling down and starting a family, since a ninja was lucky to reach their forties. He had his eye on this nice girl who waited tables at his favorite restaurant. They'd been flirting on and off for a few months, and he was working up the nerve to aim for more.

As he stood guard in the opening to the network of caves behind him, he silently cursed the heavy mist that had rolled in like clockwork. He never had been a fan of the weather in the Land of Water, and having guard duty during the misty hours was the worst. The most excitement he had all day was a superior leaving about an hour ago, and coming back spattered with blood. He shivered in remembrance. He never did like that creep - he enjoyed killing more that was politically correct, even for the bloody mist. So caught up was he in his thoughts, the metal noose that settled over his head went unnoticed until it was too late.

* * *

**CHUNIN SAITE KOKE DEFEATED.**

**+50 EXP.**

**LEVEL UP?**

**YES**

**NO**

Huh. I guess easy assassination grant less experience than fighting openly. Makes sense, I guess. "**Yes**."

**LEVEL 12:**

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 40 (+2)**

**CONSTITUTION - 55 (+3)**

**DEXTERITY - 30 (+2)**

**INTELLIGENCE - 42 (+2)**

**WISDOM - 51 (+4)**

**CHARISMA - 72 (+6)**

**SPEED - 25 (+2)**

**SKILL POINTS AVAILABLE: 1**

**AVAILABLE SKILLS:**

**BODY**

**MIND**

**SPECIAL**

"**Special. Hear my roar**." Alright, that's seven of nine levels in that. Might as well finish it off. Now that I stop to think about it, my stats are somewhat lopsided. I might have to invest some points in some stat boosters soon. My speed could really hurt me in the long run - forget the long run, if I really go through with my plan, I might be screwed pretty soon.

Well, the way that this game works, I can't use techniques that I haven't learned. On the other hand, pretty much all other skills carried over. I probably have enough experience sneaking around to pull this off, but I'm sick of being limited like this. I wonder - tree walking counted as a technique, but there are a couple tricks that I know that very nebulously defined. Well, the worst that could happen is I die and have to load from the beginning of the mission. Even if this ends up costing exorbitant amounts of chakra, I should be able to draw on the Kyuubi's chakra at need. Here goes - time to walk into the deep, dark cave, fight of an unknown number of ninjas, and retrieve the missing message. I knew I jinxed this mission earlier.

* * *

There was a general consensus amongst all the ninja living in the caverns that short of a small army attacking, their position was nearly impregnable. They were surrounded by hundreds of yards of solid rock on all sides, there was a large spring deeper in the caves, and enough food had been stockpiled to last for three years. Only three entrances led into the depths, and all were guarded around the clock. On top of that, there were contingency plans for nearly everything that could go wrong, ranging from a freak earthquake to the full might of a biju being brought down on them. Granted, the idea for the last one was to find an unblocked path and run away really fast, but the principle held. This, however, probably could not have been anticipated by anyone.

The first warning was a breeze that swept through the cavern. Not exactly alarming, but slightly unusual, considering the distance between the open air and the occupied area as well as the strength of the wind. The second was a dull roaring sound that steadily got louder and closer. At this, several ninja perked up and moved to investigate. The third, and most obvious, was the bodies of those ninjas being flung back into the cavern at high speeds, followed by a young blond surrounded by massively powerful streams of wind that were chewing up the rock around him like it was paper.

* * *

At the height of my power, I became the second ninja to ever receive a flee on sight order. Of course, at that point, if I could be seen there was no point in running since I knew I was being watched and there was no point in trying to outrun me. My father was the first, and I was the second - guess there's just something in the family. He achieved his legendary status by being really, really fast - that and his immense abilities with seals, most notably the flying thunder god technique. I never did figure out quite how he managed to do that; as techniques go, that one remained a mystery even a century after his death. Trust me, there were a lot of people working on it as well. My method, however, was slightly more ... crude.

I had used the very first step, the body of the wind god, against Itachi back in the prologue. Using the barest minimum of power possible, I manipulate the surrounding air into forming a cyclonic vortex. Here, I skip the preliminary setup and jump straight to the second step. By constantly blasting out "arms" of my chakra, tuned very closely to becoming wind natured but not quite all the way there, I pull the surrounding air in the direction of the projection. The more violent the output, the more powerful the result. Officially learning the tree and water walking techniques made this significantly easier - all I am doing is overcharging the process and directing it from different parts of my body. Anyone could do this - the only barrier is the enormous chakra cost. The most important part of this step is what makes it so hard; if it wasn't for the help I got from Neji's grandson, I may never have figured this out. By bastardizing the initial procedures and for performing the Hyuga's kaiten and the basic concepts behind it, I can twist them and apply them to the rampant chakra flying around me, turning the jets of air that follow my will into loose drills that pounded through rock and flesh alike. This was just the breath of the wind god, and still wasn't the full potential of fujin - even if I could pull it off here, I'd leave the entire subterranean system as a gaping scar on the earth.

So far, all the ninja trying to get close to me have been thrown backwards into the rough stone walls. The lucky ones, anyways. The unlucky ones were ripped in half and deposited in different places. The bad news was that even using the technique for a minute had drained my chakra pool down to almost nothing - if I didn't tap into the fox's power soon, I'd collapse from exhaustion.

And, on that note, I get blindsided by a wave of lava on one side and spears of ice on the other. Yes, that's a bone lance coming at me from the front, and laser like jets of water coming from behind. The upside to this is I think I finally know what's going on here. The downside is the fox just pushed out a tail of chakra and by the reactions of the ninja attacking me, things are about to get a lot worse. I knew I should have just snuck in.

* * *

A/N: So, the main part of this arc has begun. I'm sure a few of you can guess what's going on, but what comes next should be a surprise. Anyways, this is a longer chapter again, and we're trying to keep future chapters around or exceeding this length. We hope you like the chapter!

Review please! Tell us what you thought - what you liked, didn't like, want to see more of etc. Also, feel free to pick any three of the Seven Swordsman excluding Zabuza. We have something planned, but it's a secret!


	15. How to Conduct a Successful Interview

A wave of lava on my left, a hailstorm of ice to the right. Behind me are shafts of water, and coming straight at me is a massive spear of bone. If I jump upwards, I become a sitting duck for every ninja around me. I don't any ability to dive underground - the moment I drop the corruscating winds around me I'll be ripped to shreds. At this age, and with the lack of control I have over the Kyuubi's chakra, continued usage of the fox's shroud will burn me alive from the inside. My only chance is to do something they don't expect. Something insane.

Something like diving headfirst into the wall of lava. All things considered, as crazy as it looks, it's really the safest path. Any other direction would leave me open for the other three attacks to hit me - my taking this head on, I force the lava behind me to act as my shield. This burns the last of my chakra, and as the red cloak around me dissipates, I see an elderly woman with red strands in her white hair. She is looking at me sternly, but she makes no further move to attack. No surprise why. If I look as bad as I feel, I probably burned off all of my skin. As I pitch forward and the world fades to black, I can't help but think that something in her looks familiar.

* * *

Terumi Ringo was the current head of the Terumi clan. Along with Kaguya Chinori, Yuki Suno, and Hozuki Funshutsu, she sat on the ruling council of New Kiri. In simpler terms, they four led the fight against the bloodline persecution. In terms of numbers, they were significantly weaker than the main village of Kiri, but they fought wholeheartedly and used their inherited skills to the fullest. The most dangerous factor of their plans was the possible interference of the Seven Swordsmen - defying all odds, the group had split in half, with three coming to the rebel's side, and three remaining loyal to Yagura, the Fourth Mizukage. Zabuza, always disdainful of politics, had chosen a position of neutrality; he slaughtered both sides indiscriminately, and left alone anyone who didn't get in his way. His rival amongst the swordsmen, Kisame, the monstrous wielder of Samehada, stayed with Kiri. With him was also Munashi Jinpachi, user of the blastsword Shibuki, and the biggest threat in the village outside of the Mizukage himself - Hozuki Mangetsu, who turned against his clan and fought with the giant blade Hiramekarei. The group members on the side of the rebellion were Ringo Ameyuri, master of the lightning fangs Kiba; Akebino Jinin, capable of smashing any defense with the hammer and axe combination of Kabutowari, the helmet splitter; and finally the bloodthirsty wielder of the sewing needle Nuibari, Kuriarare Kushimaru.

Overall, the two sides were evenly matched - without the direct interference of Yagura, jinchuuriki for the Sanbi. If the three tailed turtle was loosed on the rebels, they were doomed - little could stop a rampaging jinchuuriki aside from another of the kind, or a powerful s-rank ninja. Unfortunately, those were difficult to come by - the three swordsmen they had were good, but Yagura was better. In an effort to limit his movements, they had turned to indirect attacks that required his direct attention to remedy. Disrupting communications was a risk, but it was worth it to keep other countries in the dark about Kiri's civil war. They had received word from a spy in the administrative building in Kiri that a message from Konoha was expected soon; just as all the other times this had occurred, they waited for the message handoff to occur before Kushimaru swept in and finished the Kiri-nin. They had no desire to antagonize Konoha, and thus left the konoha-nin untouched and unaware of anything that happened. This time, however, it seemed that the messenger from Konoha had decided to follow along and came across their hideout. Even worse, the child was apparently a jinchuuriki himself - and the only possible candidate for the biju was the nine tailed fox.

The assorted clan heads were of different minds of what to do with him. Chinori wanted to kill him and be done with it, an idea that was unanimously shot down. The rebellion could not afford to bring down the wrath of Konoha - memories among ninja ran long, and some still remembered the fury of the God of Ninja when he descended upon Kiri, furious over the bloody torture of a team of genin in the opening years of the Third War. With him had come Shimura Danzo, the man responsible for crippling Kiri's black ops programs. Together, the two cut a swathe of destruction that almost equaled the Fourth Hokage's decimation of Iwa - Ringo herself had been there, and had seen the destruction first hand. Funshutsu's idea was of a more reasonable sort. The Hozuki leader suggested drugging the container and restraining him in a reinforced tank their clan possessed. The most moderate idea came from Suno, something that did not surprise Ringo at all. The Yuki head had always had a soft spot for children, probably arising from her inability to have any of her own. She had asked that they simply let him leave and request that he return to Konoha and cast the revolution in a positive light - as every jinchuuriki had some kind of connection with the reigning Kage, a policy that arose as a way to control them, she was sure that their words would reach the needed ears. Ringo agreed, in theory. In all practicality, however, she knew that the leaders of Konoha were not likely to freely give aid to a rebellion against a great village. No, her plan was more devious, and held the potential for giving the rebellion a trump card of sorts - it was just as likely to backfire horribly, but she would keep that fact to herself.

* * *

My first impression upon waking up was that my skin hurt. Everywhere. My second impression was that someone was healing me, and I was tied down. After that, I went into full alert - judging by the absolute lack of air movement coupled with a smell of earth and stale water, I was in some sort of underground area. The spotty lighting, as seen through my closed eyelids, suggested a location that was not a permanent installation. The hands treating me were neither gentle or overly harsh - not an enemy, but not someone who has my well being as a priority. They know what they were doing, however, and that meant that I was with an organized group of ninja. Outside of Tsunade, few medic-nin have the courage to travel alone. The last thing I remember is an aging red haired woman - ah, shit, I know why she looks familiar. She's definitely Mei's grandmother. I'd only seen her in pictures, but the family resemblance is strong.

In that case, I've ended up walking right into the headquarters of the first Kiri rebellion, a revolution against the tyrannical policies of the reigning Mizukage - a revolution doomed to fail. From what little I gathered from Mei when she reminisced about her childhood, Yagura would lead a direct attack on their main base himself, with the end result shattering Kiri's clans almost to the point of no return. Wonderful. Here I am, captured by a group of people who probably want to kill me, and who are themselves under the imminent threat of attack by a jinchuuriki. Trust me, and I speak from experience here, there tends to be a lot of collateral damage when one of us goes full blast. Not much tends to remain around ground zero. Even worse, Yagura was one of the first to be able to manifest the biju's body - he couldn't control it, but the Sanbi was uniquely suited for battle in Kiri's watery environment. If I was even ten years older, I could handle the three tailed biju with relative ease. Since I'm not, I might as well curl up and resign myself to death. Maybe I should just refuse the mission out of hand, next time. Wait, never mind, the game saved after I had already accepted it. Failing it is an option, or just handing over the message and getting the hell of the island.

A woman's voice comes from a space behind and to the left of my head. "Jinchuuriki, I know you are awake. Your kind is rarely down for long, and not by this level of injury."

Oh, shut up. What would you know about being a container for a demon? Wait - whoever this is has some serious skills. Her voice came from maybe three feet away, and I had no idea that there was anyone else nearby. No, wait. I can't feel a thing, actually. I tense my wrists, and feel the shackles that bind me. Damn, they really went all out.

Her dry voice rasps out again. "I see you have discovered the chakra limiters that bind you. I am fully aware that they are insufficient to imprison the power of a biju, but let me warn you - one false move and you will be burned alive. From what I hear, it is not a pleasant experience."

Tell me about it. I've had that experience more times than I want to remember. Ugh. I crack my eyes open, and fight the urge to cry as the bright lights burn my retinas. When I finally adapt to my surroundings, I take a quick look around before turning my attention up to the speaker. The room I'm in is irregularly hewn from solid rock, with a heavy iron door sealing the entrance. There was a young man working on my injuries, currently finishing the patch job I did on healing my cracked ribs, and there was nothing really special about him. Steady hands, good control, a rather stoic expression; no one vitally important to the rebellion, yet still skilled enough to treat me. The woman above me was a different story. Her shoulder length hair had gone mostly white, outside of a few strands that remained a vibrant red. She was probably around forty or fifty years old, with the beginnings of wrinkles setting in, but she had an intensity about her belied her age. Her blue eyes were striking, or at least one was - the other was surrounded by a starburst scar and had clouded gray. She noticed my gaze and chuckled grimly.

"Found my souvenir, have you?" She is silent for a moment, as she lightly traces the edge of the disfigurement with her index finger. She resumes speaking abruptly. "Your Hokage gave it to me, you know. It was probably the closest I have ever gotten to death. He certainly left me for dead, and I do not blame him. It is rare that someone can live on after a kunai penetrates their skull. You understand, of course, why we would be less than eager to invite the return of the God of Ninja, especially under such inauspicious circumstances." She moved to the right, circling until I could see her fully. She crossed her arms and leaned closer to me as I lay bound to a table. "Still, we cannot simply release you, not after you killed several of our ninja."

She straightens and shrugs. "We could certainly try and keep you imprisoned until the end of this conflict, but I had a more interesting idea. How would you like to take a job?"

Huh. I think I can see where she's going with this. Interesting - I can see why she is the leader of the rebellion. Mei certainly inherited more than just her looks. "Unfortunately, I happen to have a mission of my own to complete." I see her stance tighten and all emotions disappear from her visage. "Still, I see no reason why my mission cannot dovetail with yours - after all, I was never instructed on how to hand over the scroll in the case of a situation like this. As the highest ranking ninja from Konoha in the area, I could make a call to stretch mission parameters slightly."

She guffaws and fixes me with her steely gaze, though I can glimpse little flashes of humor as well. "Tell me, Konoha-nin, how old are you really?"

I smile in return. "Why, I'm merely your average six year old genin.

This time, we both laugh.

* * *

A/N: Well, here's another chapter. Not really as action packed, but it does hint at what's going to come in the future. The next chapter will be a good deal longer, and will have a larger cast of characters as well. Hope you guys find this chapter okay.

Review Please!


	16. And Then There Were None

Uchiha Itachi stood at the edge of the Land of Fire, looking out over the sea. He was not quite worried, but he was quickly approaching concerned. It had been three weeks since his student had accepted a mission to Kiri, and he had not crossed the genin's return path. Granted, his own mission had taken more time to resolve that he had thought it would, seeing as it concerned delicate diplomatic issues with the Land of Tea. It was more than possible that Uzumaki had simply returned to Konoha before he had. Regardless, it wouldn't hurt to check - if anything happened to the container of the Kyuubi, the subsequent release of the biju would alert the entire continent. Yes, he would head to Konoha first. If his student had not returned, then he would consider what to do next.

* * *

I've been receiving a lot of dirty looks lately. Unlike the usual set I get from the civilians of Konoha, these I deserve. After all, I basically got off with a slap on the wrist, even after forcing my way into the main refuge of the rebellion, and then killing a good handful of their ninja. The upside to the whole situation was that that short segment of battle had netted me some major experience points - some of the killed had to be jonin. I jumped seven levels in one go - the boost to my basic parameters is, quite frankly, ridiculous.

"**Stats**, and **skills**."

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 63**

**CONSTITUTION - 86**

**DEXTERITY - 49**

**INTELLIGENCE - 59**

**WISDOM - 79**

**CHARISMA - 113**

**SPEED - 37**

**CHAKRA: 1148**

**CHAKRA CONTROL: *X2**

**SKILLS:**

**BODY**

**- ADVANCED CHAKRA CONTROL (1/1)**

**MIND**

**- KNOWLEDGE IS POWER (3/3)**

**- - EYE OF THE MIND (1/10)**

**SPECIAL**

**- HEAR MY ROAR (9/9)**

**- - TO CHAIN THE BEAST (5/45)**

**CLASS**

**- RAIN OF FIRE (1/1)**

**- RAM (1/1)**

It turns out that maxing out** hear my roar** has the side effect of doubling my chakra once again. As I received another** class point** at level twenty, I placed that in the next most useful ability for me, **ram**. It should let me break through defenses without my having to resort to my higher tier techniques - I also have the faint suspicion that passive bonuses stack, meaning that both** rain of fire** and **ram** can come into effect at the same time. Most important, however, is the skill that was unlocked after I completed the first special skill.** To chain the beast** allows me to control a portion of the Kyuubi's chakra, the amount depending on the number of points in the skill. One points gives me control of one tail, two more points on top of that gives me control over two tails, and so on. One more point would give me as much access to a biju's chakra as Yagura could summon at his maximum. In theory, that means that I could restrain the Sanbi if it was manifested in a berserk state. In practice, I'd probably just be able to slow it down. Sometimes it sucks being six - trying to use that much chakra in a body this young would burn out the tenketsu and coils of my chakra system.

As it stood, I'm going to be needing that third tail very soon - the conditions for allowing me to live are that I take Yagura out of the fighting if he appears. Well, that's what they told me, but I know better. They really can't afford to kill me, and Ringo had openly told me why. Ringo - she reminds me so much of who Mei would grow into that sometimes it hurts to talk to her and be reminded of the people I have lost over the years. Regardless, I have my own agenda for agreeing with the rebellion. I know that Yagura has been under the influence of Obito's Sharingan for years, and there was probably little, if anything, left of his mind at this point. It simply wouldn't be safe leaving a biju in the possession of an unstable madman who was useless without semi-constant directions. It would be safer for everyone concerned if the Sanbi was forced to disperse and recuperate in the wild.

As I think, I walk through the network of passages that make up the headquarters. The large cavern that I broke into originally was the main staging ground, the only place large enough to hold all the combat capable ninja of the rebels. From what I've picked up around the base, there seems to be another, smaller yet more hidden, area that held the young and the non-combatants. I grimace - in my past, everyone here had died, leaving the young alone to fight a losing battle against the Mist, one that would last for years until the revolution finally defeated a drastically weakened Kiri. I would rather not see that happen. There were only a few pillars that constituted the majority of New Kiri's combat power - the strongest of the clans, and the three renegade swordsmen. I -

A rumble shakes the earth, causing to dirt to fall from the ceiling of the tunnel. I frown; that was no localized tremor, as in the case of training, nor was it consistent with the patterns of a natural earthquake. A second rumble shakes the tunnel again. This time, small crack begin to appear in the walls. My eyes widen, and I dash forward to make my way to a larger area. This was no natural occurrence - this felt closer to the aftershocks from a multitude of exploding tags being detonated in close proximity. No one would set large quantities of tags off inside a cave, leaving the only alternative an attack from the surface. A third tremor shakes the earth, and the path below my feet feels much less solid than it did mere moments ago. I need to get out of here before the entire tunnel collapses on top of me.

* * *

Terumi Ringo was old - she could feel it in her bones, and she knew she was slowing down. However, she was also the most powerful ninja that New Kiri had on its side, and she could not afford to give up just yet. As an explosion rocked the complex yet again, she tightened her grip on her tanto, a gift from her deceased daughter years ago. It was time to ride the battlefield once more, and remind the ninja of Kiri to respect their elders.

She glanced back at the assembled ninja, and smiled sadly. Odds were good that many of them would not live to see the next day. The cavern shook again, and she turned her focus back to the entrance that Naruto had come through just one week ago. That child - no, he was no child, for all that his appearance said otherwise. He was old and experienced; she had no idea how or why such an old soul was trapped in a child's body, but it was not her place to ask. Ah, the irony of the future of New Kiri depending upon a foreign child. The wall of the cavern across from her exploded, and a man stepped into view, hefting a massive sword above his shoulders. His hair was tied in strands bound by small beads, and under his Kiri headband, an eyepatch concealed his left eye. Ringo had guessed correctly - the caverns had been cracked open like an egg under the indiscriminate power of Shibuki, wielded by the inhumane Jinpachi. The scroll of explosive tags attached to the blade rotated and readied for another blast.

Before Kiri ninja could begin to pour in through the gap in the wall, Ringo flashed through a set of handseals, taking a deep breath and then spewing forth a torrent of molten rock, creating a nearly impassable barrier between the invaders and the defenders. Seconds later, streams of water from many sources shot out from the mass of Kiri-nin, solidifying the lava and cooling it enough for passage. She cursed under her breath - the enemy had been prepared to counter her bloodline, which meant that the battle just became a great deal more difficult.

* * *

Yuki Suno was one of only a handful of Yuki clan members whose bloodline was of a level that allowed for direct usage in battle. Coupled with her mastery of one handed seals, she was amongst the stronger ninja in New Kiri. As a peaceful soul, however, she was hurt by the necessity of such senseless battle between the citizens of the same land; at the same time, there was no way that she would allow the clans of Kiri, especially the children, to be killed for something that they were born with. She was glad that her younger sister had married and settled on one of the surrounding islands - it was a shame that Suno would probably never see her niece again. She was such a nice girl, always trying to help as much as she could. Her face tightened, then blanked, as she repressed her feelings of sorrow. Using the skills passed down in her clan, both her hands sped through separate jutsu, coating the inside of the cavern in a vast mirror of ice, and cooling the water in the air surrounding her until it was as if she stood in the center of a localized snowstorm. As she jumped into the mirror and reappeared on the other side of the cavern, she looked like a marble statue, dealing death all around her without care for the lives she cut short.

* * *

Blood flew through the air like rain as blades of bone tore through yet another body. The white haired man pulled his arms to the side, the lengths of bone protruding from his forearms tearing into the ninja on either side of their dead companion. As a dragon of water charged down towards him, he roared in return, shooting his teeth out like arrows from a bow. As his mouth emptied, a new set formed and was ready to fire once again. Kaguya Chinori was having the time of his life - never before had he fought so hard, or killed so many. He reveled in the blood and gore around him, slaughtering his enemies in the most violent manner possible. His unceasing charge was abruptly halted as his twin blades of bone crashed into blade wrapped in bandages, carried by a ninja with blue skin, one who looked more shark than human.

* * *

"So, we come to this. You forsake your clan, your very blood, and side with the man who seeks to eliminate us all." Hozuki Funshutsu knew that his time had come - Mangetsu was the most talented ninja his clan had produced in generations. Against the leader of the Seven Swordsmen, a single, tired old man had no hope of winning. That was fine with him - he had no desire to win anyways. It was a poor world where family fought family, but if he could prevent his son from killing his comrades, he would do his best. It was probably a good thing that his idea for dealing with the Kyuubi jinchuuriki was not used.

Mangetsu was silent, not that Funshutsu really expected an answer. Staring down the blade of his oldest son, the despairing father called on the full extent of his chakra, drawing the water from deep in the ground to coat his body. The Armour of the Morning Dew was a secret passed down only to the heads of the clan, with good reason - the effects of the technique were irreversible. His body liquefied and scattered, turning into countless shimmering drops of water that streamed through the chaos. Each drop shone with a brilliant light and began to move faster and faster, illuminating the entire cavern and forming a cage that surrounded the wielder of Hiramekarei, closing in on him in a tightening spiral. Mangetsu tried to break free, but his blade merely passed through the drops without effect, as did all of his jutsu. No matter where he ran, the cage followed him inexorably, until it finally clamped down upon him, sealing him in an airtight barrier that was bound to his skin. Before he could react, Mangetsu felt his body being forced into its liquid state and the sphere of water that contained father and son sped off the battlefield and lower into the caves, until it reached a tall glass cylinder that stood alone in a reinforced room in the lowest level of the base. The globe flowed into the cylinder, and it sealed, imprisoning the son. The father's chakra dwindled rapidly, but his final thoughts were of happiness, for he had prevented the murder of his family by another member.

* * *

Another blast rocked the cavern as Munashi Jinpachi smashed his way through the hardened lava created by the old has-been. The bitch just didn't know when to give up, but she'd be dead soon enough anyways. There was nothing that had survived a direct blow from his sword, and she would be destroyed by it, just as his own brother was. Oh yes, he could see it now - his sword would swing down, and she would try to block it, probably with one of those lava techniques. The resulting blast would tear her into shreds, which would rain down upon the land - oh yes, he couldn't wait. She wasn't even moving either, just standing there waiting for him. What a shame, it's no fun if the prey gives up before the hunt even begins. Whatever, there was no shortage of raw material for his fun today. He ran his tongue over his sharpened teeth; today would be a great day.

Swinging his blade by the handle, he taunted the woman. "Aww, are you scared? Ha! Old women have no place on the field - go back home and watch your children. Oh, I'm sorry, are they dead? That's right! I completely forgot that I killed them. Your daughter and her husband, wasn't it? Not much of a challenge really, and they didn't explode very well either. Why don't we see if you do any better?"

With a scream of rage, the matriarch of the Terumi clan charged towards him, swinging a tanto as she came. He chuckled and smashed his blade into hers, watching in glee as her arm shattered and she exploded. The blast sent pieces of her body flying, accompanied by streams of lava. Wild laughter rang us he watched the foolish rebels turn to her body, or what was left of it, in despair.

A slim blade slipped through his back and penetrated his chest, sliding between his upper ribs and piercing his heart on the way. He froze and blood gurgled out of his lips. As he sank to the floor, he caught a glimpse of white hair, framing a face that he was sure had just died.

Ringo pulled her tanto from the dying man's back, shaking the blood off of it as she did so. She knelt down to whisper in his ear. "I guess I did better, hmm? Don't underestimate the old, for age and treachery will always overcome youth and enthusiasm. Go to hell, you monster." She straightened up, looking at the remnants of her lava clone with a small smile, before she leapt back into the fray.

* * *

Blood, blood, everywhere. So much blood! No - he needed more, more, more! Kuriarare Kushimaru thrust Nuibari through yet another ninja, dashing past and searching out another target for his stitching. Ah, such a grand tapestry this battle was! As the man he had impaled struggled to remove the trailing wire from the blade, Kushimaru had already circled around him, stringing several more Kiri-nin onto his thread. He impaled ninja over and over again, from all sorts of angles, leaving them alive yet bound by the near unbreakable metal string extending from the oversized sewing needle. A small fireball flew at him, made practically useless by the concentration of water in the air, and he rolled forward, throwing his blade in retaliation as he hit the ground. As he sprung back to his feet, his wild mane flying everywhere, the needle had already pierced through the offending ninja, as well as three or more men behind him. Kushimaru grasped the trailing wire and gave it a pull, catching Nuibari as it flew back to his hand. As he finished with a flourish, all of the ninja he had impaled had been pulled together into a massive bundle of flesh. Oops, looks like he made a mistake - one of the last ones had been a woman that was part of New Kiri. Oh well, too bad for her; as he pulled the wire through his creation, dicing those caught in the ball, he mused on the fact that blood was blood, no matter whose it was. He licked a spatter that had fallen near his mouth and absentmindedly stabbed a ninja that was trying to sneak up on him. If he had been paying more attention, he may have noticed the reams of explosive tags under the dead man's flak jacket; after the detonation of the tags, there wasn't enough of him left to notice anything anyways.

* * *

Akebino Jinin was having the time of his life, crushing the bodies of the ninja who stood against him. His axe split other blades in half, and his hammer simply crushed the enemy into paste. Water jutsu were shattered by the force of his swings, as were most techniques, to be honest, and though he was slow, he was an unstoppable force moving through the battlefield. Unlike his blood thirsty companion, Kushimaru, Jinin did not take pleasure in dealing death. No, his joy came from absolutely destroying all defenses, and watching the hopes of his enemies turn to dust. Three ninja in the distance, bearing the armband of the Kiri Barrier Squad, were unrolling a set of scrolls. A hazy blue barrier sprung up around them, and the center scroll began to glow. Jinin roared a challenge and smashed his way through the raging battles around him.

Enemy ninja swarmed him from all directions, dying like flies under the crushing power of his blades, yet managing to slow him down by the sheer weight of their bodies. By the time he managed to make his way through the press and reached the barrier, the scroll was emitting a harsh blue light and fiercely crackling with repressed power. Jinin slammed the axe half of his blade into the blue mist. It sank through about an inch, then stopped cold. He smiled - finally, here was an obstacle worthy of his full strength. Hefting his hammer in his other hand, he smashed the head into the blunt side of the axe, using it as a wedge to force his way through the barrier. The axe sank another inch then stopped. He roared in glee again, and began to swing his hammer like a machine. Down it pounded, every stroke forcing the blade of the axe closer to the three ninja taking refuge behind the blue wall. Sweat poured down their faces as they worked at a feverish pace to finish charging the weapon they had prepared. Within a minute, however, there was a horrendous crack that echoed throughout the cave. Jinin's axe shattered the barrier and cleaved through the head of one of the barrier-nin, continuing into the scroll itself. There was an enormous boom and a brilliant bolt of blue lightning arced through the cavern, immolating both those who tried to summon it, and he who unleashed it.

* * *

At the same time as her colleague had spotted the barrier going up, Ringo Ameyuri had just finished decimating yet another group of ninja. Out of all the three swordsmen who had defected to New Kiri, she was the only one who truly believed in the cause she was fighting for. Maybe it was because she was used to discrimination headed her way, due to her status as the sole female member of the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist. Maybe it was the attraction she felt towards the head of the Yuki clan. It didn't matter - her blades cut through flesh and steel alike, and her mastery of lightning brought all of her enemies low. As she raised her blades to gather power for a large scale technique, there was an echoing crack and then a feeling of fire rushing through her nerves. As her vision faded and she began to lapse into unconsciousness, she directed the excess energy from the blast of blue lightning into the roof of the cavern, vaporizing it and opening the battle to the outside air.

* * *

Unknown to Ameyuri, her feelings were reciprocated by the target of her affections. Yuki Suno had already exhausted a large part of her chakra in creating the massive demonic mirror above the battle, and had darted back and forth picking out targets before they could cause damage. It was ironic that the the most peaceful of the fighting ninja had the highest kill count, but she had already killed her heart - or so she thought. When she saw the woman she loved fall, her heart, frozen as she thought it was, broke in two. Using the rest of her chakra, she fell to her beloved's side and froze the land around her, sealing enemy and ally alike into a deep sleep. As she lay her head down, frozen tears dripped from her face and littered the ground around Ameyuri's head like diamonds. As the temperature dropped even lower, she, too, fell into a deep sleep.

* * *

The clash of blades rang out without end. Around the dueling swordsmen, there was a ring of cleared ground where no one trespassed - to do so was to invite an instant death. As bones parried the scales of a shark, their wielders were full of joy, for this was a battle unlike any they would ever have again. Two swordsmen, forsaking jutsu, forgetting their purpose, ignoring the rest of the world around them, bound in a brutal battle to the end. No words were exchanged, for none were needed. Samehada swung down like an avalanche, only to be deflected by a bone harder than any found in nature. A second blade of bone swung horizontally, sending up a spray of blood. The cut was shallow, however, and Samehada returned the favor with a blow to the leg, shredding the muscle and skin underneath but grinding off of the bone. There was no pause in the battle, no moment to catch a breath - the first to stop would be the first to die. Two monsters clashed again and again, each wounding the other, each pressing forward. A bone snapped, only to be replaced by another. One by one, Samehada's wielder began to pick up an array of wounds, ranging from thin slices to piercing gouges. The white of the bones was dyed red, as was the ground below their feet, yet they raged on. It was single misstep that ended the battle - as a wave of frost swept across the field, blood froze and slowed down the blue giant. Twin blades of bone were quick to capitalize, plunging deep into their enemy. Yet even this was not enough; Samehada swung down and crushed through a skull, burying itself in the upper rib cage.

Kisame staggered away from the battle, never looking back as the body of his most fearsome opponent fell to the ground, never to rise.

* * *

Ringo leapt onto a ledge of rock and surveyed the battle. Things were not progressing well - though the ninja of New Kiri were killing more of the enemy than they had lost, they were steadily being pushed back. Portions of the battleground had changed dramatically - one area had been frozen solid, and another had been slagged, leaving a sheet of black glass where there was once solid rock. She herself had pushed back the enemy in multiple locations, but each time she left, her gains would be nullified. As it was, there were few powerful ninja left - with the fall of the heads of the Kaguya, Hozuki, and Yuki clans, she was the last leader of the rebellion. Only she could order a retreat. She snorted. Retreat? There could be no retreat, for they would be hunted down like dogs, slowly killed one by one until there were none left. No, their only hope was to kill as many ninja here as possible, so as to give their children a fighting chance in the future.

She saw Kisame rise, wounded but still capable of fighting, and mused on her options. Any large scale attack she used would kill as many of her own subordinates as it would the enemy; with Kisame at large, any technique she used could also be countered by an equivalent technique of water. The two would effectively remove each other from battle, as whatever one did could be countered by the other. No - Ringo hesitated and thought further. Not everything. A grim chuckle accompanied a long series of handseals - the Hozuki clan did not have a monopoly on body transformation.

* * *

For the first time that he could remember, Kisame was tired. To tell the truth, he was exhausted. He, often called the biju without a tail, thought he knew now what it was that lesser ninja faced, and he hated it. As Samehada shredded ninja after ninja, feeding their chakra back to him and slowly healing his wounds, he thought of facing his rival in this state. Though he would not openly admit it, he knew he would lose - the Kaguya had been a worthy adversary, and one that he would remember for quite some time. He stepped forward, greatsword arcing towards a water ninjutsu, absorbing the chakra that bound it together, he felt a warning from his sword, around the same time a scorching heat appeared behind him. He turned slowly, and stood face to face with the leader of the rebellion, the Goddess of Fire. It was a great irony, having the greatest master of fire techniques in the Land of Water, but it was true, and she stood in front of him, with a body made of burning magma.

"To see your Heart of the Mountain so soon - this is indeed an honor, Terumi Ringo." He meant that sincerely, for all ninja of his generation held the venerated elder in awe, as she was the only surviving ninja in Kiri who had gone toe to toe with the God of Ninja and survived. She had lost of course, but that was no shame - it would have been like trying to fight the ocean and win. He stared his death in the eye and prepared for the last battle of his life. Samehada could only drain so much of that chakra before he himself had been turned to ash, and no water technique under his belt could so much as dent the being that stood before him. He could feel his lips curling as he prepared - win or lose, live or die, all he lived for was the next fight, and this could be the greatest of them all.

* * *

Ringo sighed as she let her control of her technique fall. Defeating Kisame was truly a challenge, and at the end, she let him escape. She had nothing left to chase him with, anyways - one of the perils of becoming old, she guessed. Still, the battle had sung in favor of New Kiri, and the enemy ninja were being pushed out of the caverns. She drew her tanto once more, ready to do her part in ridding her new home of the invaders, only to freeze. The newly drawn blade slipped from nerveless fingers, and for the first time in the fight, Ringo knew despair. Standing at the entrance to caves was a slim man holding a hooked staff.

****Yagura had come.

* * *

A/N: Dun dun dun. Here comes the climax of this arc. Everything so far has simply been a warmup - the chapter should be interesting, to say the least.

On that note, we hope you like this chapter - I was sick, so yes I had time to write, but the quality may have suffered.

Review, and let us know what you thought!


	17. Bad Turtle

Alright, whoever constructed this damn tunnel needs to be rounded up and stabbed. Multiple times. Preferably with a rusty spoon, but at a pinch, a heated kunai would do just as well. Maybe twenty seconds into the series of explosions, and the entire things collapses on my head. I manage to clear myself a little space as the ceiling comes down on me, but that leaves me with hundreds of feet of rock to dig through - and I'm not even sure which direction to go. Oh well, better get digging. I pull out a pair of kunai - probably the most useful tool any ninja can have - and start tunneling through the wall in front of me.

* * *

Yagura. By looks alone, there was nothing special about him. In fact, his youthful features made many think of him as a child. No one who had met him, however, thought of him as anything other than what he was - a monster in human flesh. Ringo could remember a time, many years ago, when he was just a boy. She was one of the few, however - it was shortly after he became a ninja that the transformation occurred. Ever since, he had become cruel and unfeeling, not to mention paranoid. Having full control of his beast placed him in the upper echelon of ninja, just by his sheer power, but his lack of skill left him wary of those who could defeat him. Twenty years ago, before the war, Ringo herself was one of those - now, there were none in Kiri who could challenge him and win definitively. There had been some, but Yagura's bloodline purges had killed them all - it was thought by some that their deaths had been the impetus for the purges in the first place.

Ringo did not really care why the Mizukage decided that bloodlines were the sign of evil; all that mattered to her was that her family, and those of others, were being slaughtered. It was for this reason that she had banded together with several other clans, recruiting all sympathetic ninja as well. Many clans had chosen to flee instead, for it was rare that a clan would have a large number of competent ninja. Bloodlines gave an extra tool to a ninja, true, but they did not inherently make a great warrior. Ringo did not grudge them their choice, and instead ensured that their flights were as unmolested as possible. Quite a few of her own clan members had lost their lives by helping another clan escape the tyranny of the bloody mist, but they all died confident that their actions had helped change the world. How could she, who was old when many of the fallen were mere children, choose to do any less. Yagura would finish her, no doubt, but doing so would take him a few precious minutes. In that time, the rest of the rebels could flee - better that one die for the many, than for the total destruction of New Kiri.

She looked at her opponent, and made ready to call on her trump card once more. The Mizukage just stood there, uncaring of the battles that raged around him. The arrogant man had not even called upon his biju yet - an opportunity that she could not afford to miss. It was now or nev -

"Hey, I'm assuming that all the fighting here means that this is the right place." A cheery, high pitched voice cut through the dull roar of the background, bringing nearly all movement in the cavern to a screeching halt.

Ringo closed her eyes and sighed, relaxing her stance as she did so. She swore that he did this just to annoy her - maybe she should have stopped with the marriage offers between him and her granddaughter after the time he blew up a tree when he said no. Nah, the brat was just acting up. Still - she had to hide a smile at the appearance of the blond. Finally, there was someone who could hold off Yagura's sheer power - though she didn't think he could win, the two jinchuuriki would effectively remove themselves from the battle.

Actually, come to think of it, now would be a good time to discreetly signal a retreat, while there was still a mountain to run away from.

* * *

"Hey, I'm not late, am I?" Alright, I admit it. I got a little lost on the way here - just a little bit, mind you, but I intended to get here in time to actually contribute. Right now, it looks more like cleanup time. Most of the heavy hitters are either dead or neutralized, and those left are on the lower end of the ladder. That, or they were just really good at hiding, but there weren't many of those. I take a few steps away from the hole I dug through the wall and step into something squishy. Oh, look, someone's lost their mind - literally. I have to say, stepping on someone's brain is rather annoying. Cleaning all the stains off your sandals is quite a chore, especially if they get a chance to dry. A few more steps brings me to a pair of ninja at a deadlock, both hands on each other's throats. Oddly enough, they're both staring at me and standing completely still.

"You guys mind pointing me towards the biggest threat here?" The simultaneous flinch from both of them is unexpected, but they both raise their hand and point at a spot over my head and to the left. I take a look and see a kid with a staff taller than he is. I look back at the two and then realize who I just saw.

"Oh, so Yagura's here! Great, looks like I'm not late after all. Thanks, you two." I pat them on the shoulder and walk towards my target, ignoring the twin whimpers and thuds that come from behind me. Odd. I continue walk forward, my twin tails swishing behind me, absently noting how every ninja in my path seems to find a reason to get very far away.

* * *

There were few things Yagura feared, thought Yagura. Among them were the dark man, the old man, and the salamander. Yagura thought for a moment. Yagura smiled and bopped his palm with his hand. That's right, Yagura was scared of the six tailed one as well. Yagura smiled, feeling proud of Yagura. Oh, Yagura saw a blond with red tails coming at him. Yagura thought that Yagura should kill him. How should Yagura kill him? Well, Yagura could grind his bones to dust, eat his sinew, boil him alive, rip out his eyes and pickle them, cut his -

A tremendous blow slammed into Yagura, sending him flying. About time, too. Listening to his monologue was starting to get annoying.

* * *

Okay, I can see why A and B trained so hard to use the lariat. Even with the two tailed cloak going, the backlash from that attack almost tore my own arm off. On the plus side, I sent Yagura through the upper wall of the cave. I wonder where all that ice on the ceiling came from, anyways. Following him up and out, I land on the slope of the mountain, whipping my tails into the rock to anchor myself. I've fought a lot of jinchuurikis over the years, and each one has been a pain in their own way. As the number of tails increases, the raw power goes at their disposal goes up exponentially - on the flip side of things, the biju with fewer tails conferred upon their hosts some kind of unique ability. The sanbi, as I recall, had control over bodies of water, as well as the ability to rapidly grow coral and use it for different techniques. There was something else there, too, but I can't remember what it is. Eh, it probably isn't very important, then.

Ah, he's up. He's talking to himself, but that's about par for the course as far as most jinchuuriki go. Insanity tends to come with the job. I was somewhat lucky in my original childhood, since my father stripped away the Kyuubi's mental energies and just left me with the physical. Sure, it had an effect on my body, but being an Uzumaki neutralized most the negative issues. So, unlike pretty much all other jinchuuriki, I know for a fact that my mind is all my own. Still, this guy's problem seems to be worse than most. He's talking to himself, and referring to himself in third person. I've never actually met him before, so I'm just guessing here, but based on what I do know about his circumstances, I'd say that his mind has been forcibly melded with his biju's. Not exactly pleasant, but it would probably make full manifestation of the three tailed turtle a lot easier for him. Well, no time to waste wondering about useless things - I'm going have to stall him for as long as possible.

I dart forward, my speed greatly enhanced by the two tails of the Kyuubi's chakra that I was sporting. Yagura was just getting up, and my fists slam into him again. As he goes flying down the mountainside, I shoot past him and turn to face his back. As he comes within range, I grab the loose side of his green tunic and pull him into my knee. As he folds over backwards, I rotate my hips and throw him into an rocky protrusion, shattering it and sending up clouds of dust. I close again, but get coldcocked when the butt end of a staff slams into my forehead. Thank god for the invention of the metal forehead protector. As I roll backwards, I bring my hands up and speed through several seals - most of the jutsu that I know may be on the weaker side, but they also happen to be very easy to overpower. A short blast of wind leaves my palm as I thrust it forwards, pushing me faster down the mountain but hitting the Mizukage with the force of a small wind bullet.

It doesn't keep him down for long, as a stream of water clears a hole through the rising dust and impacts against my arms with the force of a train. I hit the ground, hard, and start bouncing down the rock face, using my tails to latch onto outcroppings and slowing my uncontrolled tumble. I guess it's about time he fights back. Several more jets of water clear the dust from the air entirely, all converging on my former position. I, on the other hand, charge directly at Yagura, speeding up with every step I took, unwinding my flail as I did so. My makeshift metal bracer had been corroded after the one use against that chunin, and I was pretty much out of other tricks. Nothing that would slow a jinchuuriki, anyways. In the end, it comes down to skill and strength - I'm not lacking in one, but he outclasses me in everyway for the other.

As I approach the madman, he spins his staff through convoluted patterns, the ends blurring fasted than I can see. Well, I can spin things too. The metallic string in my hand is slowly released as I rotate my wrist, accelerating the kunai at the end to speeds surpassing that of Yagura's staff. In return, he charges his stave with chakra - it looks like water natured chakra, and seems to be a mix of human and biju - causing it to glow a rippling blue. Damn. Can't match that, not yet anyways, so I guess I lose this pissing contest. At the height of its arc, the kunai abruptly changes direction and hurtles at his head, cutting the air with a whistling noise as it went. The hooked end of his staff knocked the knife of target, but I didn't think it would his him, anyways. A slight movement bring the blade back around, and its diverted once again by his staff.

The combat begins to pick up the pace, as my kunai and his staff connect again and again, filling the air with a ringing thwack of metal on wood. I can't get around his defense - much as I hate to say it, his staff work is near flawless. I honestly can't remember anyone else that I know who could match this level of skill. That's odd in of itself, really, since I don't remember people praising his skills in the past. It's possible that they just chose to forget anything good about him, but when I fought his resurrected form, he barely even used his staff. It's a moot point, anyways, since we've already started trying to kill each other. I bring the kunai back to a stable orbit around me, watching as Yagura continues to work through his form. Everytime that I think I see an opening, the small black blade carves a path heading there. Everytime, as it is deflected, the blade returns to its circle, ready to be cast out again.

Oh, shit. I guess he lost his patience. Bubbling up from behind him is the beginning of a blue-green tail, accompanying a thin layer of chakra that coated his entire body. Time to step up my game. I collect my flail and loosely coil it back around my left arm. Gritting my teeth, I bend his legs and prepare to strike as Yagura ran straight at me and swung the hooked staff at my skull. Only an idiot would try to block that, and I didn't even try. Instead, I jumped and landed onto his arm, swinging my right heel high as I did so. With his boosted strength, my six year old body doesn't even shift his balance, allowing me slam an axe kick into his skull. As he staggers, I flip backwards off his arm while flinging a pair of shuriken at him. One missed, skimming his left shoulder, but the other sliced through his chakra coat. The effect was blunted, true, but the thin line of blood dripping down from his temple reassures me that I could win.

Other than a momentary hesitation,, he doesn't seem to show any effects of the solid blow. At this point in time, I don't really have any serious power behind my moves. I either killed instantaneously, or built up minor damage until my target collapsed. My current enemy was therefore the worst possible matchup for me - much to skilled to be killed in one shot, and too tough to go down to minor injuries. His biju doesn't really hurt either. The blunt end of the staff speared forward, and I pull out a kunai, deflecting the blow down and to the right. He grips the other end of the staff with both hands and drives the staff into me like a bat. There's not much I can do except block with my kunai - I get sent flying and the blade snaps. Talk about shoddy workmanship.

"Alright, fine, this is going to be harder than I thought. Why don't you try some of these!" As I speak, my hand slips into a pouch tied at my lower back, retrieving five kunai that had purloined tags attached to the handles. The rebels had been watching me carefully, but no one really expects a child to be able to steal things out from under their nose. I hurl the blades at the Mizukage, activating them with a pulse of chakra. He knocks them away, easily, but is blown off his feet by the resulting explosion. Now, I know from experience that a few exploding tags won't really do anything through a chakra cloak, not unless the blast is at point blank range, but the dust screen that gets kicked up is what I'm really after. The kunai that I threw are embedded into the rock around us, and I stand tense, waiting for what I anticipate.

To be honest, this battle was over before it had even started. A six year old genin, no matter how skilled, could never hope to compare with a full fledged Kage, one that also hosted the power of a massive beast of chakra. Hell, he was winning even without the chakra cloak, and he still has two tails to go. I prepare for what will come next, bracing myself firmly. The tension in the air is so thick that I could have cut it with a knife. It kept me rooted to the ground, no matter how much I told myself that I had a plan that could even things out. It wasn't fear, terror, or despair. No, those are familiar feelings, and ones that I had conquered decades ago. However, there was something indescribable about facing a jinchuuriki, knowing full well what one was capable of. I could die and still return, but no sane man looks forward to death. I may be a little odd, and I may have come to terms with my mortality years ago, but I certainly wasn't looking to die, especially when I have been granted a second chance at life. I have to be careful. Yagura is not an enemy I can overpower. I cannot fight recklessly. I am not the genin I was a century ago, who was capable of fighting multiple biju at once and winning. I am not the chunin that genin became, the man who walked through the fire of a volcano protected by nothing more than his own, raw chakra. I am not an ascended sage, whose chakra bound the natural world to his every whim. I am not the jonin who ended wars, who was the second man to receive a flee on sight order. I am most certainly not the Sixth Hokage, the man who some called the equal of the Sage who came first.

No, I am a six year old with the mind of an ancient - fighting Yagura evenly isn't evenly possible. A single wrong move could cripple me, and it would be just as easy to die. However, I am a ninja, with all that entails. So I can't win in a straight fight. Fine. I'll just have to cheat. The only way to fight him is to surprise him too quickly for him to react properly, and kill him. Any other course of action would lead to total defeat. On the other hand, he had no miraculous healing factor as I used to. If he was lethally wounded, he would die. Simple as that. It was true for the both of us, really. There would be no miracle to stitch our bodies back together, no demonic chakra to regenerate mauled and ruptured organs or bind shattered bones. If we were injured, we would stay injured. If we were dealt a fatal blow, that was it - we wouldn't be getting back up.

The dust clears, and I see what I had been expecting. Yagura stood unharmed, his staff planted in the ground beside him, his hands clasped together in a seal. Around him, beside him, above him, countless ripples in the air surrounded spheres of water. The container for the master of water had called, and the moisture rich environment of the Mist willingly gave up every last drop of water he required. It is a technique that would eradicate me if it hit - but it was also a severe miscalculation on his part. He does not know what I am capable of. He does not understand that by spreading out his chakra and sucking all the water in the air towards him, what was left around me was simply air, air that had already been primed to respond to chakra. He does not, cannot realize that every weapon of water he creates gives me yet another source of air to draw on. Every attack he was priming is matched by an invisible fluctuation on my side, only possible due to his meddling in nature. My experience as a sage left with a deep and lasting connection to the world around me - in his arrogance, and desire to destroy me, Yagura continues to hand me the strength I need to stop him.

If I was in his shoes, the smartest decision I could have made was to unleash the full power of his biju on the rebels, eliminating them entirely. In his arrogance, however, he started small and was gradually working his way up. The air stabilizes; he has finished his preparations. The finally tally of orbs of water is at twenty, each the size of a watermelon.

I smile. I may not be able to reach out and grab the air around me, or create enough wind chakra to match this attack - not cost effectively, anyways - but I am more than capable of reaching out into the chakra laden air around me and pulling off my own technique.

Forty lances fly through the air. Twenty jets of water streak out from the orbs of water Yagura collected, met by twenty twisting gusts of wind that scream as they race forwards. They collide above the open land between us, setting off huge explosions of mist, each clashing with a thunderous roar, reminiscent of a mighty waterfall.

In instants, it is over - neither of us is injured, but the land around us had been pitted and scarred. I had lost over a fourth of my chakra in that exchange, but the effects of the Kyuubi's cloak hid any fatigue that I feel. Yagura certainly isn't happy - his face had lost all expression, and he isn't talking to himself any longer. He flashes through another series of seals, and the air behind him glows, spheres of water beginning to form again. There are at least twice as many this time, and he is still creating more. I could try to match him again, but that would be stupid. Yagura's a fully fledged jinchuuriki, and I'm six. The difference in the levels of chakra is too big for me to fight him like this. But - there was a way for me to survive. My hands flash through seals, finishing just in time for the first blast to head my way.

The next moments are a flurry of motion. I use the wind jutsu I know, shooting air from my palms and forcing the water to curve away from me. It's ridiculously hard, and it takes every single ounce of my strength, speed, skill to survive. My arms blurred and ached, my chest seizes up as my lungs starve for air. I ignore it all, because the moment I made a mistake is the moment I lose. Then it happens. My right hand had batted away one jet, and my left had just pushed another over my head, when something slams into my unprotected left side faster than I could see. It hits me like a hammer, and I fly in a graceless arc towards a sky. As I twist around, I see Yagura's outstretched palm where my ribs had been a second ago - the spray from his technique had blinded my to his approach.

I land with a thud, my entire left side numb with pain. I probably have a some serious damage to my previously injured ribs, but it looks like my chakra cloak protected me from the worst of the damage. Yagura appears above me, swinging with both hands. Each time, I roll out of the way feeling the pressure from the movement. He stomps the ground, aiming at my head, but I perform a quick replacement with a log, escaping safely. Don't waste time asking where the log came from - generations have tried to solve it without success. The log shatters under his foot, throwing little bits of wood everywhere. As he blinks to protect his eyes, I unwind the flail again and send the blade whistling back at him. He sidesteps, easily dodging, but he isn't the target in the first place. The wire loops around the hook on his staff, left behind when he attacked me, and I send the whole system flying, flail and staff both. It ended up being a little more painful that I thought it would be, but my plan had worked perfectly. Getting him to take me out with long range attacks, leaving his staff alone, then getting the damn staff off the battlefield. All in all, he reacted just as I thought he would.

He clearly isn't very happy, and he dashes towards me, swinging a rising roundhouse kick at my head. His staff work is good, but I definitely have an edge in terms of pure taijutsu. I duck the kick and unleashed a full body uppercut right at the inside of his knee, getting a cry of pain from the Kage. It's not broken, but I hit hard enough to make it hurt, even through the cloak. His tail stabs at me, and I smash it into the ground with my own pair. He flashes through a short sequence of seals, spitting a bullet of water at me. My tails cross over my head, blocking the point blank shot. His free tail, however, curves upwards, under the shield, and rapidly comes at my face. I jerk backwards and avoid it by the slimmest of margins - even still, it was close enough to tear my cloak and leave a livid red mark on my cheek. That was too close for comfort, but I can't afford to let him get any room. I move back in, spinning my twin tails like rotors, chewing up the ground and air. His single tail was hard pressed to stop them both, and his attempts to use a jutsu were constantly interrupted. Eventually, he manages to complete a seal, but my tails wrap around his hands and force them together. Using the contact point as a fulcrum, I jump straight up and come down hard. My tails whip me around in an arc and my knee slams into his face, unleashing all the momentum I had gathered. He staggers, but before he can regain his balance, I grab his hair with both hands and smash his face with my other knee. This time, he goes down.

Even on the ground, he was still conscious. As I rain blow after blow down upon him, he shields his face with his arms, enduring everything I throw at him. His cloak mitigates the damage I can deal ou, which is already low enough as it is, so I pull a kunai and jam into his side. It penetrates around half an inch, and then freezes in place as his cloak thickens and darkens. A second tail sprouts and grabs me by the waist, hurling me into a boulder. Damn. I thought I'd have more time to wear him down before he stepped it up, but I still had a plan in reserve. I look down at myself, noting that my clothing is barely hanging on - it's a good thing that I left most of my storage scrolls in the room I had slept in. The scroll I need is still tucked away, however, so the state of the rest of my outfit doesn't really matter. I quickly unroll the parchment, pulsing chakra into the inscribed seal. A puff of smoke heralds one of my last trump cards - two fist sized metal orbs, connected by a two meter length of chain. It's a meteor hammer I borrowed from Ringo. The quality is excellent, and it bears signs of use - this is no decorative or makeshift weapon.

I grasp the middle of the chain and swing each end in a separate figure eight pattern. Without his staff, Yagura will be hard pressed to avoid this - I erase the distance between us again, bringing the battle back to melee range. As our tails clash, I yank in one side of the chain. The speed of the weight swinging on the right end of the chain instantly picks up to a formless blur before it connects solidly with his stomach, driving the air out of him. Without even reeling the weight back in, I whip out the other end, pulling the first head back to me with the centrifugal force generated. The weight slams into his head and he staggers. With the extra range granted by the weapon, and our tails keeping the others away from the battle, I proceed to hammer him over and over again. As blood flowed and bruises piled up on top of bruises, Yagura roared and charged forward, trying to overpower me with brute force. Unfortunately for me, it works - I simply don't have the leverage to stop him. Instead, I pull my tails back and send one end of the meteor hammer into the air. As his momentum carries him onwards, I slide my body under his legs, jumping and catching the free flying chain. There are some benefits to being tiny - not many, but they certainly exist.

I land with my feet on his shoulders, and the chain of my weapon wrapped securely around his throat. Jinchuuriki or not, he still needs to breathe. I exert all the force I can produce, and the veins in his head bulge as he tenses every muscle in his neck. His tails desperately lash at me, but my own force them away from me. He reaches towards me with his arm, but I lift a heel and pound it into his head, over and over again. Like the toppling of a tall pine, he slowly tips over and topples to the ground. This - is my victory. I squeeze the chain again, to ensure his incapacitance, than pull another kunai out to slit his throat. As the tip digs into his skin, however, a blast of energy throws me off Yagura's back. I hit the ground, hard, and look up to see the Fourth Kage of the Village Hidden in the Mist standing above me, three blue tails whipping around him.

* * *

The battle inside the cavern was won. The enemy forces had been routed when they froze in fear of the aura of yet another jinchuuriki. Ringo didn't blame them - the Kyuubi emitted a presence unlike any she had had the misfortune of feeling before. The rebels, however, had been exposed to it once before. This wasn't enough for them to shake of the feelings of sheer terror, but at least they weren't turning into gibbering wrecks the way some of the Kiri-nin were. After that, things went pretty smoothly. The New Kiri forces rallied around her, and they drove out the rebels. Throughout the whole process, however, she kept part of her mind focused on the battle raging above them. She could feel the Kyuubi's foul chakra level stay constant, and Naruto's gradually dropping. She was not quite a sensor, but she was good enough to feel when his chakra dropped by more than a fourth, followed by another severe drop. She had been methodically moving through the survivors, helping where she could when she had felt a spike in chakra - Yagura had unleashed at least one tail of his biju. She looked at Yuki Suno, whom she had just dug out from her icy shell, and raised an eyebrow. Amongst those present and aware, Suno was the best sensor left. She paused for a moment, then her eyes shot open and she held up one finger. That was still manageable, according to what Naruto had told her. She rolled Ameyuri over, performing an emergency first aid jutsu on her seared lungs. Suno, though short on her chakra herself, swallowed a soldier pill and began to help.

The wounded Kiri-nin escaped as well - while New Kiri had technically won, they were simply too weak to manage pursuit. Honestly, she didn't really want to weaken Kiri any further either. Outside of Zabuza, Kisame, and Ameyuri, the Seven Swordsmen were dead. Two of the clan leaders had been killed, and countless other ninja were dead as well. No, if there was to even be a village after this, the fighting had to stop. Ameyuri coughed, and Ringo helped her sit up. She had been pretty lucky - her innate skill with lightning ninjutsu, coupled with the abilities of her swords, had been just enough to ground the majority of the electricity that coursed through her. Most of the others in the blast radius were significantly less fortunate. She cast a dispassionate eye on the charred bodies that had been flash frozen. She was too tired to care about the senseless deaths; all she wanted was for this war to end.

Ameyuri, Suno, and Ringo froze, as a wave of chakra washed over them. Two sets of eyes shot to Suno, who stiffened and held up two fingers. Others in the cave had felt the wave too, but Ringo stood and waved for them to continue their work. Discreetly, she palmed a soldier pill and brought it to her mouth, swallowing it with the briefest of grimaces - no matter how much research was done to improve the effectiveness of the pill, the taste never got any better. She turned around just in time to see Ameyuri make a similar grimace.

"Really? You realize, of course, that while you may have been lucky enough not to have been burnt to a crisp, you nerves are still damaged? I have no -" A tremor shook the cavern, and loose rocks fell from the hole that led upwards.

"Three - oh god, he's used all three." Suno wrapped her arms around herself, and Ameyuri embraced her in comfort. They turned to each other, seeking solace in their beloved's presence.

Ringo had no such comfort. All around her, ninja were dropping like flies as they felt the pressure of two jinchuuriki battling it out on the mountain above them. Several swift gestures brought the most hardy of them back to their sense, and she rapidly signalled the retreat. Ninja carried the bodies of the wounded and dead, escaping through the one surviving tunnel that led away from the battle overhead. Ringo stayed where she was, and a soft hand firmly grasped her left shoulder. She looked back and saw a group of ninja stand with her, led by Suno and Ameyuri. As one, they tightened their Kiri forehead protectors, and lifted their hands to the sky above. Tears glistened in her eyes as Ringo led her ninja, her countrymen, her children, to what may be their final battle.

* * *

Yagura was laughing. It isn't normal laughter, or even a hysterical outpouring. No, this was the frenzied laughter of the mad, and it's starting to grate on my nerves. Then again, there really wasn't much that I could do about it. My body had been pretty chewed up - the difference between two and three tails was enormous. His biju was twice as powerful as the number of tails I could use, and he was stronger than me anyways. At this point, nothing I had could even penetrate his cloak - kunai shattered on impact, and my own shroud was canceled out by his greater one. I clumsily rise to my feet - if I have to die, I'll do it standing up. Yagura, still laughing, spits a wave of water at me, one that moves at furious speeds and swallows up everything its path.

A wave of heat erupts behind me and a wall of lava bursts out of the ground in front of me. Tired as I was, it takes me a moment to realize what was going on. I turn and look behind me, and there stands Ringo, the wielder of Kiba, and the leader of the Yuki clan. Behind them are a handful of other ninja. Ringo smiles at me with thumbs up, and I can't help but smiling back. Still, they're exhausted, and many are barely in better shape than I am.

"Tag out, Naruto. You've done more than enough, and it's our turn to handle him." Ringo and the rest walk by me, some patting me on the head as they go. It's somewhat demeaning, but I really don't have the energy to care. I collapse and watch the battle unfold.

* * *

"Die you monster!" Ameyuri shouted and darted at Yagura, faster than Ringo thought the girl was still capable of. Looking closer, she saw that the foolish girl was speeding herself up by flowing lightning natured chakra through her body. It was a dangerous idea on a good day and doing it when you nerves were shot was the height of insanity. Then again - Ringo glanced over at Suno and saw her going through a long series of handseals. Love made people do the strangest things. Ameyuri lashed out with her twin blades, trying to slash Yagura's face. The man let out another laugh and caught her wrist with one of his tails. One of her blades slipped through, however, carving off a section of his shoulder. He screamed grabbed her other arm with another tail and started to pull. Ringo took a step forward and was held back by the four ninja guarding her. She cursed, but settled down and continued to gather chakra. It was fine, anyways - Ameyuri would be fine.

Before Yagura could even pull hard enough to cause her to scream, Suno had appeared behind him in a body flicker. She slammed her hand into the ground behind his feet, springing into a handstand and wrapping her legs around his neck and crushing his head between the soles of her feet. Giant spikes of ice blossomed from the point where her hands hit the ground, and Yagura's feet were pierced by crystal clear blades. His third tail grabbed Suno by her leg and flung her into the ground, followed shortly by Ameyuri. The swordswoman grabbed her love and pulled her away from the battlefield. As Yagura turned to give chase, Ringo finished gathering the chakra she needed. With a flicker, she appeared between the fleeing ninja and the Mizukage, slamming her hands into his chest and releasing a brilliant white bar of liquid fire. Seven petals spread out from the contact point, and the beam pushed Yagura up into the mountain peak, which melted under the intense heat. Ringo gasped for breath, feeling her chakra fall to dangerously low levels. The Burning Rose of Heaven was a taxing technique, requiring a significant charging period and damaged the user as well. She would be incapable of using any high level techniques for at least a week, while her chakra system healed.

A roar echoed through the mountains, louder and more bestial that a human throat should have been able to produce. A dark speck appeared in the air high above them. It came down quickly, increasing in size as it did so. The collision with the ground was too fast for Ringo to catch any details other than the impression of a large, four legged creature, but that was more than enough to tell her what it was. As the dust from the arrival cleared, she was able to see into the impact crater. The creature was horrific to behold. It was akin in shape to a turtle, in the same sense that a greater lion was related to a common housecat. There were four legs and a massive shell. A wedge shaped head protruded from under the shell, and the reverse end sported three wide, spiny tails. It stood over three hundred feet high, dwarfing everything on the mountain. All the rebel ninja shuddered. They still remembered its brutality and horrible power in the massacres, and standing before it now, looking up at its massive bulk, they felt nothing but fear.

The Sanbi reared back and roared, focusing on the ninja that dared stand against it. A massive foot lifted into the air, and smashed down. Suno, who had looped around the battlefield when Ringo had blasted Yagura, vaulted over the other ninja and called up a thick dome of ice. The foot smashed into the hurried shelter, cracks forming instantly. As it leaned on the ice, twin cracks of thunder heralded spears of lightning striking the armoured behemoth, with little to no effect. The Sanbi retaliated with a swipe of its tails. Three gigantic diamonds of ice sprouted from the ground formed a thick, adamant wall that held back the tails. The four ninja that had been guarding Ringo lept out of the cracks in the dome, running up the three tailed's leg. Before they could get very far, a blast of water pulverized their bodies. Ringo looked to the Sanbi in shock, and saw a man sitting on the head of the turtle. Yagura had not only summoned the three tails, he was also capable of fighting alongside it. The turtle took advantage of the distraction to crush the dome of ice, with the two remaining occupants barely escaping. Suno fell to her knees, absolutely exhausted. Ringo was barely doing better, hooking an arm under Suno's and dragging her away. Ameyuri covered their retreat, dancing in the eye of a crackling storm of lightning.

The Sanbi, furious that its prey was getting away, gathered energy at the tips of its tails. It brought the tails over its mouth, sucking in the black light, chest expanding under the pressure. This was the ultimate attack that all the biju possessed - the bijudama, capable of erasing entire cities in one horrific blast. Here, the Sanbi was holding back significantly, since it only had three tiny targets. What's the point of wasting more energy than it had to? Ringo and the others watched as the solid black sphere shot towards them. A brightly glowing figure with what seemed to be seven limbs jumped in the air between them, facing the sphere. It swelled up, and then screamed.

* * *

Contrary to most rumors, Itachi did in fact feel emotions. He cared deeply, too deeply, in fact. It was one of the reasons that he guarded his heart so cautiously. For the people he cared about, he would move heaven and earth to help. On this occasion, however, he could do nothing. He knew that something was wrong when he arrived at Konoha and saw no sight of his student, but there was nothing he could do.

He sighed and went back to filling out forms. It was out of his hands now, anyways. Brushing pipe ash away from the surface of the desk in the Hokage tower, he signed yet another page and stamped it. Paperwork sucked.

* * *

God damn. I hurt. I hurt a lot, actually. Hmm. Toes, fingers, check. I can feel my face, too. Well, good news is I'm alive. Bad news is I can't remember a time I've been lower on chakra without actually being clinically dead. It turns out jumping in front of a bijudama and screaming at it, especially when struggling for partial control over three full tails of another biju's chakra, was surprisingly effective. Monumentally stupid, yet effective. As I wheezed painfully, the thought came that an exploding bijudama looked an awful lot like the sun. Oh, wait. I couldn't sleep just yet. I had to get up. I didn't have time to lie down and catch his breath. There were still people -

A rattling gasp nearby alerts me to the presence of at least one other person nearby. I slowly tilted my head, and caught sight of a white haired lady and two other girls with her. Wait, not, that's Ringo and the other two ninja. Now is really not the time for senile dementia. The four of us trade glances, yet remain silent. What is there to say? We tried our hardest, but we still failed. I looked down, seeing the massive beast framed between my feet. Oh joy. Looks like we're about to get obliterated. Sorry, you three - I'll try better next time. The biju opens his mouth, ready to fire, and the fist of god smacks it right in the jaw. Literally.

* * *

The God of Ninja was angry. Very angry, in fact. He had just finished a stack of that infernal paperwork, and was settling back to enjoy a good smoke while pursuing his student's latest foray into literature, when his office door slammed open and young Itachi barged in. The end result was an angry Hokage and a terrified group of ANBU who were supposed to be his guards. Pathetic - a little killing intent had them whimpering like little girls. Still, the situation was his fault for not checking the circumstances behind the mission better before assigning it to a fresh genin, even a prodigy that had clearly inherited a great deal from his genius father. And mother too, honestly. Still, after setting a new long distance land speed record on the way to Kiri, Sarutobi Hiruzen was more than a little pissed off when he found his wayward genin about to be blasted by a bijudama. Summoning Enma, he rocketed upwards on the tip of his expanding staff and slammed his fist into the Sanbi's lower jaw, forcing it to swallow its own attack.

****Bad turtle. Timeout time.

* * *

A/N: Alright, bet you didn't see that coming. Anyways, this is our longest chapter by far. We hope you enjoyed it. We were going to finish the Sarutobi vs. Sanbi fight, but one of us got tired and fell asleep at the keyboard, so I'm posting what we have.

Review please! Tell us what you think is going to happen next chapter :P


	18. Ready, Set, Over

Over the last hundred years or so, I had seen many, many battles. Some were fairly even; others were totally one sided. This battle, however, is amongst the most unique. In fact, I hesitate to even term this a battle in the first place.

It's odd, really - when the Hokages are brought up in conversation, people tend to skip over the Third. The First established the village, the Second got it running properly and created much of the surviving administration, and the Fourth defeated the greatest threat Konoha ever faced. All impressive feats, to be sure. The Third, however, has no outstanding feats of glory to his name. He has plenty of impressive achievements, however, but the most important is also the most overlooked.

Bar none, Sarutobi Hiruzen was the longest serving Kage, period. In his prime, he was even known as a "god" - not a literal one, obviously, but as the epitome of what a ninja should be. It's strange, then, that people tend to look at him and see the Professor that he became in peace, rather than the god he was in war. Well, I can guarantee that no one watching this will make that mistake ever again.

There's an enormous thud, followed shortly by the Sanbi striking the valley floor head first. I wince - no matter how tough that shell is, that has to hurt. Besides me, Ringo lets out a short whistle.

"I know it's been awhile since I last saw him in action, but that Hokage of yours has only gotten better." She shifts in her position, reclining against the shattered remains of a boulder. Suno and Ameyuri probably have something to say as well, but they're a little too busy holding each other and shuddering in fear. I can't say I blame them - the scene in front of us was absolutely terrifying.

* * *

Sarutobi Hiruzen adjusted his hat on his head as he looked down at the giant turtle below him. The brainless thing was struggling to get back to its feet, and it certainly wasn't happy. Not that he cared, since the end result would be the same anyways.

His hand dipped into the inner pocket of his voluminous robes and pulled out a pair of chopsticks he stored away in case he had extra time to eat something. Afterall, it was easy to check food for poison, but few people thought of checking the utensils. Twirling them through his fingers, he ran through several examples in his head, ranging from when he personally assassinated the corrupt daimyo around thirty years ago - the fool had all his food tested, but it was a slow acting contact poison on the outside of his glass that did him in - to times when he had escaped death by bringing his own tools to a meal.

He glanced back at the turtle, watching as the young man on its head spat out a jet of condensed water. Stepping to side, he watched as the stream blasted a shallow crater where he had stood. Shoddy technique, really - too many handseals required, the water was too slow, and it was somewhat difficult to actually hit a target from that far away with that jutsu. He shook his head; there were times when he had to wonder what exactly the new generation was being taught.

Lazily whipping his hand towards the Sanbi, he curled his other hand into a single seal. The slim sticks of wood, enhanced to their limit with wind natured chakra, multiplied over and over again. Where there was once a single pair, there was now a wall of wood crashing down onto the biju. The cutting wind that surrounded each utensil tore through the body of the beast in seconds, sending up a spray of chakra enhanced water that served as the construct's blood.

It roared in pain, but the injury was not as serious as it looked - within seconds, the Sanbi had drawn on the water in the area to heal its body. Sarutobi clicked his tongue and brought both hands into a seal, than another, and finally into a third. A massive wave of earth rolled down the mountainside, barely avoiding the injured mist ninja and his genin. It struck the broadside of the turtle, which turned and pushed back. The following wave of water changed the valley into a churning pool of mud, binding the Sanbi's movements and nearly burying it. The final technique, a giant fireball, dehydrated the mud and baked the biju in place - Yagura was forced to stop it with an equivalent wave of water.

The Mizukage roared in anger, but the Hokage turned his back and reached down for Enma, currently in his diamond-hard staff form. A pulse of energy swept over him, heralding the formation of another bijudama from the Sanbi. Before the beast could fire, he swung the staff over his shoulder, knocking the turtle's head into the ground and forcing it to prematurely detonate the attack.

This was beginning to become tiresome. Using Enma as a spear, Hiruzen retracted and extended his length, pounding away at the biju with one hand, while scratching a particularly hard to reach spot between his shoulder blades. Really, if it weren't for the fact that the longer he spent taking care of this, the longer he was away from his paperwork, he would have finished this a long time ago.

He stopped the barrage against the Sanbi, allowing it to catch its breath, then followed up with a series of slow balls of lightning - as a matter of fact, one of the few slow lightning techniques out there. Using the crackling orbs as walls to fence the turtle in, he hemmed it in until it was constrained to the center of the valley. The Mizukage tried to blow them out of the way with jets of water, but Sarutobi easily disrupted those with blows from the massive length of his staff. After a few painful shocks from the spheres, the Sanbi had learned to avoid them. Hiruzen allowed himself a small smirk - he did love it when plans came together so well.

A whirlwind descended on the battlefield, tearing apart the lightning technique and filling the center of the valley with a mixed storm of electricity and cutting blades of wind. A dragon of fire swept down the mountain and roared through the inclement weather. As it enveloped the struggling duo, it condensed, drawing the surrounding air into it and heating up drastically, before exploding in a burst of light.

The Hokage frowned - that last combination was just a little bit too showy for his tastes. He must be getting rusty.

* * *

At this point, all four of us are in a kind of shock. I'm suffering from the aftereffects of using the Kyuubi's chakra in a body unprepared for it, Ringo seems to have subdermal burns, and the other two are off being useless in the corner. Then again, it's not like there's any need for us to do anything - the old man is currently using Enma to bat the Sanbi around like a pinball while idly checking the nails of his other hand. Occasionally, he'll vary it up with a few combination techniques, but I swear that he's starting to get bored.

Ringo probably agrees with me, but neither of us feels like talking about it. I mean, what would we even say, anyways? Oh hey, great weather we're having - doesn't that old man beating up one of the most powerful beasts in the world look a little bored?

The Sanbi gets a bit of breathing space, and I think Yagura decided that there was no way to win this one - at least, that's the only reason for what he does next. Suicide by Sarutobi; it kinda has a nice ring to it.

* * *

Terumi Ringo was in pain, but she was ignoring it. It was hard to feel second or third degree burns under your skin when there was the mother of all unequal fights taking place in front of you. As she watched the Hokage treat the Sanbi as a misbehaving pet, she mentally vowed to make sure Kiri stayed on the right side of Konoha.

In one of the moments where the Hokage held of his non-stop beating of the biju, it started gathering energy for another menacing ball. She sighed; after some point, you'd think that it would get the picture. On cue, the Hokage's extending staff slammed into the biju's right eye, followed by the left - the equivalent of poking someone in the eyes when they are trying to juggle.

The orb of black energy exploded in the Sanbi's face, forcing Yagura to raise a thick barrier of water around himself. As the Hokage pulled back his staff, however, the real nature of the biju's desperate plan unfolded.

* * *

Sarutobi Hiruzen was generally a nice man. If you leafed through a dictionary and looked up grandfatherly, his picture would be the first thing there. At the same time, if you went and checked wrathful, you'd see the same picture. As Hokage, he was both the village's ultimate sword and shield. He would be the first to fight and the last to fall - any father would do the same for his children, and his family was all the village. He had born the same day that village had been founded, and till his last dying breath, his village would come before everything.

The Sanbi, outmatched and nearly defeated, made one last desperate gamble. Distracting the Hokage with a bijudama, its three tails speared towards the four bystanders. It probably hoped to force its enemy to protect them, opening himself up for a decisive finish.

If it had been just the Mist ninja lying there, Hiruzen probably couldn't care less. Unfortunately, one of the four just happened to be a Konoha genin, and one that the Hokage had a soft spot for, to boot.

There was a surge of killing intent that blanketed the entire mountainside. Every living thing within miles felt it, and smaller animals began to drop dead from sheer terror. Larger animals ran mindlessly, just aching to flee from the death behind them. Humans, separated from their baser instincts by a layer of rationality, froze. Their minds blanked, and many of them found it difficult to breathe. Of the four on the mountain, two instantly slipped into unconsciousness. One had felt a lesser version of this same presence many years before, and barely managed to weather it. The last could bear it mentally, but his young body had no defenses against the overwhelming feelings and started to shut down.

The actual target of the intent, being a massive body of chakra to begin with, felt a muffled version. It was still enough to send it to the ground, its tails falling limp on the ground and crushing dozens of trees underneath their weight. Yagura, standing on the head of his biju, was barely able to move. He brought up his staff in a two handed block, creating a shimmering disk of water before him. The water mirror technique could reflect anything that was used against it, canceling out th-

The Third Hokage of Konoha, Sarutobi Hiruzen, known as both the God of Ninja and the Professor, smashed the Fourth Mizukage's body into paste with a double handed swing using a staff the length and width of a fifty story building.

* * *

On second thought, maybe investing a point in** stone cold** would have been worth it - it doesn't do me much good to be able to think clearly if my body tries to kill itself. Death by chemical imbalance is not a fun way to go. The good news is the battle's over. Granted, it was a little anticlimactic, but I think it's done. I look at the red smear is the trench across the valley floor. Actually, I'm very sure the battle's over - I don't know anybody alive who can come back from that kind of damage. The bad news is the old man's heading over this way and he looks kinda grumpy.

As his shadow falls over my face, I reflexively close my eyes, waiting for the rebuke I'm sure is coming. Even as an old man, the Third remains the only parental figure in my life - I may be older than him, but it sure doesn't feel like it right now. Instead of anger, however, a gnarled hand rests on my head and playfully ruffles my hair.

"You did well, Naruto." His voice is warm and somewhat amused, and I look up from under his hand to see a gentle smile gracing his aged face. I struggle to get up and salute, but a soft pressure keeps me from rising. He sweeps of his hat with his free hand and dumps it on my head. "I'll let you hold onto this for a while - you've earned it. Now sleep, you troublesome child."

I want to protest being treated like a baby, but my eyelids are heavy and they sink against my will. Hmm. I guess a little sleep doesn't sound too bad.

* * *

The first thing I hear is the chirping of birds - odd, considering where I should be, but nothing overtly suspicious. There's a low murmur of voices, but the closest is indistinct, probably muffled by a few walls. A weak sun in shining on my face, and a gentle breeze is brushing my face and stirring my locks. As a whole, it's quite peaceful, which actually makes me more paranoid than if I had woken up in a tense situation. I crack my eyes open, just enough to get a general impression of my surroundings, and after the spots start to vanish, I find myself squinting at a tiled ceiling.

There's nothing binding me to the bed, but a thin tube leads from a needle in my arm to a plastic pouch hanging from a stand. Reaching over with my other hand, I pry off the tape over the needle and carefully slide it out. I stretch, working out the kinks in my muscles, feeling a dull yet pervasive ache throughout my entire body. I'm dressed in a typical hospital gown, loosely bound at the back, and honestly, while a normal child probably wouldn't have much in the way of a nudity taboo, my elderly mind is just a little more modest.

A knock on the door drives away any stray thoughts I have, and when the doctor walks in, clearly puzzled by the lack of a patient, I drop down from the ceiling and land on her back, forcing her to to the ground and squeezing her neck between my palms. In just a few seconds, she falls limp - still alive, but her mind will naturally blur the circumstances of her collapse. I relieve her of a nice white lab coat, and take a handful of pens while I'm at it.

Ripping the bottom half of the coat off gives me a mask of sorts, while shortening the garment to something that barely fits me. Now armed and dressed, though admittedly with rather makeshift supplies, I take to the ceilings and make my way through the sterile white halls. Judging by the lack of large chakra signatures in the vicinity, this is probably a civilian hospital. I pass by an empty operating room as a nurse wheels a hand cart out. not one to pass up an opportunity, I drop her the same way I did the doctor earlier, and make off with several surgical implements.

Slowly, I make my way to the nearest exit, looting freely as I go. It's at the exit that I spot my first problem - there are people walking in the street outside, and the receptionist is in full view of them. The only way around him is to cause a distraction, but that will get the attention of the passersby as well. It's a risk I'm going to have to take, because the trail of unconscious hospital staff is going to be discovered any second now, and I need to get out of here before they start hunting for the perpetrator. Granted, I could have hidden them, but that would have slowed me down and I plan to use the chaos from their discovery to cover my tracks.

Well, there are ways around every problem. I crawl across the ceiling until I'm positioned right above the single receptionist at his desk, then began my preparations. Taking a scalpel, I slice off both ends of the casing for a ball point pen, discarding the leaking ink capsule inside. I place a swaged suturing needle in the tube after liberally coating it with a fast acting general anesthetic, then take careful aim. A sharp exhalation plants the sharp end of the needle directly into the skin behind the jaw, sinking into the internal carotid arteries. Within a handful of seconds, the guard slumps forward, and I jerk the needle out and back into my hand. Not the safest thing to do, medically speaking, but he's in a hospital. Emergency care is just three floors away.

****As I scramble out the door and into the main streets of the city, I blend in with a clump of people moving slowly down the road. I need to figure out where I am and what's going on, but first things first - I need to find me some ramen.

* * *

A/N: Okay, this chapter took longer to do than we planned for, but my partner's out looking at colleges, so I was stuck on my own. The next chapter should be out faster, and be longer.

On another note, we do read all the review we get, and we do take them into consideration when we're writing. Some of you have taken the time to write something thoughtful, and we really appreciate it. While we do try to respond to all reviews, there are times when, well, we lose track of which ones we've responded too. Seriously, we're not always the most organized people in the world. So if you happen to be one of the few who've written a page long review, we'll get to you - just as soon as my partner gets back from the midwest and thaws out his fingers.

Thanks for reading!


	19. Food, Fight, Friend?

Well, as any ninja worth their salt knows, the best way to find the ramen is to use your nose. After distinguishing where that unique smell of broth and noodles is coming from, I start drifting through the crowd, careful not to stand out, bumping into the occasional pedestrian. Really, a rather telling mistake of most ameteur ninja is to avoid the crowd completely - unfortunately, since it's actually very difficult to walk through a mass of people and not hit anyone, they tend to stand out more. My reduced height is an advantage here, since most civilian adults tend to hunch over slightly and look down, creating a canopy of sorts that covers much of my movement from above.

As I keep pace with the men around me, I look to the ground and extend my other senses. The dialect being spoken is indigenous to the south east of the Elemental Nations, but that places me anywhere from the Land of Water to the Land of Tea. The number of weak to moderately powerful chakra signatures suggests that this is a ninja village, and the tang of sea in the air coupled with the humidity makes me think that this is Kiri, but it certainly doesn't look the way I remember it.

Rolling my neck, I take a leisurely glance at the rooftops before bringing my head back down again. Sure enough, ninja with Kiri headbands are hopping around. Since the rebels were living in a cave, and the actual village belonged to the ninja loyal to Yagura, I'm going to guess that I'm not exactly welcome here. That does beg the question of why I appeared in a civilian hospital, but it's possible that I was mistaken for a child. Granted, it is a rather remote possibility, but either way, I need to get back to Konoha. None of my equipment is exactly irreplaceable, so there's no point wasting time looking for it.

I slip a scalpel into my hand and discreetly look for a suitable target. There - a portly man with an obscene amount of jewelry hanging off him. There are a couple guards around him, but none of them are paying much attention to things around them. It's child's play to bypass their perimeter and slip behind the man's bulk, matching my pace to his. I time my actions precisely, and then dip and cut. He stumbles forward, knocking down the guard in front of him and screaming pathetically. The rest of his men are crowding around him and trying to get him back to his feet - not that it'll do much good, since he's not going to be walking anywhere with a sliced achilles tendon.

In the confusion, I slip away, watching several of the nearby ninja converge upon the commotion. As I head towards the enticing smell, I tuck away several of the wallets I acquired after removing the cash and storing it separately. Now, on to the good stuff.

* * *

It didn't take too long to find a ramen stall, and the savory scents drifting on the wind made me salivate. I approach casually and slip onto one of the raised stools by the counter.

"Hey kid, what can I do for you?" The proprietor is a middle aged man, balding and growing a small paunch, but otherwise healthy. He's not really paying attention to what I'm wearing, and I'm thankful that I'm in a ninja village - outlandish costumes barely rate a raised eyebrow.

"I'll take three miso and one chicken, old man." Hmm, four should be just enough to take the edge off.

"You - you sure about that, kid?" He's a bit shocked, not that I blame him. I have a higher metabolism than most, as do all ninja, but I have the additional burden of having to burn excess energy for my body to maintain stable levels of human chakra to counter the trace biju chakra in my system. Other people just get chakra exhaustion - jinchuuriki get a really bad case of full body heartburn.

"Of course I'm sure! I'm pretty hungry right now."

"Alright kid, but I'll have you be paying first." Understandable, if somewhat untrusting, but even the civilians in a ninja village are more paranoid than those that live elsewhere. I slip out a handful of bills and pass them to the man - it's more than the actual cost of the meal, but it's not like I'm spending my own money, anyways.

* * *

I slurp the last of the broth in my fourth bowl and stack it on top of the other three. "Thanks for the meal, old man."

"S-sure, kid, come again."

Hmm. Five minute detour taken care of, I hop off the stool and take stock of my surroundings. Assuming I'm in Kiri, and that it's in roughly the same area as I remember it to be, then I shouldn't be too far from the coast. The sun is shining clearly, and it's definitely before noon, so if I move fast, I can get out of here without any complications.

With that in mind, I wave at the ramen vendor and walk back onto the main street. I scan the crowd, watching for patterns of movement, then step against the flow of traffic. Following the opposite path as the majority is taking should lead me to a less congested area, and from there I should be able to plan an escape. At the same time, I can't use any chakra to help, because it'd be like lighting a giant signal fire for every half-decent sensor in the village.

It takes around half an hour of steady walking, but I eventually draw near the outskirts of the city. There's a large wall around the main village with a swift river circling it, about a mile or so from my current location. From where I am, I can only see one open gate that leads to a drawbridge over the river, but there are a set of guards watching over it - the easy way is out, then. As I walk further from the city center, I stick to the center of the road and relax. The easiest way to deflect attention is to look like you belong where you are. As I pass through a residential area, I snag a pair of shorts that are hanging from a clothesline. I slip into the shadow of a house, and moments later, I walk back into plain sight, wearing the pants, a torn strip of the hospital gown as a bandana over my head, and a mustache inked above my lip. I flip the marker in my hand for a second, then finish it off with a drawing of a monocle and some doodles on the lab coat.

Anybody who sees me now is going to assume that I'm a kid who's been playing a bit too much - after all, what kind of threat walks confidently down a street looking like a clown? As I pass a park near the wall, I see a group of children playing with a ball. Perfect.

* * *

The walls of Kiri were among the least impressive of the great ninja villages. Unlike Konoha's monumental barrier, or Suna's towering cliffs, these walls were made of simple granite and were at the highest around fifteen feet tall. It wasn't the wall that really guarded Kiri, however. Around the village was a thick, clinging mist, held firmly in place by a series of well maintained seals. Invaders would have to navigate the treacherous countryside while effectively blind, unless, of course, they could fly. Even if they reached the outskirts of the village, the real defense wasn't the wall - it was the river.

Though it appeared relatively passive and shallow at first glance, the river had a depth measured in tens of meters and whose current could sweep away entire trees and grind them to powder along the shark toothed inner bank. One slip into the river spelled doom for all but the most skilled ninja, or those at home in the water. As such, the guards stationed at the wall were somewhat lax in their duties - the only way in or out of the city was to cross one of three manned drawbridges. If anybody tried to climb the wall, the only fate awaiting them was a fifteen foot jump into a river over one hundred feet wide.

It was understandable, then, that the sight of a gaggle of children running by set of no internal alarms. They were a motley group, comprised of all ages and shapes, including one kid with teeth like a shark's and another that seemed to have had a run in with the wrong end of a permanent marker while asleep. Ah, kids. They get up to the craziest things.

Of course, if they had watched a little longer, they would have noticed the odd sight of one of the children dropping back and making a run up the wall.

* * *

Out of all the things I've had to climb in the last hundred years or so, this has to be amongst the easiest. The wall is poorly maintained, and has plenty of hand and foot holds for me to cling to. It's the work of a few quick seconds to scramble to the top, and then I hunch down and look at the next obstacle.

From what I remember, the river surrounding Kiri was infested with sharks and other predators, but they really shouldn't be an issue for me. Just in case, I take of the lab coat and pull out the permanent marker, finishing some of my doodles. With a pair of scalpels and a set of tongs used as a lever, I pry out a brick from the top of the wall, wrapping the coat around it. One pulse of chakra later, and the laden garment is flying over the wall and into the water, followed shortly after by a six year old. I hope I got the timing right, because otherwise this is going to hurt.

As the water closes over the white coat, I tense my body and lean forward, preparing myself for what's coming next. A dull whump resonates through the water as a swell balloons upwards and the pressure wave throws me across the river to the other bank. Explosive seals - best ninja tool ever.

Without further ado, I dash into the mist, trying to gain as much distance from the village as possible. They may not have noticed the (somewhat) subtle explosion, but I wouldn't count on it. As the heavy fog rolls over me, I look back and see an empty field leading to a river. I guess they really didn't notice after all. Looks like luck is on my side.

* * *

And, on second thought, I take back anything I said about having good luck. Within twenty minutes of running in a straight line, I just happen to run into a pair of Kiri nin. Well, I'm not just going to roll over and give up, so here we go.

"Hey there, what are you -"

"**Scan**."

**SANADA SANEN - CHUNIN, LVL 17**

**STRENGTH - 60**

**CONSTITUTION - 28**

**DEXTERITY - 35**

**INTELLIGENCE - 25**

**WISDOM - 24**

**CHARISMA - 25**

**SPEED - 60**

**CHAKRA - 137**

**CHAKRA CONTROL - *X2**

**SPECIALTIES: HIGH SPEED MELEE**

**BOUNTY: 750 RYO**

**DANGER: C-RANK**

**THREAT: MEDIUM**

**SANADA GOEN - CHUNIN, LVL 23**

**STRENGTH - 50**

**CONSTITUTION - 40**

**DEXTERITY - 67**

**INTELLIGENCE - 36**

**WISDOM - 30**

**CHARISMA - 15**

**SPEED - 40**

**CHAKRA - 156**

**CHAKRA CONTROL - *X3**

**SPECIALTIES: MEDIC, WIDE RANGE WATER NINJUTSU, LAYERED GENJUTSU**

**BOUNTY: 1200 RYO**

**DANGER: C-RANK**

**THREAT: MEDIUM**

Well, outside of the fact that they're both faster than me, we're all more or less even. Still, it's two on one, and there's a genjutsu specialist to boot. That, and the equipment I have on me amounts to pilfered hospital goods.

"Kid, whoever you are, turn around and lie -" The pair look like brothers, and the younger one keeps talking. I'll take him first, since he's distracted.

A quick hand sign heralds a blast of wind from my palm, followed up by a scalpel. The close combat one, Sanen, backhands the blade out of the air with a ringing noise. I look closer, and the glint of bronze reveals the brass knuckles he's wearing. The younger brother spits a glob of water at me that quickly expands and blocks my view. I roll backwards and get some space, coming up with a set of scalpels clenched between the knuckles of each hand, just in time to cross them over my head and block an axe kick. Sanen is wearing thick, metal plated boots, and the impact drives me back to the ground.

I come up in another roll, hiding the scalpels again, just to get hit by a faceful of water. It's a good deal more viscous than it should be, and in the time it takes me to clear my eyes of the gunk, an open palm crashes into my sternum. I move with the impact, using the momentum to fall into a backflip. I land on my feet, but a wave of nausea sweeps over me and I stagger, almost retching. What the - genjutsu.

A flare of my chakra dispels the induced imbalance, and I neatly parry a straight punch headed for my face. I nudge the following rising knee to the side and step in to deliver my own blow, but the ground and the sky trade places. In the split second where I'm distracted, a flurry of driving fists smash into my hastily raised guard. That's going to leave a nice set of bruises. As I let myself fall down, I hook my right ankle around Sanen's left knee, pulling him down on top of me.

I take a deep breath and shut my eyes tightly as I snap of the lid of a bottle and squeeze it hard towards his face. A white cloud erupts and he rolls off me, coughing hard. I jump back to my feet and throw away the bottle - talcum powder, good for soothing rashes and choking enemy ninja. I retrieve my scalpels, and perform the poor man's form of chakra flow on them. By flooding an object with a large amount of chakra then removing it all, and repeating this procedure in quick succession multiple times, it's possible to force it to vibrate and heat up. Granted, it's rather wasteful of chakra, but I happen to have quite a bit, and the best part is it needs very little control.

As Goen covers for his brother by attacking me with another wave of the sticky fluid, I hurl the three scalpels in my left hand through the wave. The blades cut through with a sharp hiss and eruption of steam, hiding their trajectories. He tries to dodge, but he ends up moving directly into the path of two of them, which embed themselves in the soft tissue of his upper thigh and hip.

I spin around to face Sanen, who's managed to clear the dust from his face, though he's still coughing. I grab a cylindrical container from a pocket and smash off the top. I'd borrowed quite a few things from the hospital, and amongst those is this beauty here - I wait till Sanen get within a few feet, then throw the contents of the glass container at him. As he slows, reluctant to get caught by another powder trap, I hurl burning scalpels at him and dive to the side. He brings up his brass knuckles and knocks away the blades again, sending up sparks where the two metals had contact.

A rush of wind, heat, and noise signal the minor explosion that just occurred. Before he can recover his wits, I slam my knee into his head repeatedly. One down, one to go.

Just then, the world flips upside down, starts spinning, and the colors invert. I pulse my chakra, but all that happens is the spinning stops. Then, a thick fluid nails me in the face, covering my nose and mouth and forcing me to claw at my skin to clear space to breathe. My eyes are sealed shut as well, and by the time I manage to free my mouth, two spikes of agony race up from my chest, grinding across my ribcage. As I jerk backwards, the side of a hand chops down into my left shoulder and dislocates it. Another blow to my solar plexus brings me to my knees, followed by a sharp kick that deadens the nerves in my right leg.

I fall backwards into a one handed spring, landing on my good leg. Goen jumps backwards as well, flashing through handseals as he goes. The wounds that he should have had are gone, with nothing but bloody patches of clothing to show for my efforts, and my scalpels have been returned to me - shallowly buried in the upper corners of my chest, actually. Damn medics, they're always a pain to fight. I pull out the scalpels with my useable hand and force him to abort his technique with a well placed volley. Using the breathing room that I have, I force my left shoulder back into its socket, gritting my teeth against the pain. This has been going on for too long.

Before Goen can retaliate, I manifest the full two tails of the Kyuubi's chakra that I can control and swat him out of the way like a fly. Much better.

Of course, in a rather nostalgic scenario, a ball of lava hits the ground next to me and splatters, showering me with burning fragments of rock. I spin around and see -

"Mei?"

* * *

A/N: Well, here's the next chapter. My partner's getting back tomorrow, but he did help out on this one - he's doing most of the next one. We do wonder if any of you can guess what's going on. We kinda hinted at it for a while, but we may not have done good enough of a job.

Tell us what you think!


	20. Winding Down

That voice, that fiery red hair - that's Mei, alright. The lava spitting is a pretty big clue as well. On the other hand, it probably wasn't the best idea to say that out loud.

"Who are you? How do you know my name?" Ooh, she's not happy. Actually, if she's here and concerned that I'm attacking Kiri nin, then I think I may have made a slight mistake. Yup, there's a Mist headband tied on her hip as well. Okay, time to defuse the situation.

"Alright, see, I know your grandmother, and you look quite like her, so -" Huh. Maybe not the best choice of words.

"Are you saying I look old! Shut up and die!" Damn. Looks like the hair trigger temper was around when she was younger as well. A glob of congealed lava flies my way, bursting into a flaming mess when it hits the ground. She's not quite as good as she was in my memories, which means I should be able to restrain her with two tails.

My extra appendages whip around me and bat her projectiles out of the air, and I charge forward to get in close. As I recall, her taijutsu was nothing to write home about - her long range ninjutsu, on the other hand, could be terrifying. She panics and backpedals, trying to get away from my chakra tails, but I'm actually faster than her.

I'm about three feet away from her when it hits me - a burning feeling spreads through my body, and my chakra control slips and then falls away entirely. I stumble and hit the ground, writhing in pain. The Kyuubi's chakra started thrashing wildly and lost cohesion, abrading the ground around me. Without the balancing force of my own chakra, the amount of the biju's chakra in my body started to grow against my will, passing into three tails and rapidly approaching four. The pain was overwhelming, and it was only my years of intense training with this very same energy that let me keep my head.

Even still, though my mind was still functioning, my body had started failing a while ago - recognizing the Kyuubi's chakra as a threat, my immature body had tried to oust it, draining my personal reserves to do so. On the other hand, as I called on the fox's chakra myself it kept replenishing, eventually overcoming my body's defenses. Normally, though, it should have taken much longer to do this kind of damage - no, the battle against Yagura. I had pushed my young body further than it should have gone. There were hard limits to the kind of stress an undeveloped body could take, and I've just gone and inflicted the same damage again. Rather stupid of me, actually.

My sanity is slipping as my body shut down, black shadows curling over my sight. As the fourth tail began to manifest, I know that Kiri is doomed - there is no one left who is strong enough to stop a rampaging jinchuuriki, especially one that is well on his way to releasing his biju.

Then a hand bypasses the flailing shroud of chakra around my body and slams a tag into my stomach. With a sudden jerk, the wild energies around me freeze and reverse direction, spinning back into the Kyuubi's seal like a whirlpool. The blackness cleared, and my body starts up again, control restored to the rightful owner of the body - me. I look up into the face of my savior, and see the stern visage of the Old Man.

"I'm in trouble, aren't I."

He chuckles slightly, straightening up from his crouch over my prone body. "Oh yes, yes you are."

* * *

It was a rather embarrassing situation, both for Kiri and Konoha. Sarutobi had to deal with that fact that one of his genin had assaulted several members of another nation, without cause really. On the upside, Kiri had to confess that a six year old had distracted several of their ninja, outwitted the guards at the gate, and then overpowered two members of a three member chunin team. He chuckled to himself - it it weren't for the complication the brat ran into, he would have been able to defeat all three and be well on his way to Konoha right now.

As it was, the blond was strapped down to a hospital bed as a civilian doctor gave him basic first aid. Sitting with the Hokage by his bedside was the new leader of Kiri and her granddaughter. Funny how things worked out, actually.

"How long was I out, anyways." The brat was still mouthy, even when coming close to permanently crippling himself.

Ringo responded before Hiruzen could open his mouth. "Shut up, brat. Children should be seen and not heard. You most of all. Still, I suppose that's a fair question - Yagura was defeated two weeks ago, and you were put in a civilian hospital due to a lack of space in the ninja facilities. Really, you would have been fine with a little rest, but you just had to go and pull something like this."

She turned to the Hokage and arched a brow. "Please tell me he behaves better at home?"

Sarutobi shook his head and reached up to stroke his goatee. "I wish I could, but this was actually reasonably good behavior for him. After all, there was no wide scale property desecration."

At this, the blond grew indignant and spoke up in his defense. "Hey, I only did that once! It's not like it's my fault that the guards on the monument were slacking off. Besides, the paint washed off when it rained."

Ringo cocked her head and asked him, "Paint?"

"Yeah, you should have seen it! I got my hands on some artistic supplies and gave the Hokages a makeover. The First looked drunk, the Second was a clown, the Third was a chimp, and the Fourth was a geisha. Oh, I painted my own face up there too! Maybe I should do - mrph"

Sarutobi's hand clamped down over the brat's mouth squeezing his cheeks into the shape of a fish's. "No, I think we've had quite enough of your artistic pursuits, thank you very much."

In the background, the Hokage could hear a girl giggling. Oh, the kid would be getting it as soon as they got back to the village. Desperately changing the subject, he started to explain to Naruto what had happened over the last two weeks.

* * *

It was funny, really, how simple the command structure was for a village full of assassins for hire. Outside of the Kage, who had total authority over intra-village matters, there were few other positions of real authority. In name, the Daimyo was the sovereign lord of the village, but no one paid much more than lip service to that. There were often "councils" established by a Kage for greater insight into particular areas, but they had no official power outside of making suggestions. After the Kage, each village had its own structure, but they generally followed the same guidelines. You had a ninja who was the head of the genin, another for the chunin, and finally one for the jonin. There was an ANBU commander, and a head researcher. Everything else fell under the aforementioned jurisdiction. So, to take control of a village, all you really needed to do was replace the Kage, the genin, chunin, and jonin leaders, and appoint a new head ANBU and researcher.

During the period in which Yagura ruled, the functions of the rank leaders and the ANBU commander became essentially pointless, as every decision was made by the Kage. The research division was stripped and eventually shut down, leading to a distinct loss of support for the ninja of the village. Though this led to a general feeling of discontent for the higher ranked ninja, there was little they could do - Yagura was the most powerful being in the village by far, especially after the rebels defected due to his emerging policy of bloodline discrimination.

Thus, when Yagura was smacked around by the Third, and the rebels came back with a vengeance, the village was all too willing to roll over and surrender without a fight. Afterall, it's not like they wanted to be ruled by a tyrannical despot with a serious issue against clans. Ringo was summarily raised to Mizukage, against her protests, and the commanders for each division of ninja were quick to swear loyalty to her, as was the majority of the village.

The transition took approximately one week, mainly because of the paperwork that had to be filled out, and during that time, the Hokage was graciously hosted in the most luxurious house in the entire city. His every needs were met, and he was treated with a great deal of fear tinged respect. The village would probably start subtly suggesting he return to his own lands eventually, but probably not for a while.

He, on the other hand, was fully enjoying his long overdue vacation and was determined to milk it for all he could. After sending a messenger to Konoha detailing the situation, several jonin came to provide him an escort. For her part, Ringo did not mind terribly - not that there was not much she could do about it if she did - so she was more or less welcoming to the extremely dangerous personage camping out in her village.

It was not all relaxation for the Hokage, however, as he was heavily involved in rewriting several treaties between Konoha and the Mist, generally tipping things in Konoha's favor. During this time, however, Naruto was bored out of his mind - not exactly hard to do, anyways - and Sarutobi got sick of his whining within a handful of days after his awakening.

So, after calling over one of the ninja that came to "protect" him, he gave him the much wanted task of babysitting and sent the irritation and his new nanny back home. He'd be back shortly, just as soon as he got his fill of Naruto-free time. Probably about two months or so.

Eh. It's not like anything could go wrong with this, right?

* * *

Well, it's been fun, but the Old Man's right - I should probably be getting back to Konoha. Nice of him to assign me a guard though.

It turns out that my body is currently unsuited for using more than a quarter tail of the Kyuubi's chakra; any more, and I would start to damage myself. As it is, I've been restricted from even trying to use any for at least a year, to allow for my body to heal. Losing my ability to recover from wounds at a ridiculous pace is pretty annoying.

Anyways, I now have a tail, whose job is to shadow me from a distance until we return to Konoha, where he'll go off to do his thing, and I go back to report to Itachi. I get the feeling that meeting will be less than pleasant, but there's no avoiding it. There is, on the other hand, delaying it, so here I am, visiting the woman I saved a few weeks ago, Yuki something.

Well, she's pretty happy to see me in one piece, and she makes me sit as she serves tea and listens to my story. I'm kinda surprised she believes any of it, but I guess she's just really nice that way. About half way through, a young girl, around nine or ten, gracefully walks onto the wooden paneling of the room.

"Mother, there was a man waiting for you at the door. He presented me with this letter and asked that it make its way to your hands." Her voice is soft, and somewhat familiar. I look closer, trying to determine who this is.

"Thank you, dear. Did he say what his name was?" Yuki, Minami I think, extends a hand and accepts the outstretched paper. It's folded over, without an envelope, and bears no marks on the outside.

"I believe he stated his name to be Momochi Zabuza, mother." With those words, things start to click for me. Just as Minami's hand releases the letter in shock, I blurt out -

"Haku!"

"I'm sorry?" She turns to face me, and I gulp, frantically working out an excuse.

"No, no, I was just making sure I had your name right." She smiles a little bit and makes a slight bow in my direction.

"Indeed, that is my name. Yours, I believe, is Uzumaki Naruto, correct?"

I nod my head and relapse into silence. There's quite a bit of shock here - this is the girl who, over a century ago, gave me one of the base principles of my philosophy. It's hard to sit here and pretend everything's normal, but I somehow manage it. Then, I realize -

"You're a girl!"

* * *

After making a number of apologies to Haku, I take my leave of the Yuki family. I still haven't met the father, but Minami seems to be perturbed by the letter she received from Zabuza. Now there's a name I haven't thought of in a while; I wonder what he's up to, anyways.

Well, Minami presses a small box into my hands as I leave, and I place it in my new pouch that I was given by Mei, who couldn't stop laughing over the ridiculousness of the costume she first met me in. Gah - I liked her better as an adult, temptress though she may have been. The box rests next to the scroll I received from the Mizukage, which I had been told not to open til I reached Konoha.

I head back over the ocean, making a much better time that the first trip due to my having officially learned water walking. I glance back and see my shadow following behind me, just within sight, and I shake my head, focusing on the journey. This is going to be very, very, boring.

* * *

An old, dry voice cuts through the darkness.

A youth speaks up in protest, but is cut off by two other elders.

Beset from all sides, lacking anyone to turn to, he bends his head and asquices, though not without swearing his revenge.

The young man turns and leaves, not once looking back. Behind him, the three make plans for the future, making the most of the rare opportunity they have received.

The raven haired man, however, has his own plans - he is not alone in his desire for revenge.

* * *

Oh, the gates of Konoha. Two hundred feet tall and fifteen feet thick, they are opened once every morning, and closed when the sun sets. It's a marvelous ceremony to watch, as dozens of seals light up and the massive hulk moves ponderously towards its destination.

In all of Konoha's recorded history, there have been only three times that these gates have been breached, and one of those was me making a slight accident. The other two, I hope, will never happen.

The walls themselves are nothing to sneeze at, either. They stand fifty feet higher than the gate and ten feet thicker, with hundreds of thousands of delicate seals sandwiched inside. Chakra slides right of the surface, and the walls form the anchor for the barrier that monitors all chakra signals in the village.

These, unfortunately, have had the somewhat dubious distinction of being the most broken walls of all the villages, though the are amongst the toughest. Then again, the few times the other villages were invaded, their outer defenses were usually just skipped over.

I'm stalling outside, not wanting to go in and face Itachi, but I might as well get it over with. I nod to the gate guards and take a step into the village, then stop, hearing a "ping" echo inside my head, and the gifts I received from Kiri started to glow..

**CONGRATULATIONS.**

**COMPLETED:**

**SPECIAL MISSION: C-RANK: OFF TO SEA**

**3/5**

**REWARDS:**

**75 EXP (+25)**

**1000 RYO (+2000)**

**WATER WALKING TECHNIQUE**

**WATER WHIP TECHNIQUE**

**XXXX**

**WATER CLONE TECHNIQUE**

**INTRODUCTION TO SEALING (BOOK 1/5)**

**XXXX**

**LEVEL UP?**

**YES**

**NO**

****Hang on a second, after all that, this is it? Seventy five lousy exp, and I miss out on two rewards? Come on, do I actually have to kill things to get exp for defeating them? This is so not fair.

* * *

A/N: Alright, twenty chapters down! Well, this is the end of the first arc, and the video game aspect will be more prominent in the next. Also, we gave a huge and very obvious hint as to what's going to happen near the end of the chapter.

Yes, for those of you who asked, he only gets exp when he kills something or fulfills a specific mission objective. No partial credit on this difficulty.

Thanks for reading!


	21. Friends Made, Friends Lost

Monday morning, the start of a new week. I swing out of bed and pad to the kitchen for my morning cup of instant ramen. It's nowhere near as good as what Ichiraku makes, but it'll serve to wake me up. As the water boils, I move to the kitchen sink and wash my face, rubbing grime out of my eyes. I'll probably take a shower after I finish my morning training, and then I'll head over to see Itachi.

The whistle of the kettle distracts me from my plans, and I turn off the stove, pouring the steaming water into an opened cup of ramen. I cover it with a cloth and let it sit for a while as I return to my bedroom and reach under the bed for my equipment. Like any good ninja, I sleep in my combat uniform, eliminating the need to change out of nightclothes. Black canvas pants, with dozens of pockets, a dull orange jacket with hidden pockets sewn inside and out, and my headband slung around my neck. I fill my pockets with my supplies and strap on my weapon pouches.

I had made some serious modifications to my wardrobe yesterday, after reading through the book I received as a reward from the mission to Kiri. There were a number of simple seals scattered around my person, and there were several nasty surprises prepared for the next time I run into an opponent above my level.

Ah, that's three minutes passed - time to eat.

* * *

Uchiha Itachi was troubled. His face was blank, showing none of his internal turmoil, but his mind was racing, straining for a solution to the horrible choice he was faced with. Either he betrayed his village, breaking all the vows he had made as a ninja, or he betrayed his family and killed those of his own blood.

He fought the urge to laugh wildly - no matter what he did, there would be no coming back from his choice. He leaned against the rough bark of the tree behind him and looked into the sky. This was his own little haven; a small clearing set in the midst of a dense forest, bisected gently by a shallow river that gleamed in the sunlight. He had found it over a decade ago, and it remained his alone, unknown to all the world save one other.

Crackling noises reached his ears, and he tensed slightly before relaxing again, closing his eyes and looking down.

"Shisui. What brings you here?" The footsteps paused, then accelerated, the sound dropping down to near absolute silence.

"Ah, I was thinking that you could use someone to talk to - you seemed unsettled when I caught a glimpse of your face earlier." Short, spiky black hair, and a rather uncouth appearance - he could not be any more different from refined Itachi. Yet, though the two had their differences, they trusted each other above all the world.

"I - no, I cannot say this, but I must." Itachi slid down the tree and cradled his face in his hands. He looked up at his best friend, and spoke in a monotone. "I have been ordered to prevent internal strife in the village by removing the leaders of the suspected coup."

Shisui slumped down next to his friend and rested against his side. "Well, we better get started, then."

* * *

I hand in my report for the d-ranked mission I had taken earlier that morning, grimacing slightly. With a liberal use of water clones, it had taken me just under an hour to weed a public park, and the resulting exp reflected the lack of effort required.

I shake my head; one exp, was probably more that that mission even warranted anyways. Regardless, I need to get access to higher level missions, or find another way to increase my level. Yagura wasn't much of a threat as a ninja - outside of his overwhelming levels of chakra, he seemed relatively mediocre, actually. I snort - mediocre or not, it was a moot point, since the old man reduced him to a smear on the ground.

Speaking of which, there isn't much for me to do right now. D-rank missions won't really get me anywhere, and anything higher than that has to be authorized by the Hokage, since I'm a genin without a team. While this is somewhat annoying, it does free up time for me to advance some of my other plans. I wonder how many of my guinea pigs are in the village right now.

* * *

Fourteen year old Inuzuka Hana and her two idiot teammates, Hagane Kotetsu and Kamizuki Izumo, were reporting to the mission hall after the successful completion of their most recent mission, a c-rank escort to the Land of Tea, when a blond blur rushed past her. A light touch at her hip caused her to look down, seeing her pouch - which had the mission report - in the hands of a little kid who was waving up at her. With a jaunty salute and a playful grin, the kid dashed off into the main streets of Konoha.

"Kotetsu, Izumo, that kid - get him!"

Her chunin teammates obeyed her without question, used to following her orders in the field. They split up and flanked the kid, grabbing an arm each. Hana closed in and forced his chin up, looking him in the eyes.

"Alright, you've had your fun. Now, who are you and why did you do this?" Hana was irritated, and while she may have been able to control the tone of her voice, her three dogs were pacing behind her, hackles raised.

"Hey, who're you talking to? I'm over here!" A cheerful voice called out behind them, and leaning against the side of a building was a copy of the same blond the three of them held captive. The clone dissolved into a puddle of water, and the original ran up the wall and over the roof, cackling madly.

"Catch me if you can!"

* * *

Well, I guess they can't. Those three have the potential to become an excellent tracking and capture team, but I'd place their levels at fresh chunin - the ability is there, but a great deal of polishing is going to be necessary. I did, however, leave their mission report in a place to find.

Now, hopefully that would get those three to work harder, which means I should be able to leave them to their own devices for a while. The children of my generation are nowhere near ready to begin intensive training, so I'll have to dip into the older ninja.

Hana, Izumo, and Kotetsu form an effective group, as do Anko and Kurenai. Kakashi and Guy work best alone, but Asuma fits in with pretty much everyone - it's something that's probably inherited from his father. There are a good number of others who have the potential to become great, and I'm afraid that Konoha is going to need every last one of them.

Looks like I have my work cut out for me.

* * *

There was a note lying by the foot of the tree. It was slightly crumpled, but had been straightened out and pinned in place by a pair of smooth stones. River stones, most likely - that kind of natural polish was hard to find anywhere else.

Calloused hands lifted the letter, shaking as eyes swept over the words, once, then twice. With a single gesture and a sharp exhalation, the cheap paper burst into flames and drifted away as tiny motes of ash.

Feet turned and walked away, never to return to this place again. Their owner, having killed his heart once more, left to find the bank of a river and receive his best friend's last gift.

* * *

For the most part, there is little I can do to encourage my chosen ninja to improve, besides presenting them with goals to work towards. That, or embarrassing them. On the other hand, there are a few who I can influence with direct interference. On of those is idling away his time below me, reading a book in the shade of a tree. The area is secluded, and it took quite a bit of searching to locate him, but the results will be more than worth it. I can't see his face, as his gray hair curves over his forehead, but I know how intent he is on his reading. It's a trait that will stay with him his entire life. I steel myself for the coming conversation, then drop down next to him. His head jerks up and the sunlight glints off of his glasses.

"Hello, Kabuto."

* * *

Yakushi Kabuto was a complicated person. If you asked him who he was, he could give you a hundred different stories, all of which would be true, but none of them answering the question. As a matter of fact, he himself wasn't really sure who he was anymore. Honestly, he's not even sure if he ever knew who he was. All his life, he had been defined by those around him - first, the doctor who took him in, and more recently, the man who gave him missions.

As a ninja, however, he was quite sure of his skills. Though officially listed as a genin, he was easily at the level of an experienced chunin, and in some fields, such as infiltration and healing, he was far above even the average jonin. As such, it was quite a shock when the Kyuubi's container landed at his side. There had been no warning, and the jinchuuriki hadn't triggered Kabuto's not insignificant senses. He scrambled up, letting his book tumble to the ground, and discreetly palmed a kunai.

"Yes? Can I help you?" With his free hand, Kabuto reached up and straightened his glasses.

The blonde sat down and lay on his back, utterly relaxed. "You can actually. There're a couple things I'd like to talk to you about, so why don't you sit back down and relax."

Gingerly, Kabuto stepped back from the reclined jinchuuriki and knelt on the grass, hiding the kunai in the shadow cast by his legs. "I am afraid you have me at a disadvantage - you clearly know who I am, but I do not know even your name."

The container blew out a stream of air and reached over for a blade of grass to chew on. "Aww, don't give me that. You know who I am." He lifted a hand and beckoned, patting the ground next to him. "Seriously, put the blade away and unwind. I'm just here to talk for a bit."

Slowly, the kunai was tucked into a pouch and Kabuto let his tensed muscles release, just slightly. "Very well. Talk - I am listening."

"Well, I was wandering around one day, and this little birdie came up to me and told me a story about a boy who was an orphan, like me." He crosses his hands under his head, and looks into the sky. "See, this kid had no idea who his family was, had no memory of anything, actually. Well, he was taken in by a kind lady, who gave him both a name and a place to call home, and he loved it there. Still, there were moments where he was unsure of who he was, moments where he felt like he was just playing a part."

Kabuto's jaw clenched, but he let the narration continue uninterrupted. "Things probably would have been fine, if it wasn't for an overheard conversation between the woman who cared for him and the man he would come to know as a cruel taskmaster." The jinchuuriki sat up and stared at him, with a gaze that was far too old for his body. "That was where the problems started, wasn't it. So many missions, each giving you a new identity. You were one of the best, because you didn't have any attachments to a primary ego. Problem is, you can only play so many parts before you lose the ability to tell the difference between reality and a lie. So why don't you tell me - who are you?"

A near invisible flinch in followed by a friendly smile. "Well, you seem to know who I am. My name is -"

The blond shoots to his feet, towering over the older ninja. "Don't give me that crap. You know exactly what I mean. Answer the damn question!"

"I -" He stopped. It's true, he didn't know who he was anymore. "Fine! I don't know who I am - why is any of this of concern to you?"

The jinchuuriki - no, Uzumaki Naruto - walked over and extended a hand, smiling warmly. "You know, orphans may not have a family, but we damn well stick together. I don't want the soft spoken medical student, or the thousand identities from Root - I want the real you, even if you don't know him yet. Join me, Kabuto, and find yourself."

With a shaking hand, Yakushi Kabuto reached up towards the child six years his junior physically, but so much older mentally.

****"Thank you."

* * *

A/N: Alright, we don't really have any excuses for how late this is, besides real life being ...very annoying... and emotional scenes of any kind being difficult for us to write. Also, the plot will pick up as of next chapter, and certain complaints (quite justified, actually) about the lack of video game mechanics will be answered.

Hope you like the chapter! Drop a note if you have any thoughts to share.


	22. Science, Bitches!

The Hokage, or any Kage technically speaking, is supposed to be the most powerful ninja in a village. Granted, that's not the only requirement, but it's a pretty big part of the job. However, there are often other ninja who could give their leader a run for their money. In Konoha, it was generally acknowledged that the Third Hokage was the village's most powerful living ninja, by a wide margin, but the battle for second place was a heated one.

His teammates - Koharu Utatane and Homura Mitokado, currently serving as his advisors - were skilled ninja, but while they had a wealth of experience to draw from, neither had the sheer power to back it up. Among the elder generation, in fact, there was only one other ninja who could hope to match the Hokage, and that was his erstwhile rival Shimura Danzo. Of course, that was prior to the debilitating injuries he suffered in the years before the Third War, injuries that led to his retirement as an active ninja.

Then there were the Sannin, two of whom were rarely in the village, the final being a traitor of the highest order. Individually, none of them were a match for their old teacher, but the three of them together formed a force much more potent than they did apart, each covering for the other's weaknesses. Hatake Sakumo, the deceased White Fang, was greater than any one member of the Sannin, but having taken his own life in shame, his legacy was passed down to his talented but emotionally damaged son.

The Hokage's own family had a strong candidate for the position as well, with twenty two year old Sarutobi Asuma securing himself a place amongst the Daimyo's elite bodyguards. Here and there, other talents existed, but the two greatest rising stars of the new generation were the Uchiha "brothers" - though they were only cousins, they were closer than the average married couple. Uchiha Shisui, famed for his mastery of the body flicker, and Uchiha Itachi, one who excelled in all aspects of being a ninja, having absolutely no weaknesses.

The fourteen year olds were both jonin, having risen through the ranks at an astronomical rate, and rumors abounded at a possible chance of an Uchiha taking the tri-cornered hat. It was understandable, then, that the village was thrown into an uproar when the dead body of Uchiha Shisui was found floating face-down in a river, his snapped katana planted solidly between his shoulders.

* * *

"So it begins." A cloaked man drew a small fan from under a fold in his concealing garment and snapped it open in front of his shadowed face. "The forest burns, paving the way for new life to grow. Thus is has always been, and thus the world turns."

With a sharp gesture, the hooded man collapsed the fan and pointed at the stone wall in front of him, bearing the red and white uchiwa, symbol of a mighty clan. His right eye spun in a mesmerizing pattern, and he spoke but one more word.

"Amaterasu."

* * *

The meeting with Kabuto a few days ago was more nerve wracking than I thought it would be, even with the decades of experience I have over him and the years of research I had done into his life. I'm not ashamed at all to admit that he scares the crap out of me - even as a kid he's got to be the creepiest person I've ever met, and that's saying something. On the other hand, I more or less understand what makes him tick, and though it took a while, I'm fairly certain that he's on my side. Somewhat, anyways. It'll be awhile before I can trust him at all, but this much I'm sure of - if Kabuto ever truly gives his loyalty to anyone, it will be theirs forever.

All things considered, my plans are rolling along smoothly. The current crop of chunin and jonin I have my eye on are intrigued - and irritated - by yours truly, and most of them are putting more effort into their training than they would have otherwise. It's not a huge difference, but every little thing counts. On that note, I should probably head off to do another d-rank before the sun sets. The experience gain might be nearly negligible, but there are other benefits to the mission. The most important one is probably the money I make from them. Since I became a ninja, I'm effectively an adult, which means the money I received as an unsupported orphan has been taken away. It's kind of annoying that I spend years as the leader of a country, and then get reduced to scrounging for money to eat.

Seriously, I really need another c-rank. They pay exponentially better, but genin aren't allowed to request missions higher than d-rank without approval from their a jonin sponsor. As I have an instructor, no other jonin is allowed to interfere with my training, meaning that I have to go find Itachi if I want anything, and he's been rather scarce of late. As a matter of fact, I've barely seen him a handful of times since I got back - after the cursory debrief and an aborted training session, he hasn't contacted me at all.

I suppose I could drop by the Uchiha compound, but they're really not my favorite people in the world. Then again, all I'll be doing is asking for Itachi - it's not like I'll have to go inside.

The things I do for money.

* * *

**GAME SAVED.**

Wait, what the hell? All I did was knock on the main gate to the Uchiha complex, which, coincidently, is slightly ajar. This is really not good. I push the heavy wooden slab out of the way, noting the lack of noise that signified regular maintenance, and step into the silent compound. The Uchiha clan owned a corner of the village, and inside are several large houses that held the clan members and several auxiliary buildings that have a number of uses. Some of them I know are sparring halls, others are libraries that hold some of the simpler techniques the uchiha have copied over the years, and others are probably used as shops during the day.

For such a populated area, the place is pretty quiet. I take a few more steps onto the grounds, looking for a member of the clan to talk to, when a pulse of some kind sweeps over me.

**CHALLENGE: HE WHO WALKS IN FIRE**

Again? I have no idea what's going on, but -

_Crackkk!_

An explosion of black fire erupts over the roof of the buildings in the back of the complex, and screams rise through the air, shattering the silence. The Uchiha compound is burning, falling prey to vicious torrents of putrid black flames that envelop even stone and leave behind nothing but ash. A man strides out of the shadows cast by the dark fires and drags behind him a massive war fan, red eyes spinning in a hypnotizing pattern. Impossible. There's no way that's Itachi, but the only other person with a Mangekyo is -

**UCHIHA MADARA* - JONIN*, LVL 40***

**STRENGTH - 136***

**CONSTITUTION - 125***

**DEXTERITY - 213***

**INTELLIGENCE - 187***

**WISDOM - 174***

**CHARISMA - 150***

**SPEED - 256***

**CHAKRA - 622***

**CHAKRA CONTROL - *X8***

**SPECIALTIES: BLOODLINE TECHNIQUES, LONG-RANGE FIRE TECHNIQUES, LAYERED WIDE AREA GENJUTSU, HIGH SPEED COMBAT**

**BOUNTY: 90,000 RYO***

**DANGER: A-RANK***

**THREAT: HIGH***

**REWARD FOR SURVIVAL: SAVE CRYSTAL**

What. The. Hell. Not only do I have to fight Madara when I'm six, every single one of his stats has a little ***** after it, which, in my experience, never means anything good. I'm very, very dead.

"**Stats** and **skills**."

**UZUMAKI NARUTO - GENIN, LVL 25**

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 76**

**CONSTITUTION - 100**

**DEXTERITY - 55**

**INTELLIGENCE - 70**

**WISDOM - 92**

**CHARISMA - 140**

**SPEED - 46**

**CHAKRA: 1352**

**CHAKRA CONTROL: *X2**

**SKILLS:**

**BODY**

**- ADVANCED CHAKRA CONTROL (1/1)**

**MIND**

**- KNOWLEDGE IS POWER (3/3)**

**- - EYE OF THE MIND (2/10)**

**SPECIAL**

**- HEAR MY ROAR (9/9)**

**- - TO CHAIN THE BEAST (10/45)**

**CLASS**

**- RAIN OF FIRE (1/1)**

**- RAM (1/1)**

**- STONE COLD (1/1)**

What the hell. Let's do this.

* * *

There's no pre-fight banter, not that I was actually expecting much. As far as Madara's concerned, I'm just some kid that's wandered in here accidently. On that note, I have no idea why Madara's here now, or even here at all, but this really isn't the time for idle musing. It's time to pull out all the stops.

I gather my chakra and form three water clones, sealessly. My mastery of water techniques is currently subpar for this little trick, as is my basic chakra control, but the family of clone techniques happens to be my specialty - there isn't a ninja alive that can match me with them. Granted, the shadow clone is still my favorite, but they all have their uses.

The display of skill seems to have caught Madara's attention, and he flicks a narrow bolt of fire my way with nothing more than a swipe of his hand. The narrow flame speeds towards me, and I direct one of my clones to shield me.

_Whsssst!_

The resulting spray of steam gives me time to draw a pair of kunai from my rather limited supply set - I had really not been prepared for a life or death battle this afternoon - and direct my clones to flank my enemy. Using water techniques without a ready source of water is tricky, as there's only so much moisture in the air or the human body that can be drawn upon easily. There are, however, a number of workarounds for these sorts of situations.

A huge gust of wind carves through my pathetic screen of steam, forcing me to anchor myself to the ground or else be blown away. I charge through the aftermath, sprinting at the stationary Madara, who looks to be more amused than anything else. He allows me to close to within a few feet, then raises his massive fan into the air and sweeps it in front of him. Planting my feet into the ground, I tense and lean into the blow, taking the full force on my right shoulder. It impact sends me flying into the air, spinning uncontrollably.

The moment his shoulders finish the rotational movement required to move his bulky weapon, my two surviving clones use the water that makes them up to launch two water whips, snaking through the burning air at his unguarded side. He scoffs; with a firm stamp, a slab of stone juts out of the ground and shatters the streams. I capitalize on this - he's looking away from me, and he's in a horrible position to counter anything I do. Without pausing, I yank on the kyuubi's chakra, shooting from one tail straight to four, the blood red pulsating mass surrounding me like liquid fire. I don't bother trying to maintain control over the chakra - I use it like a hammer, all force and no finesse.

A massive column of pitch black flames erupts below me, swallowing my chakra coat and burning it away, layer by layer. With the lack of density that results from my inability to control the four tails worth of chakra the shroud puts up little resistance to the scorching heat, but it lasts long enough for me to get a kunai within inches of Madara's head. Just fractions of a centimeter separate us when a vortex opens in the air, pulling both the kunai and half my arm into another dimension. I cry out in pain as my arm gushes blood, and the last thing I see is the rigid edge of the fan coming down over my windpipe.

* * *

**GAME OVER.**

Shit, really? I died? I didn't even get past six years old.

Well, here I am again, staring into space in a gray, featureless void. If I remember correctly, the only way to get out of this was to say -

"**Continue**."

**CONTINUE**

**-YES**

**-NO**

Okay, replying 'no' last time took me to the main menu, so I might as well go with the other option.

"**Yes**."

The world spins around me, with unheard of colors flashing through my ears. Wait, what? My eyes see spicy sounds, I'm hearing colors, and I'm pretty sure that I can light.

This is seriously more trouble than it's worth.

* * *

With a flash, I find myself standing outside the main gate of the Uchiha complex, which looks completely normal. I guess dying forces me back to my last save, which could come in handy. The problem is, there's no way I can fairly beat Madara as I am now - I'd need a huge amount of preparation time to even try to come out of an encounter with him alive.

Fine then, I can't beat him fairly. So what - we're ninja. Time to cheat.

I hightail it back to my apartment, running over options in my head. In any kind of straight up battle I plan out I lose without a doubt, which means that this is going to have to be done like an assassination. With his Sharingan being permanently activated, there's no way to really sneak up on him, which means this is going to have to be both long ranged and faster than he is, but powerful enough to kill him in one shot, since that's all I'm getting.

I grin. Mayhem from a distance, and completely by surprise to boot - it's right up my alley.

* * *

I park myself on the top of the Hokage monument, the beginner's book on sealing clutched in my left hand. This next part's going to be a little tricky, but I should be able to set it up within half an hour.

There's a pool farther back on the monument, surrounded by ancient trees transplanted here by the First Hokage himself. They're imbued with decades worth of natural chakra, more than enough for what I need.

Laying my supplies by the side of the grove, I strip and fold my clothes neatly. I wade into the pool, feeling the icy chill seep into my bones. it's unpleasant, but necessary for what I'm about to do.

Every type of clone has it's strengths and weaknesses, as well as little quirks that make them more or less useful depending on the situation. The water clone is one of the stronger clones in terms of durability, but it's among the stupidest. It requires semi-constant supervision for it to perform most actions, and it has little to no initiative on it's own. On the plus side they're cheap, costing a fraction of what it would take to create a shadow clone, as long as there was a sufficient source of water nearby.

As the frigid water of the pond closes over my head, I bring my hands together and deliberately move through the seals required for a water clone. My chakra leaves my body in a near solid wave, grappling with the water around me and forcing into my image. As I continue to pour water into the technique, the pond begins to empty, until the level of the water was just below my knees.

I open my eyes, and look at the assembled clones around me. There are almost two thousand copies of me standin on the top of the Monument, and I allow myself a small grin. Part one complete.

* * *

Hatake Kakashi was heading towards the top of the Hokage monument at a leisurely pace, curious as to the cause of the large spike in chakra levels. Though not a sensor himself, there was enough energy being released for him to feel it all the way from his apartment. About a mile from the stairs leading up the mountain, he paused and stiffened as a flash of malevolent chakra split the air. It was instantly recognizable - no one who had fought against the beast could ever forget the vile taint of the Kyuubi's energies. He crouched, ready to rocket up the stone facade, when yet another eruption of chakra triggered his sense. He whirled in surprise, and froze, numb, as a massive inferno ripped through the Uchiha complex.

The kid could wait - as far as he could tell, the fox's chakra was under control. That black blaze, however...

No, he'd be back to check on the kid later. There was a slightly more pressing problem to take care of right now.

* * *

The Kyuubi's chakra has a number of interesting properties, and one of the lesser known is it's sheer alienness. It didn't really mix well with other types of energy, sliding past them or simply overwhelming everything with it's potency. As a result, it can affect the physical form of something without changing it's more esoteric properties.

Using two tails of the fox's chakra to reduce one of the massive trees to ash had the interesting side effect of netting me a great deal of chakra enhanced colloidal particles. Mixing this with the pure water left over from the pon created a greasy black sludge - a rather inefficient substitute for real chakra conducting ink, but that stuff was ridiculously expensive, and took forever to make properly. I settled myself into the center of the muck, spreading the remnants of my own chakra throughout the mix. The eruption of fire in the village reminded me that the clock was ticking, and I hurried through the rest of my plan.

I sent a number of clones down into the city to retrieve a couple of lampposts, and directed the rest to start marking up the Fourth's head. It's only right that I use this on the head of the master of the Flying Thunder God technique.

That, and there's probably still some resentment left towards him that I have yet to work out.

* * *

If anyone was watching Konoha from a distance, they would see a towering column of black flames, bending left and right against the wind. If that person was also a student of the more obscure ninja techniques, they might even recognize the flames as being one of the Uchiha clan's forbidden skills, Amaterasu, which created flames that burned nearly everything, and would burn nonstop for seven days and nights.

However, there were only a handful of people in the world who would have any clue as to what was making the bright light off to the side, above the Hokage Monument.

_Whssst...zzzt...CRAAACKKK!_

The sky flashed white and a rolling wave of sound washed over the village, shattering every window within a three mile radius. A massive bolt of light shot from the tip of the Fourth's head, screaming through the air as it lanced towards the Uchiha compound, leaving a blazing trail in the sky.

_BOOM!_

* * *

From my vantage point above the village it's as if a second sun drops onto the Uchiha's land. The earth is shaking and there's a shockwave radiating from the impact point that flattens everything nearby.

The actual technique isn't very complicated, or even all that practical, to be honest. Setting up a simple but massive array that converted chakra to electricity and set that energy flowing in parallel tracks towards a general direction in a sudden release only really uses seals that are found in the beginner's edition of the sealing manual I have. There are only three things that I really add - the sheer scope of the combination, the exact setup itself, and the energy to power the thing. To be more accurate, it was the Kyuubi that powered it, or four tails worth of it's chakra, anyways. The movement of the electricity created a crude but powerful launcher, capable of shooting the lampposts I borrowed at speeds high enough to liquefy the metal. The roiling ball of superheated material smashed through the Uchiha complex and flattened everything nearby, whether it was wood, metal, stone, or one Uchiha Madara.

And people complained I didn't pay attention in school.

* * *

A/N: Alright, this chapter was pretty fun to write. For those of you who don't know what a railgun is, go look it up - they're pretty awesome. On the other hand, we do admit we took some liberties with how they work, since the actual explanation was a bit more complicated than we wanted to get into.

Tell us what you think!


	23. Junk Food can Kill

Running four tails worth of the Kyuubi's chakra through my body in a giant burst isn't exactly healthy. The last time I tried this, Madara killed me before I could feel any of the pain - this time, I get the full package. My bones are cracked, my muscles torn, my skin's been stripped of my body - and the best part is, it's not healing. This was not one of my better ideas.

The good news is, I - and a good chunk of the Fourth's head - are falling to the ground at speeds high enough to leave me a smear on the ground.

I guess the stabilizing seals weren't quite up to snuff. If I had rotated the back half twenty three degrees to the left and put on a three part containment seal to catch the extra backlash, there might -

_Splat._

* * *

**GAME OVER.**

No, seriously, I get it. I die, poof - game over. There isn't exactly a need to remind me every single time.

Here we go again. Time to set up the giant cannons and not kill myself this time around. Speaking of murder, I probably caused quite a bit of collateral damage. Eh, never really liked the Uchiha anyways.

Then again, mass murder is illegal, and it's not like I can play dumb about where the giant superheated ball of death was fired from...bah.

"**Continue**. **Yes**."

"Time for plan B, I guess. Now, was that the one with the flaming..."

* * *

"...and the thirty pounds of flour, or was it - oh look, I'm back. Hello, world." Probably not a great attitude to have after vaporised a few dozen people and then falling to my death, but the whole thing gets kinda old after the first few times.

The situation I'm in is slightly problematic, though. It's been a long time since I've been so thoroughly outclassed, and with access to so few resources to boot. Might as well start checking off the ways that I can't win.

First, taijutsu is out the window - he's stronger, faster, more durable, and has nearly twice the reach. He can overpower me with ninjutsu, has nearly half the reserves that I do, and I only have access to a handful of techniques. Genjutsu isn't even a question - he's a master and I got nothing. The Kyuubi's chakra can be suppressed with his eyes, and going up to levels high enough to do any damage would kill me first. The only thing I have going for me is fuuinjutsu, and I don't exactly happen to have a ton of ink and paper handy, not to mention the restriction on creating or charging seals higher than my current education level.

Seriously, whoever came up with this is a sadistic piece of work. I'd like to see any other six year old last twenty seconds in there - it's like the game is evolving to negate my biggest advantage.

Nah, can't be.

Either way, I need something to win, something that he'll never expect. I sprint back from the Uchiha compound gates to the nearest shopping complex and look around, seeing a tailory, a butcher's, a stationary shop, a grocer's and a small stand serving dango and okonomiyaki. I start to grin a little - what I'm about to do is both illegal and unethical, but the best things often are.

As it's close to sunset, all the shops except the food stall are closed for the night, so it's the work of a few seconds to pop the locks on the back doors and take what I need. From the butcher's, three of the biggest cleavers I can find, along with several bags of flour and a giant bottle of oil from the grocers. The tailory nets me a huge bolt of raw cotton, and I liberate several bottles of iron gall ink, a small bowl, and a calligraphy brush. Time to get to work.

* * *

The difference between the last idea I had and the current project I'm working on is one of both scale and finesse. Since the target area is much smaller, I can use real ink chakra-bonded with my blood instead of a jury rigged mixture of chakra infused ash and water. With a three to one ratio of ink to blood, I spend a few minutes personally binding the blood to the slightly acidic ink, until they are indistinguishable from one another.

A water clone has thrown open the roll of fabric and is cutting it into precise sections, while another is cutting the flour bags into smaller pouches and breaking up chunks of the powder in to small, smooth particles. A few more clones are sent out to incapacitate the stall owner and take the remaining materials I need.

Just as I finish with the ink, a clone returns with a needle and heavy thread from the tailory, and I grab the first piece of cloth and get to work. Finished with their work, the five of the six free clones I've created switch to using kunai to pound grooves in the flat metal of the butcher's knives and a thick iron pan taken from the street vendor. The last is using the fine tip of a senbon to carve into a collection of wooden skewers that used to hold dango.

They tasted pretty good, but I've had better.

* * *

Uchiha Itachi was fighting for his life. Against an enemy he could not hope to defeat, he fought with all the skill he had, not to protect his own life, or his family, but to safeguard his village. Even his best, however, could barely scratch the man he was fighting. Every attack, every genius stratagem was countered nearly instantly, as if this man, this monster, had seen it all before.

His enemy bore the eyes of an Uchiha, and fought like on as well, but there was no Uchiha in recent memory that looked like him. The kusarigama with a massive gunbai in place of a fundo was a distinctive weapon, and had not been used since the time of his ancestor, Madara - his ancestor who had been killed by the First Hokage decades ago.

The more he looked, however, the more the signs pointed that way. The red layered armor, the wild mane of black hair, the weapon, even the Mangekyo in his eyes, they all pointed at a dead man. Even if he was alive, he was nowhere near as old as he should be. If Madara had somehow survived till the present day he would be over ninety years old, but the man in front of him looked no older than fifty. Outside of a few strands of white hair and creases around his eyes and mouth, there were no real visible marks of age.

The point was moot, however, since Itachi was a little more concerned with trying to stay alive than ruminate over the possible identity of his attacker. It was somewhat ironic, really. He had arrived prepared to kill the Uchiha who were conspiring against his Hokage, and had ended up fighting another Uchiha who seemed to have the same idea, except on a larger scale. When he had arrived at the compound, the masked man had been burning down buildings indiscriminately with the black flames of Amaterasu, a power that Itachi himself had only just recently aquired. This man, however, was using the flames as a toy, teasingly lashing out at buildings and people alike, letting the unquenchable fires do his work.

Using the power granted to him by his best friend's death, Itachi started sealing the flames away from the residential portions of the clan holding, drawing the man's attention to him in the process. Then began the most difficult battle he had ever faced in his fourteen years of life.

He was being toyed with; he knew that for a fact. The man had any number of opportunities to finish him, but he always held back, allowing Itachi to scramble away at the last second. Genjutsu flew like flies, Itachi remaining unable to trap the man for more than a few seconds, but maintaining his own grasp on reality. His ninjutsu were simply overpowered by the man's mastery of Amaterasu, and in the spaces where he was able to clear the field of the flames, the enormous blasts of wind from the fan drove him back. Getting close was nearly suicidal, as the man was no less adept with his weapons that his other techniques; Itachi bore the wounds to prove that.

He was still fighting, but his limit was approaching. His left arm was crippled by a gash to his bicep that carved through the muscle and nicked the bone, and his sight was starting to blur from the strain of constantly sealing away the black flames that threatened to burn down his entire village. There would be no help coming from the rest of Konoha's ninja, as the complex was ringed with flames that resisted all efforts to extinguish them and burnt any ninja who tried to cross to a crisp.

Imagine his surprise then, when a small form barreled through the flames and interrupted his struggle.

Wait a minute - it was a blond child with blue eyes and whisker marks. Naruto? What was he doing here?

More importantly, what was he wearing?

* * *

While this is a better idea than my last one, that doesn't mean that it was a good one.

I'm wearing a crudely stitched overlayer of sealed cloth, cloth that drinks in the flames around me and spits them out behind me. The Flame Sealing Method is a simple way to draw nearby heat sources into a storage seal and hold them in stasis. Dealing with Amaterasu is a bit trickier. The flames are powerful enough to burn through an average seal in minutes, so the more advanced brother of the Flame Sealing Method is required. As usual, however, there is a work around. Storing the unquenchable flames is difficult; merely drawing them in and expelling them immediately after just requires a little bit of creative brushwork.

The downside is running around with a jet of fire coming from your back. If I stop moving, the flames will wrap back around and toast me, and there's also a slight propulsion effect that pushes me forward. It's not exactly ideal, but it does let me get extra air time when jumping, and allows me to maneuver in mid air by twisting around.

Time for round two.

Drawing my modified cleaver in one hand and holding the purloined iron cooking surface in the other, I charge at Madara like a knight of old dressed in burning cloth armor. Not exactly a romantic image, but I'll take what I can get.

He still isn't taking me seriously, for which I'm thankful. There's a person lying under his foot, face down, and all I can tell is that it's an Uchiha. He seems to be a bit preoccupied with his original opponent, which suits me just fine as I get within five feet of him. I swing at him as fast as I can, and the cleaver, barely a foot and a half long from tip to base, slashes by harmlessly,

He must have some kind of crazy reflexes, since the chakra extension that spears out from the seal encrusted blade just grazes his armor and cuts a gash in the metal. I hope he gets good deals on repairs, because it's a pain to forge quality armor. Without further ado, I jump over his head, boosted by the flames from my posterior, and stab downwards. The seals I etched into the the metal react to the chakra I flood the knife with, drinking it in and expelling it in the shape of a curved blade nearly seven feet long.

I can't hold the shape for too long without damaging the metal beyond use, but the changing blade lengths is playing havoc with his perception. The Sharingan can see chakra, of course, but only when it's expressed outside the body. Hence, internal manipulation and sealless techniques are exempt from both their prediction abilities and copying. To him, it looks like my blade is randomly extending without any input from me.

While this would probably be more than a normal ninja could handle, any skilled ninja can compensate for the possible blade lengths and just stay away from the point of the knife. If I have more time and better materials, I could probably make the chakra bend as well, but I have to make do with what's available. Anyways, it'd be nice if this was enough to do him in, but all it's really for is to keep his eyes focused on the flickering cleaver.

I manage to score his armor again, this time along the left shoulder, and he drastically speeds up, spinning the sickle in his right hand around his head and hurling it at me as he flies backwards. I run headlong into the oncoming steel, ignoring the vaguely familiar voice from below me, and smash my makeshift shield into the projectile. A ripple of light travels across the iron from the point of impact as the carved seals light up, absorbing the sickle's kinetic energy and bouncing it back, sending it spinning aimlessly into the sky.

Madara pulls the chain to reel it back in, but as an expert flail user myself, I know exactly how long I have before he regains possession of the weapon. He's still in the air, having jumped back a moment ago, and as I rush towards him, my speed doubles, then triples. Unseen to my enemy, the soles of my standard issue combat sandals have been marked as well, with pulses of chakra erupting from my feet at every step and shooting me forward. The rubber begins to disintegrate under the energy, but the footwear has served its purpose. I'm within striking range of the Uchiha, ready to finish him.

Just as I thrust forward, he drops his weapon and brings his hands together. The chakra projected from my cleaver sinks into a log and splits it lengthwise. Damn replacement technique.

I spin around and see four copies of the red eyed ninja, standing in a loose semicircle. Without pause, I flood chakra into my blade and complete the spin, travelling a full three hundred and sixty degrees. The cleaver warps and shatters, the untreated steel unable to bear the strain of channeling such a quantity of chakra. I hear the telltale poof that signals the destruction of a shadow clone, but as I turn back around, the other three are revealed to be basic illusionary clones. I look around for the Uchiha, but as I face the gate, a six spinning black tomoe in the shape of a stylized 'y' encompass my entire field of vision. The world around me spins and hundreds of copies of Madara appear, alongside rotting rotting skeletons that shamble towards me bearing rusty yet fully serviceable weapons. Huh. Never knew he was such a fan of the classics.

I smile as I realize he thinks I'm trapped in an illusion. Really, did he expect me to walk into a fight with an Uchiha and not come prepared for genjutsu?

Right on cue, a seal over my upper left shoulder lights up, as it has been doing periodically for the entire fight, and stabs a tiny needle of stored chakra into the muscle there. The pain breaks the illusion, and I see a fist headed straight for my throat. I yank up my shield and catch his knuckles on the rim, the seals activating and returning the force of his killing blow.

_Crunch._

Oh yeah, score one for the blond team. His hand is damaged, with several bones cracked, if not outright snapped, and I jump through another patch of the ever present black flames to fuel a leap towards the person he was standing over previously. Anyone who can stall him at all would be an asset in this fight, especially if they're capable of -

"Itachi?" What the hell is he doing here? Oh, shit, does that mean I vaporised him too, last time. Good thing I -

_Crash...BOOM._

Ugh. I look up and see Madara pulling back his leg from where he kicked me into a wall. Bastard caught me completely by surprise.

He claps his hands and spits out a massive, white hot dragon of fire that sinuously streams towards me. Reaching down to a seal on my hip, I release the second cleaver I modified, holding it out in front of me, making sure the twin seals on the inside of wrists are touching the corresponding seal on the handle.

The dragon impacts the blade and forces me back a step, the remnants of my sandals tearing as I anchor myself to the ground. Never did like those things anyways.

Instead of burning me to a crisp, the flames narrow to a point and funnel into the blade. The absorbed chakra streams from the metal into the handle, following a network of seals that forms a circuit around my shoulders and back into the handle. The dragon seems to leap back from the point of my knife and hurtle towards Madara, who's unaware of the redirection of his technique, hidden as it is in the horizontal column of flame that stretched between us.

It's pretty obvious when the technique connects with its user, because the fire that was once compresses into a specific shape explodes, lashing out at the surroundings. The second cleaver in my hands is useless as well; the intense heat melted the metal to the point where it's less a blade and more a lump of metal on a blackened handle. My hands aren't spared the damage either - the skin on the inside of each palm is blistered and raw. With a hiss, I discard the destroyed cleaver and charge at the epicenter of the blast, drawing a simple kunai as I run.

The smoke clears in a gust of wind, and Madara reappears, having reclaimed his war fan and sickle. He certainly didn't escape the fire unscathed - there are blackened patches all over his armor, and his hair is singed. Most telling is the scorched skin that oozes blood, stretching from his hands up to his elbows. He might still be able to fight, but he's going to have a hell of a time using any jutsu. He seems to realize the same thing, and closes his eyes for a second, opening them to reveal the twin 'y's' of his Mangekyo spinning fast enough to be a blur. I immediately avert my gaze, not wanting to fall victim to Tsukiyomi, but realize a second later that I needn't have bothered.

_Whoosh...creak...smash!_

A deep purple glare is cast over the battlefield as Madara straightens, enveloped by the massive skeleton that is known as the Uchiha's forbidden guardian technique, Susano-o. It's hailed as an unbreakable defense, capable of weathering attacks from entire armies.

Of course, what they don't mention is it's been broken, has a slight weak spot, but most importantly, drains enough chakra from the user to practically be considered a suicide technique. With the amount of black flame being thrown around, coupled with the combat he's been in, there's no way Madara has the reserves required to hold this for long.

On the other hand, it's pretty much a finishing technique - one hit from the sword on the thing and I'm toast.

As if mocking my thoughts, the skeletal warrior raises its massive blade and swings it down, aiming right at me. I replace myself with the split log from earlier and get out of the way, but the impact throws me to the ground. The blade is raised again, and it falls towards me as I still lie on my back, dazed. I raise my shield to cover my body and hope that my math was right, or I'm about to be split in twain.

_Clang! Crack...snap._

The makeshift shield does its job, forcing the ethereal blade into the air once more, but shatters into pieces afterwards. I roll to the side and get up running, heading for the shelter of one of the few standing buildings in the compound. The giant blade swings again, taking off the top of the building, and I hear high pitched screaming and crying from the now open rooms.

Crap, there's children in there.

I draw my third, and final, blade, pumping in all the chakra I can spare. So much energy is being held by the single seal on the blade that the metal is actually glowing from the excess chakra expressed as heat. The wooden handle blackens and warps, burning it's shape into my hand, but I ignore the pain and watch for the blade to come down once more. The moment it begins to fall, I cut off the flow of chakra to the blindingly bright knife and use the last bit of chakra I stored to activate the last set of seals on my tattered cloth suit.

_Whhsst...CRUMPT_!

The explosion fires me backwards through a few walls, most made of solid stone that collapsed as I passed through. I hit something extremely solid, and the overworked seals on my suit give up the ghost and fail, overloading and turning the cloth they were inscribed on into ash. I hit my head on a table and start to black out.

Damn cheap ink.

* * *

I come back to consciousness a little while later, feeling my real age for once. Everything hurts, and my skin is burnt all over. The good news is my internal organs seems to be mostly undamaged, and outside of a few fractures and mild tears, my bones and muscles are still fine.

As far as I can tell, not too much time has passed, but I need to back out there now, before Madara gets away. Or kills Itachi - I couldn't really care less about what happens to the rest of the clan.

Drawing a pair of kunai from a pouch that somehow managed to stay attached to my thigh, I follow my trail of destruction back the way I came, stepping over rubble and dead bodies alike. When I get back to the battle, I see something that freezes me in my track. Instead of Madara causing wanton destruction, I see a fourteen year old Itachi fighting like a berserker, pushing the armored man back.

Forget flashy ninjutsu and showy techniques - Itachi is attacking with a combination of exploding clones, minor genjutsu, quick replacements, and lightning fast stabs with a kunai, complemented with curving shuriken bearing razor sharp wires. It was a sight I hadn't seen in over a century - the ice cold ferocity and absolute mental control that made the ninja in front of me a legend, even to the last day he fought, sick and blind.

The wounded Madara was being tossed around, just able to prevent fatal wounds. With the drain from using Susano-o, coupled with the burns on his lower arms, he was reduced to maybe a third of his strength. I watch breathlessly, knowing that I should step in and help, but unwilling to disrupt the beauty of the fight.

Unfortunately, it is over all too soon. Itachi, however much of a genius he is, still has to deal with the limitations imposed on him by his body. Tired, wounded, and under great pressure, he finally slips. One of his blows is weaker than it should be, and Madara capitalizes on it, seizing the arm between his forearms and twisting, snapping the bone. As Itachi loses his rhythm, Madara steps in and forces his blackened hand to grasp Itachi's throat, digging in his fingers until they were leaving deep marks on the skin.

He leans forward and whispers something into Itachi's ear, but he is facing away from me and I can't hear what he says. Itachi's response, however, is more than clear. He raises his head and looks into Madara's eyes, Mangekyo spinning.

"Tsukiyomi."

As Madara's hand slackens and Itachi wheezes, I'm hard pressed not to laugh. After all of this, he's done in by his own overconfidence. Typical. I stumble forward, blindly groping in my equipment pouch for a number of smooth wooden rods. I approach the two Uchihas, sparking the seals on the dango skewers with the last of my useable chakra. I stab them into Madara's back, and fumblingly tackle Itachi to the ground.

"What - "

_...BOOM!_

The explosions cover the two of us with a thick mixture of blood and bits of flesh, all that is left of Uchiha Madara's chest. Wiping the blood out of my eyes, I grab another kunai and stagger over to the body to ensure the bastard's really dead.

****"Oh, come on. I don't know who this is, but it's definitely not Uchiha Madara!"

* * *

A/N: For those of you itching to correct us, yes, we know who Tobi is. We also know who Madara is, and guess which who we mean when we say "Uchiha Madara".

On a side note, this is going to be the last battle for at least a chapter or two. Naruto does need to start growing up _eventually. _

Tell us what you think!


	24. Doctor's Orders? Bah!

The man lying in front of me was an Uchiha, alright, but the age, height, and facial features are all wrong.

"That...that is my cousin, Washi. He should be on a mission near the Land of Rain right now. What is this? What is going on!" Itachi's gotten up as well, and he just seen the body.

Huh. I guess the False Body technique isn't as well known in the past as it will be in about twenty years. Not that it really matters - Madara was never hear to begin with, and I just showed my entire hand. This is really not good. Even worse, from what I remember, the body double has less than a third of the strength of the original, meaning that the real Madara is so far above me that if we ever cross paths, I might as well just kill myself and save us all some time.

Itachi stumbles and I reach up to stabilize him, not realizing that trying to catch someone who's almost two feet taller and at least sixty pounds heavier is not going to end well, especially when you're both injured.

* * *

You know, I'm really getting sick of hospitals, pun intended. I have to wonder what a doctor thinks when they see my medical file - how many pediatricians specialize in six year old ninja's who end up knocking on death's door so often that they might as well sit down for a spot of tea together.

I'm wrapped in enough bandages to cover a hundred wounds, but considering the state of my skin the last I saw it, this might even be an underreaction. I lift my arm to scratch an itch on my nose, and freeze as a sharp blinding pain shoots up my arm.

Right - guess I'm not going to be moving for a while.

* * *

Sarutobi Hiruzen was angry. Scratch that, he was absolutely furious; in fact, he was enraged to the point where his speech was polite enough to flay the skin of his subordinates, and his face was like a mask of stone. His eyes told a different story - if it was possible for someone to actually have flaming eyes, this would be it.

As a quick note, the build up of restrained chakra he had going for him actually was lighting up his eyes, but no one was brave enough to say that to his face.

Three days ago, he had received word via messenger pigeon that his village had been attacked, with casualties climbing into the high double digits. That such sensitive information had been entrusted to a delivery method as unreliable as carrier pigeon told him more about the situation than did the actual missive itself.

He made hasty excuses to the newly instated Mizukage, Terumi Ringo, and made his way to his home as fast as he could. As he stormed up the central road leading to the Hokage's Tower, he was absently aware of several ninja and other assorted civilians diving out of his way. He burst into his office and physically threw out the ANBU standing guard over the three elderly ninja in the room before he pulsed his chakra into the ancient desk that dominated the center of the room and activated the array of privacy seals that his predecessor had created. His chakra was raging to the point that even this minor application left scorch marks marring the smooth wooden surface; his guests blanched, suddenly wary of the man in front of them. Even in the midst of war, the Professor never lost his iron control - attack his village or those he watched over, and out came the angry youth who earned himself one of the most feared titles in the ninja world over the broken bodies of his enemies.

This wasn't like the play fight he had with the rampaging Sanbi jinchuuriki; this was the cold blooded killer known as the God of Ninja.

"What. Happened." His voice was less of a growl, and more of a deep roar. His former teammates flinched and stepped backwards, personally familiar with what he was capable of when he was in a mood like this, but Shimura Danzo stood his ground. Not out of fearlessness, but out of practicality - if the Hokage wanted him dead, a few feet one way or another wouldn't do him any good.

Smoothly, he launched into the explanation he had been preparing ever since the fires around the remnants of the Uchiha complex were contained. "As you know, tensions with the Uchiha clan have been -"

Slam!

"I am only going to ask once. Who did this?"

At this, Danzo did flinch slightly, before schooling his features - what was visible of them, anyways - back into calm. "We don't actually know - the body was that of chunin Uchiha Washi, who was on a delivery mission near the Land of Rain. Jonin Itachi is quite clear on the point that the man he and genin Uzumaki fought was someone entirely different. Most likely, it was some sort of body double technique, but I have never heard of anything quite so sophisticated before."

Sarutobi eased into his high backed chair, grateful that the solid desk in front of him hid his trembling hands from his audience. He really was getting too old for this kind of activity - such an icy rage was a younger man's arena. "There are a number of ways to use another's living body as a puppet, but you are right, this is rather different from anything I have heard of before. I will need to examine the body myself. More importantly, I need the damage reports from the attack."

Seeing the immediate danger had passed, or at least somewhat abated, Homura stepped forward and extended a thick folder. "All the pertinent details are in here - it's not very pretty though."

The Hokage reached over his desk and grasped the file, sliding it into the upper right drawer of his desk. "I will look at the details later. For now, a simple summary will do."

"Of course." Here, Homura paused for a moment and straightened his glasses before running his hand through his beard. "In terms of property, the damage was horrendous. Much of the upper levels of the Uchiha complex is nothing more than ash. Outside of a few buildings that were protected, those black flames burnt through everything; wood, stone, steel, bone."

Sarutobi nodded, familiar with the darker side of the Uchiha clan. "Amaterasu...which means the attacker had the Mangekyo. To the best of my knowledge, however, those flames burn for seven days and nights, until they burn themselves out of existence."

Danzo spoke up again, clutching his cane in a white knuckled grip. "Indeed, if were not for the intervention of Jonin Itachi using his own Mangekyo, there would be much less of the village standing. It is interesting, however, that he had conveniently awoken that power right when he needed it."

"Any and all investigations into this matter are to be led by myself, personally." The Hokage cuts Danzo off, turning back to Homura with a parting shot directed at his old rival. "Your little private security force is to stay out of this, or I will be forced to treat the infection in the great tree's roots."

Clearing his throat, his male teammate continued with his report. "Compared the to physical destruction, the overall loss of life was surprisingly light. While a majority of the combat capable ninja who were in the village were killed, the civilians were sheltering with the pregnant, children, elderly, and otherwise incapacitated clan members in underground safe houses, most of which were spared the fires."

Danzo cuts in again. "Curious, that they had private safe houses in their own village - it brings to mind certain theories that were hotly contested."

The Hokage glares and Danzo, who shuts his mouth and steps back. His job, however, has been done - the seed of doubt had been planted, and there was little anyone could do to get rid of it.

"Homura, you are in charge of the reconstruction efforts. Make sure that everyone that needs help is given all we can. We do not abandon our own. Furthermore, call in all Uchiha who are out on missions and take a headcount of those unaccounted for amongst the dead or the living."

"Yes, sir."

As the three turned and filed out the door, Hiruzen reached over to the seal array on the desk and removed the privacy barriers. He refrained from sighing, cognizant of the fact that he was being watched, and needed to be an example for his ninja, so instead he reached into a pocket of his robe and removed his pipe. He was just about to light the bowl when a stray line someone had said finally registered with him, causing him to inhale sharply and cough violently.

"_Naruto_ was involved in this?"

* * *

The next time I wake up, there's a distinctive smell of pipe smoke coming from nearby. Without opening my eyes, I smile, relaxing as childhood memories resurfaced. I had spent long hours in the Hokage's office as a kid, breathing in the same distinctive brand of tobacco.

"Hey, old man, you know that smoking will kill you, right?"

He snorts. "There's a huge list of things that could kill me out there - I really don't think smoking's going to be the reason I kick the bucket. Hell, if that's how I do end up going, I'll be pretty happy, all things considered."

"Always the optimist, huh?" Well, when it matters, anyways.

He reaches over and ruffles my hair playfully. Even though I'm technically twice his age, there's still something in me that reacts as a child, and I laugh and turn my head away.

"So, I hear you've been pretty busy recently." He leans back and looks at me, his brown eyes set in a piercing stare that cuts through the average ninja like a knife. He raises and eyebrow when I don't react as he expects, and I'm very thankful for my decision to invest a point in stone cold.

I decide to yank his chain a little, just for old time's sake. "Well, while you've been off on a nice vacation in Mist, some of us were working over here."

Hack...cough.

"Working? You brat, I've gotten reports from pretty much every branch of the village of a blond haired devil stirring up trouble in all manners of ways. Switching sugar with salt, setting trip wires and dud explosive tags, spray painting fairies on the ANBU equipment lockers - the list goes on." He steeples his fingers and looks down at me. "Well? What do you have to say for yourself."

"Er...wow, those Yamanaka sure get around, don't they."

"Yamana - alright, you've had your fun. I have to say though, a good portion of my ninja are more paranoid than I've seen them in quite some time." He leans back in his chair and removes his hat, holding it in his lap and meeting my eyes. "So. Talk to me."

I've had plenty of time to work over what I'm going to reveal when the inevitable questioning rolled around, so I'm able to answer his question without taking too much time. "After I got back from the mission to Water, I noticed that Itachi was somewhat distant. On the day of the incident, I had approached the Uchiha compound to speak with him, but something about the place creeped me out, so I went back for a few supplies I had at my house, just in case."

I take a breath, and continue. "When I got back to the compound, there was a massive ring of black flames surrounding the place, and I heard screaming coming from inside. I'd been working on the book of seals the Ringo gave me, and I happened to have a fire binding seal on me, which I used to create a hole in the fires."

At this point, there are two paths that I can take. Either I tell the Hokage the truth and open myself up to a lot more questions, or I can try to figure out a way to spin a story in such a way that it passes muster. I open my mouth to speak, and a feeling akin to a genjutsu sweeps over me. "When I ran in, I saw Itachi grappling with an unknown man, and taking the opportunity, I slapped an exploding tag on the man's back and tackled itachi out of the way. I hit the ground and rolled through a patch of the flames, and that's the last thing I remember."

The compulsion leaves me, draining away like water. I have no idea what the hell that was, but my story seems to have satisfied the Hokage.

"Hmm. That matches what Itachi has told us about that night." He leans over and grabs a clipboard hanging on a wall, flipping some pages and scanning the information. "Well, your doctors seem to think that you'll need almost six months to fully recover. That's three months in bed, and then weeks of rehabilitation."

I snort, and he chuckles. "Oh, I'll be surprised if you're not out in a month, and back to your usual tricks in two." He puts my medical chart back on the hook and stands up, moving over to a small sink in the corner of the room and tapping out the ashes in his pipe. "I don't expect you to sit in bed all day, but please try not to leave the hospital...especially the way you did back in Kirigakure.

"Oh, shut up."

He puts his hat back on and steps out of the room, sliding the door shut behind him. The moment he walks out, thick black wods pop up in the air in front of me.

**COMPLETED: CHALLENGE: HE WHO WALKS IN FIRE**

**REWARDS:**

**- SAVE CRYSTAL (1)**

**- 600 EXP**

**UNLOCKED:**

**- BLOODLINE THEFT**

**- NEW TRAIT**

**LEVEL UP?**

**- YES**

**- NO**

Bloodline theft? That sounds...rather interesting, actually. I guess most people would see it as abhorrent, but as a ninja, there are something I can't afford to turn my nose up. Still, it's not like I'm going to go around kidnapping people or robbing graves, but if the opportunity comes around, I'll definitely take it.

"**Yes**."

**UZUMAKI NARUTO - GENIN, LVL 30 (RANK CAP)**

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 76 (+18)**

**CONSTITUTION - 100 (+25)**

**DEXTERITY - 55 (+10)**

**INTELLIGENCE - 70 (+15)**

**WISDOM - 92 (+20)**

**CHARISMA - 140 (+30)**

**SPEED - 46 (+8)**

**CHAKRA: 1664**

**CHAKRA CONTROL: *X2**

**SKILL POINTS: 5**

**CLASS POINTS: 1**

**PERKS: 1**

**TRAITS: 1**

There's a level cap? What, do I have to be a chunin or something to gain an more exp? Damn, the next chunin exam is in three weeks, if I remember the date correctly, and it's in Suna. There's no way I'm going to be ready in time. Whatever, I'll figure this out later. For now, I'm going to put all of the skill points in to **chain the beast**, which brings me up to five useable tails. In theory, anyways. In actual usage, I'd burn myself to a crisp trying to channel that much power, so I'm probably still limited to three tails at the most, and that'll probably bring me right back to the hospital.

"Alright, let's see what I have left in **class**."

**CLASS: HEAVY ASSAULT: SIEGE (II):**

**SUPPLY CHAIN (0/3): INCREASED CHAKRA REGENERATION.**

**VICTUS HONOR (0/5): GAIN A ONE IN TWENTY CHANCE OF AVOIDING A FATAL ATTACK.**

**JUGGERNAUT (0/4): GAIN THE ABILITY TO SEAL USER'S CHAKRA IN RETURN FOR 2X PHYSICAL STATS, ONLY USEABLE ONCE PER DAY.**

Well, looks like I got an upgrade. All three choices look quite nice, but there's one that's going to come in handy over the next few years.

"**Supply chain**." My biggest advantage is my mind and massive chakra reserves, so picking up a skill that gives me the ability to use more draining techniques is pretty useful. Now, time to take a look at the new things.

"**Perks**."

**PERKS (I):**

**SILVERTOUNGE (0/3): ONCE A DAY, DOUBLE EFFECTIVE CHARISMA FOR AN HOUR.**

**SNAKE EYES (0/1): KILLING INTENT WILL FREEZE LOWER LEVEL NINJA. REQUIRES DIRECT EYE CONTACT.**

**LUCK OF THE DRAW (0/1): HIGHER ODDS OF SUCCESS IN MATTERS OF PURE CHANCE.**

Oh man, there's no question about this one. I owe a lot to my luck, and it never hurts to get luckier.

"**Luck of the draw**. **Traits**."

**AVAILABLE TRAITS:**

**HE WHO WALKS IN FIRE (0/10): GAIN A POTENTIAL AFFINITY FOR FIRE NATURED CHAKRA.**

So, I get trait points by leveling, but only unlock the actual traits themselves by fulfilling certain requirements, which I'm assuming here was to kill the fake Madara.

"**He who walks in fire**."

Right, well, that takes care of all the important stuff. I think I'm gonna take a little nap now...

* * *

A/N: Aaand, here's the next chapter. We know it's a bit short, but it's basically the end of this little mini arc. Here's some great news as well - in the next chapter, he'll no longer be six years old. He'll be seven!

God, we have a long way to go before we even hit his canon age. If you can still recognize a canon plot line then, we're not doing our jobs right.

Hope you guys (and girls) liked the chapter.


	25. Thirteen Sure Ain't a Lucky Number

It takes around two weeks for all of my skin to grow back, but it's time well spent. Something in the battle against Madara had changed Itachi's attitude towards me, and he is much more open now, much more willing to teach me. I'll admit, it was a bit of a surprise when he walked in to the hospital one day and told me that he was the one who planted the compulsion in me, but not because he was the one who did it. I'd figured that out awhile ago. No, the surprise came when I asked how exactly he managed to do that, since that wasn't exactly one of his skills that I knew about. His response scared me - a lot.

A 'gift' from a dead friend, huh. Well, there's only one person who fits that bill, and if Uchiha Itachi is running around with Shisui's eyes, the timeline that I know of has probably been blasted to pieces. I shudder. Itachi with the ability to compel people to do his bidding, on top of his already ridiculous skill level - not exactly a pleasant thought, no matter how much his loyalty has been proven.

Anyways, I've finally been cleared to get out of the hospital, and on the day of my birthday, to boot. What a nice gift.

I walk down the street towards my house, thankful that chakra drastically slows down muscle degradation, otherwise I'd be stuck with a whole lot more physical therapy than the light exercises I have to do nightly. I reach my mostly abandoned apartment building and climb the rickety outside stairs to the fourth floor, where my small three room home is. Four, really, if you count the hallway. I slide my key into the lock, noting the buildup of dust around the keyhole, and get the thing to turn after a few stubborn resistances.

To be brutally honest, my little sanctuary is pretty rundown. On the other hand, the vast majority of my youth has been spent in the confines of these walls - walls that have seen me at my worst, crying my heart out, and have witnessed my happiest moments, like the small parties the Old Man would throw for my birthday. Really, he's done a lot for me - hell, hes the one who taught me how to read and write. When I was younger though, I remember feeling resentful for all the times he wasn't there for me. Now? Now, I'm amazed he found any time for me at all. It's not like he had a job as the de facto ruler of a city full of superpowered killers for hire.

I meander through the place, turning on all the faucets to let the stagnant water run out, and checking for any dead appliances. Most of stuff happens to be from second hand sales, and they aren't exactly very reliable on a good day.

I come back to the single table in the kitchen, pulling out a rickety wooden chair and plop down, taking stock of what I need to fix. There's a blown bulb in my bedroom lamp, and the water heater seems to have broken down - again. With a sigh, I pull out a dented saucepan and turn up the gas for the stove, pouring in a cup of water. I guess it'll be a small snack here and then off to Ichiraku's for dinner.

A knock at the door jerks me away from my thoughts, and I shoot out of my chair, slipping my hand down to get a kunai from a pouch that...wasn't there. Right - the hospital has a no weapons policy. I cast about for a suitable weapon, then stealthily creep over to my front door. Holding my improvised weapon behind me, I reach out to the handle and turn it slowly, ready to spring into action at the first sign of trouble.

"Naruto...why are you holding a vegetable peeler behind your back?"

Okay, this is definitely not what I was expecting. Itachi is standing in front of me, holding up a plastic shopping bag. "Uhh, I was about to make some dinner, actually."

He cocks an eyebrow and sweeps right past me into my apartment. "Really? Surprising, I was under the impression that outside of instant ramen, there is no actual food in your house." The smug bastard - I swear he's smirking behind that emotionless face of his - walks to my kitchen and starts setting up, taking rice, carrots, broccoli, a bag of peas, and a wrapped fish from his bag, along with a pair of well maintained knives and a small box, which he sets to the side.

"You - what exactly are you doing?" I stand in the opening to my kitchen, gawking like an idiot as Itachi ties his long hair into a messy ponytail and rolls up his sleeve. "Do you really have nothing better to do than invade my space and start cooking! What about your clan?"

He glances at me coolly, then returns his attention to his preparations. After a moment, he speaks in his usual monotone. "My mother survived that night, while my father perished. As such, she is now the leader of the clan, and business such as after looking after those who need assistance falls to her. You, however, are my responsibility." With that, he resumes chopping the carrots into thin strips, knife flashing up and down in a manner more suited to a battlefield. Quick and deliberate, without a single wasted movement.

Seriously, it's like he treats killing people with the same level of attention as making dinner.

Another knock at the door brings me whirling around, but Itachi calmly ignores the sound and keeps right on with what he's doing. I stalk over to answer, grumbling under my breath about the sudden rash of unannounced visitors. I fling open the door and my words catch in my throat.

"Well, Naruto, if you don't want me here, I can certainly come back another time." The Hokage is looking down at me with a twinkle in his eyes, and I throw my hands up before dragging him in and slamming the bolt on the door.

"Should I be waiting for any more unexpected guests?" I ask archly.

He chuckles and covers my head with his hat. "No, I think I'm the last one." With a shake of his head, he leads me back to my kitchen. "Mm, smells like Itachi is making something nice."

Huh, he's right, that does smell pretty good. Wait - I only have have one...

I sprint past the Old Man, yelling as I go.

"I get the chair!"

* * *

After the meal, which was better than I expected it to be, the Hokage leans back against a wall from his seat on the floor and pulls out his ever present pipe. With a snap of his fingers, a small flame lights the contents of his bowl and he puffs away contentedly.

"Well, Naruto, happy birthday. How does it feel to be seven years old?"

I snort. "The same way it felt to be six. Also, would you mind putting out that pipe? Some of us here don't want to pick up lung cancer young."

With a shrug, he spikes his chakra slightly, and the aromatic smoke swirls in a tight spiral before forming the Konoha leaf. With another spike, the end of the smoke trail drifts out the kitchen and out into the hallway.

Bah. Show off.

He reaches into his robes and pulls out a well worn leather bound notebook, brown with age but still in good shape. "I heard about your little foray into the world of seals - I thought you might enjoy this."

I accept the book and flip through the pages, noting the untidy childish scrawl. It's a journal of some kind, one that dealt with the writer's first attempts at sealing. It's interesting to note that most of the entries ended with "it exploded", but the author's skill level has clearly improved by the end. I look up at the Old Man, waiting for an explanation.

"Ah, the writer of that book isn't able to give it to you in person, but it's something from their childhood, and they wanted you to have it." He winks. "Try to learn a little from their mistakes."

Ah - the handwriting is familiar, but I can't place it, only that I've seen something very similar before. "Thanks Old Man - I'll try not to blow anything important up."

He lets out a short bark of laughter before stiffly getting to his feet and taking his hat back. "Well, that's it for me; us old folk have an earlier bedtime." With that, he walks out of the apartment, taking the built up smoke with him.

Itachi stands as well, but he moves over to the counter where his left his box. He places it on the table in front of me, and gestures for me to open it. I slide of the polished wooden lid, which proceeds to fall from suddenly nerveless fingers. Without another word, Itachi nods and walks out, carefully closing the door behind him.

Inside the box are what are generally considered to be the four cornerstones of the sealing arts - a professional quality inkstone and ink stick, several fine brushes, and sheets of a soft rice paper.

A slow grin builds on my face as I realize the full extent of the twin gifts. Oh yes, I'll be ready the next time I run into any problems. Afterall, there's no kill like overkill.

* * *

**FIVE MONTHS LATER.**

Yes, I know the date. Seriously, I don't get why some of these messages pop up, but I've gotten used to them by now.

I hop up from where I was lying on the ground, and stretch my tired muscles a bit. I've been spending the last few days sparring against sets of water clones, trying to maximize my combat potential while dealing with the fact that I've hit a limit in terms of my stats. The worst part of this is my abysmal speed, which opens me up for abuse from pretty much every other genin out there, especially the ones who are going to be appearing at the next chuunin exams, held in one month in Kiri.

It'll be interesting to see what kind of competition I'll be up against, but I'm pretty sure that there won't really be any kind of threats worth speaking of. None of the jinchuuriki should be there, and barring some kind of planted chunin or jonin, I'm going to sweep this thing.

I even have a team set up as well. In the last exam, the one that took place in Suna, there was a team that had only one member graduate, leaving a spot that needs to be filled in order for the team to try for promotion again. At least, promotion under Konoha's rules. Other countries have their own regulations for promotion, but Konoha has only two ways to be promoted - either competing in the chunin exams with a three man team, or securing a battlefield promotion in the midst of a war.

Since there's no convenient war for me to participate in, the exams are my only way around that pesky level cap, which is seriously limiting my ability to compete in the big leagues. I haven't met my team yet, but I've been informed that I'll be filling in the role of the heavy hitter - the team has a genjutsu specialist and a Hyuuga information specialist. It's a good, well rounded team, so there shouldn't be any problems with the first stages of the test. It individual stages should also be a breeze, but just in case, I've prepared some surprises.

After Itachi's gift of sealing supplies and the journal from the Hokage - which, while full rather amusing mistakes, did "teach" me several "new" seals - I was able to finally make some permanent upgrades to my equipment. The most prevalent are the structural integrity arrays I placed on practically everything I own - from my socks to my kunai, it'll take quite a bit to tear up my stuff. There are also a number of pockets in my jumpsuit that are a lot larger than they look - I can fit half my body weight in one of them, without any kind of sign on the outside. There are a number of other little tricks I have, but if I need to really use all of them, - well, let's just say that I highly doubt a simple chunin exam is going to push me that far.

* * *

"For the upcoming chunin exams, the following teams will be participating. Team four, under the command of jonin..."

Blah, Blah, Blah. None of this really all that important, since only a handful of these guys looks like what they have to make chunin, and that's only if they get lucky. The rather indistinguishable jonin continues to read from the scroll in his hand, and his voice drones on, slowly putting me to sleep.

"...due to an injury that removes a member of this team from the active duty roster for at least a month, the makeup of team thirteen, under the command of jonin Mitsuburo Akane, is now Yuuhi Kurenai, Yakushi Kabuto, and Uzumaki Naruto. Finally, team eighteen, under..."

Wait, what? Okay, I know for a fact that Kabuto isn't Kurenai's teammate, and he has a team of his own, so how the hell did he end up with us?

Speak of the devil, here's the silver haired medic in the flesh. I stride towards him, cutting through - or rather, under - the crowd of genin. There are times when I don't really enjoy being short, but it does have its advantages. We draw close and I pull him aside, whispering furiously with a smile on my face.

"What the hell are you doing?" Sure, our relationship had gotten significantly stronger over the past months, but this came completely out of the blue.

He smiled and rested a hand on my shoulder, acting like a concerned senior looking after his junior. "Ah, well, I heard from a friend that you were going to be part of this team, but then it turned out that the other member of this team wasn't quite ready to take the exam. So, after some discussion with my own team, they decided that they would wait till the next exam, and I was placed as your teammate instead."

Right. So, to translate: the other teammate apparently wasn't good enough, so he somehow incapacitates both that ninja and his own team, freeing up a slot for him to become my teammate.

When I said his loyalty was a little overwhelming, I may have made an understatement.

"Fine - please tell me none of the injuries are permanent."

He smiles even wider. "Why, I would never harm fellow Konoha ninjas! We had a very pleasant conversation, but they may have still been distracted by some points I raised, leading to training accidents. It's a very unfortunate set of circumstances, but there's always a silver lining."

It's hard to believe that he can say that with a straight face, but I guess everyone's got something they're good at.

"Excuse me, are you two Uzumaki and Yakushi?" It's a polite voice, rather cultured in fact, and it belongs to a black haired, red eyed teenager. Looks like Kurenai is still beautiful, even when she's younger.

I grin and rub the back of my head. "Yup! Just call me Naruto - no need to be formal." I elbow Kabuto, who extends his hand and delicately holds Kurenai's fingers. He bows, almost kissing her hand but not quite.

"It's a pleasure to meet you." His voice is charming, smooth, and to me, utterly fake. Oh well, at least he's trying.

Her cheeks are dusted with a faint shade of pink, but her voice and bearing remain steady. "Though our meeting could certainly have been under better circumstances, I hope that we will work well together."

Polite, yet firm, trying to set up a feeling of camaraderie amongst her new teammate. Yes, if her physical skills back up those of her mind, she should easily become a chunin. "I agree. In fact, as you have the most experience of us all, and this is your team, not ours, why don't you lead us?" Not quite true, as both Kabuto and I have at least twice the experience she does, but it's not like she has access to restricted files, or the memories in my head.

Kabuto glances sharply at me, but apparently whatever he sees is enough to convince him to follow along. "Yes, it behooves our leader to have a keen mind, such as that of a budding genjutsu prodigy."

Now she's really starting to blush, and while the conversation is somewhat disturbing, given that I don't know what Kabuto's goal is here, I have to admit that watching the future ice queen of Konoha act like a spring flower is very amusing.

On the other hand, if she's going to act as our leader, she has to have some confidence left. "Hey, why don't we practice together a little? That way we can get to know each other."

She bends down slightly and smiles at me warmly. "Of course we can. Do you have any ideas in mind?"

Now, normally, I'd be rather irritated by the patronization, unintended as it may be. Unfortunately, just as my mentor and his before, I have a slight weak spot for the fairer sex. Just a slight one - I'm not a raging pervert like some. Not naming anyone here, but unlike the man who started me on this whole path, I do respect women - and hey, a little honest admiration never hurt anybody.

But, there are ways to subtly get revenge. "Hey, I know this team that would be willing to spar with us. They're all chunin, so we can also get advice on what we need to watch out for." I can almost see the two of them mulling the idea over in their heads - Kabuto knows I'm up to something, but he seems to be willing to see what it is, and Kurenai obviously doesn't suspect the cheerful blond kid to be capable of duplicity.

"Sure. Lead the way!"

Hook, line, and sinker.

* * *

"Get back here you damn brat!"

On second thought, this might not have been my best idea. It was the work of minutes to find Hana and her team, and a few more seconds to rile her up enough for a running battle to begin. Kotetsu was half-heartedly running after Kabuto, who was acting terrified but still managing to stay one step ahead the whole time. Kurenai had tied Izumo up in some kind of genjutsu, and while neither of them were hurt, they were both out of the battle, since Izumo was only restrained for as long as Kurenai was focused of the illusion.

Hana and her three dogs, however, were gunning for me from the start. I really couldn't say why; outside of a few simple pranks, like letting loose a skunk in the kennels, I've never done anything to her.

That aside, she's really trying to kill me.

_Whrrrnnng...scrrrtch._

One of the dogs spins by, grinding up the soil of the training ground as he shoots past me. I flip over the horizontal cyclone and land in the trees, dodging yet another pass of the triple drills.

She's a hell of a lot better than Kiba will be at her age, and those dogs are pinning me in neatly. I grin wildly - it's time to play.

* * *

Inuzuka Hana was currently chasing after the bane of her existence, or at least her nose. Almost like clockwork, she could expect a weekly attack from that blond chewtoy that resulted in both humiliation and olfactory pain. One day would see a skunk set loose on them, and the next, he would tag her dogs with a fluorescent pink spray that smelled like liquid fire and took forever to wash out. She'd never even heard of some of the things he used; it was like he made them himself.

This time, though, he made a huge mistake. He taunted her with his team, but her teammates had handled them nicely. Now, it was just him, her, and her three very vicious attack dogs.

The triplets had him forced into a particular section of the woods, each dog driving at him from a different axis until he was right where she wanted him. With a fierce cry, she lept from the top of the tree she was perched on and brought the reverse end of a kunai down on the back of his skull.

_Shink._

Her arms bulging with effort, she tried to force the blade down, as it was currently caught in the links of a fine, textured chain. The kid had looped the metal around his arms several times before spreading them apart, creating a sort of barrier. Her knife was stuck in the mess, as was the hand wielding it.

She lashed out with her free hand, only to find the kid dissolving into water, chain falling to the ground. A thin strand of wire attached to the end of the metal pulled it through the air and into the hands of another blond child. For the first time, Hana saw the true form of the weapon - it was a length of chain around twelve feet long, with spherical weights hanging at each end. A meteor hammer? Why would this kid have one, much less know how to use one? It became a moot point as he expertly twirled the twin orbs around his head, occasionally letting on of the ends fly out and strike the air.

It was an impressive display, and one that definitely proved his point - everything within the range of one of those weights was his territory, and entering would net the attacker a painful meeting with a solid steel ball moving fast enough to be a blur.

Hana cursed under her breath and leapt back into cover to regroup and plan again.

* * *

The meteor hammer is a weapon that takes a good deal of time to master, as the slightest mistake can send pounds of metal hurtling towards the wielder. I happen to be an expert with this particular weapon, however, and had made some further modifications as well. You definitely did not want to get hit with this.

Hana was doing a decent job for her skill level, but it isn't anything impressive. I might as well end this now and get back to my team, but -

_ROOAAAR! Crash...stomp...smash._

Loud noises in a forest followed by the sound of trees falling and heavy footsteps? Never a good sign. I jump into the canopy and scan the area, stiffening as I see what's causing the ruckus. Hana was back, and her current strategy is pretty obvious. Then again, it's kinda hard to miss a giant three headed dog coming your way, with a girl shouting obscenities your way from atop its head.

Maybe she's a little better than I thought.

The meteor hammer in my hands was a custom made weapon, and it, along with a number of other toys, took the majority of my funds to have created. They were made of good quality metal, nothing too special, but they could stand up to a lot more seal work than the cheap materials I was forced to use in my last fight.

Holding one of the weights in my hand, I twirl the other end around my head in a circle whose radius keeps increasing. By the time the chain has extended to nearly twenty feet, the three headed wolf transformation was coming my way, fast. As it enters my attack zone, I suddenly allow seals on the ends of the chain to release, expanding it out to it's full length of over one hundred feet. The momentum of the spin carries it around the beast's neck and back to my hand, where I grab the other weight and leap to the ground.

Checkmate.

I flood the seals along the length of the metal with chakra, watching with glee as the hundreds of seals along the length of the chain activate, spitting out more links that wrapped around everything nearby in an explosion of crackling lightning. When the lightshow ends, the giant cerberus is firmly bound, as is it's rider. I grin and hold up the peace sign - Inuzuka, 0; Uzumaki, too many to count.

When I get back to the rest of my team, I find a smiling Kabuto standing over an exhausted Kotetsu, along with Kurenai holding the flat of a kunai to Izumo's throat. All four look up as my footsteps come closer, and outside of Kabuto, I can almost literally see their jaws dropping as they see me drag the trussed up forms of Hana and her three ninja dogs behind me.

****Ah, it's a good day to be alive.

* * *

A/N: Well, here's the next chapter. I'm not the greatest fan of this one, but my partner and I did try to make the interactions seem somewhat realistic (considering the character's backgrounds, anyways). The ending is a bit iffy as well, but the next chapter should be better, with a kickoff of the new arc.

Still, bet you didn't see this coming.

Tell us what you thought of the chapter!


	26. I'm Baaack!

Yuuhi Kurenai wasn't quite sure what to make of her new teammates. The whole situation was a little bit off, actually. First, Anko was promoted to chunin, and while she's somewhat annoying, Kurenai was happy for her teammate, especially considering what Anko's past was like. Then, after being assigned a new member for the exams, Ahiko is badly injured in a training accident. The Hyuga wasn't one to get very physical, so the explanation that he'd somehow mangled the muscles in both legs was a little fishy. His replacement was even odder.

The boy just seemed so weird - he was polite to a fault, never made a rude comment, and was very charming. She blushed, then fought it down. A little too charming, maybe. The kid was the one who bothered her the most, however. From what she understood, he was a seven year old prodigy who had the eye of the Hokage - that was enough to explain away some of his maturity and advanced skills.

On the other hand, beating down Inuzuka Hana and her three canine companions was a far cry from just advanced skills. Though there were some whispers of the Inuzuka giving up the role of clan heiress in favor of the medical fields, there was no doubt that she was strong. She had, after all, decisively won the tournament portion of her chunin exam, and had received extensive training from her mother. Watching a slip of a boy half her size drag her back in chains was -

Well, she wasn't sure what it was, but it certainly wasn't normal.

* * *

"Do you have your kunai?"

"Yes, they're in this pocket right here."

"What about your shuriken, and camping supplies, and -"

That's it - this has gone on long enough. "I'm not exactly a child, Kabuto - I do know what I'm doing."

"Oh, but you are a child, Naruto, and as your elder, it is my duty to ensure that you are well prepared for the world out there." The bespectacled ninja has an infuriating smile on his face as he answers, and I really, really, want to smack him. He's changed quite a bit from the near emotionless wreck he was six months ago, and while I appreciate the loyalty he's shown me, he's still an irritating bastard.

"Let's just get this over with - I have better things to be doing than pandering to a bunch of wrinkly old geezers."

A large hand drops down on my shoulder, followed by the distinctive scent of pipe smoke. "You wouldn't happen to be including me in that statement now, would you?"

I twist my head backwards and look at the comically stern face of the Old Man. "Of course I am. You'd better just give me that hat before you end up with arthritis in your neck, you know."

"Hah! You little brat." He playfully ruffles my hair and I squirm out of his grip, cussing him out all the way.

As Kurenai and my temporary teacher arrive, I straighten and try to act professional, ignoring the antics of the overgrown child in front of me. Seriously, just because your subordinates can only see you back doesn't mean you should make funny faces at the only actual child in the area.

Kabuto is holding a straight face off to the side, but I swear I just saw the corners of his mouth twitch.

"Ah, sir, I wasn't expecting to see you here." Mitsuburo Akane isn't really much of a ninja, to be brutally honest. He was good enough to become a jonin, but there is nothing that stands out about him. Officially, he's known as one of those solid, dependable ninjas who had a well rounded skill set and few weaknesses, but I just call them cannon fodder. Really, anyone who doesn't specialize by the time they reach chunin is just asking for trouble. Unless, of course, you're like the Professor, in which case you simply choose to specialize in everything.

"I am simply bidding farewell to each of the genin teams as they set out. Your group is the last, correct?" The Hokage turns around and faces Mitsuburo, taking a draw on his pipe. "Yes, the paperwork that needed to be filled delayed your teams departure date by almost a full day. Hurry along now, there are only a few days left before the beginning of the exam." With that, he walks back to his office, disappearing with a flicker of leaves between one step and the next.

Show off.

* * *

Watching his new master had quickly become Kabuto's hobby. Well, Naruto would vehemently disagree as to that description of their relationship, but Kabuto couldn't care less. In the half a year since that fateful day when the blond dropped out of a tree in front of him and spoken words that struck his soul, Kabuto had been watching, adding up all of the inconsistencies around him.

Not for an eventual betrayal. No, Kabuto had chosen his true master of his own free will, and he would stick to his decision. It was just difficult to anticipate something so foreign to his experience.

At times, Naruto would behave as nothing more than he seemed; he was a seven year old bundle of energy, rude and poking his nose into everything around him. He was almost like an over eager puppy, one that just never learned its lesson.

But for every time Kabuto saw nothing but a child, there was an incident where the whiskered ninja acted like someone many times his age. Skills that should not have been known were used without a second thought, mental patterns rarely seen in ninja years older were solidly ingrained, and there were moments where Naruto's hands would twitch into a seal that did not correspond with any technique he ever used, as if it were something he had practiced for years but was no longer able to use.

Travelling with his makeshift team brought even more mysteries to light. Unlike the other three members of the team, Kabuto's cursory investigations had determined that the blond had no significant outdoors experience to speak of. The ease with which he went about setting up camp belied that conclusion, as it spoke of a long familiarity with the process. He wasn't the only one to have noticed; both Yuuhi and Mitsuburo were beginning to grow curious over his abilities.

"I am impressed, Naruto. You seem to have picked up my lessons in a very short time." Kabuto crouched down and smiled at his master, hoping he went along with it.

Naruto was about to make an angry retort when the situation caught up with him and he blinked rapidly. "Of course! You've been so helpful over the last few months in catching me up with things I need to know." Plastering a smile on his face, he turned to the other members of the team. "Kabuto ran into me in the hospital, and he's been teaching me a lot."

The white haired boy smiled - his master was much too insightful for his age, but that was by no means a bad thing.

* * *

Thank god for instant ramen. If I had to go for this long without a single bite of the delicious dish, I'd probably snap and make a break to the nearest town for my fix.

No, seriously, people have tried to break that addiction for over a century and a half, and no one's succeeded. I'm still not sure it even counts as an addiction in the first place - I can stop whenever I want to. I just don't want to, 'cause is simply tastes so good.

Getting back to the matter at hand, I watch the kettle held over the fire as the water inside came to a boil. Kurenai is out, busy with matters of personal hygiene, and the jonin, Mitsuburo, is doing a quick look around the perimeter of the camp. With us only half a day's travel from Kiri there shouldn't be any issues, but, considering the recent upheavals, it was decided better safe than sorry.

Kabuto's in one of the tents behind me, a tent that I shared with him. It's an odd circumstance for the both of us. I still have lingering doubts about him, and he just keeps watching me. Really, it's more than a bit unnerving.

Footsteps sound in the distance, and I pull the pot off the water and pour the steaming water into the plastic cup at my feet. Weighing down the cover with a handy kunai, I idly scratch a rudimentary seal into the bark of the fallen log I sit on. As the footsteps come closer, I tilt the kettle and let the rest of the water flow over the seal, which drank it like the desert sand.

"Now, Naruto, you know better than to ignore your surroundings. Remember, bad guys could come from anywhere."

Oh, how I wanted to jump up and impale the blasted man with a rusty kunai. Instead, I turned to him and smiled, showing all of my teeth. "Sorry, sir, I was just making sure my ramen was done right."

"Hmph. You know, it really isn't fair for you to keep things from your team, you know." He leans down and takes the ramen cup from my hands, patting me on the head as he did. "I'll take this one, and you can get another after I tell you some tips about basic observation techniques."

That does it. Any sympathy I have for this idiot vanishes like smoke - he deserves everything that's about to happen.

He nudges me off the log and takes a seat, preparing to eat my ramen - and really, I'm tempted to put a blade through his hand for even thinking about it - when the shoddy seal I created earlier suffers from catastrophic field collapse, releasing about a gallon of boiling water onto my new "teacher".

_Aaaiieeeee!_

* * *

The aftermath of my little stunt works out quite nicely. Slurping the last of the broth from my rescued ramen, I finish telling Kurenai what happened.

"...and then he must have been holding the cup badly, because he spilled it on his private area. Everyone knows that you shouldn't hold ramen badly."

She looks like she doesn't know whether to laugh or cry about the absurdity of my statement, and in the end she just sighs. "Great. First Anko gets promoted, then Ahiko goes and injures himself, and now Akane scorched his..."

She trails off after a glance in my direction and blushes. I take the opportunity to jump in the air and fistpump wildly. "Don't worry! We're going to win this whole thing. You can confuse them, Kabuto can run away and throw needles, and I'm just awesome!"

It speaks volumes about the quality of her teacher's training that she's distracted enough by my antics to not notice Kabuto slipping a presumably laced needle into Mitsuburo's thigh. He looks up and catches my eye, before nodding and removing the evidence of his work.

I seriously hope he got the message about the murder of allied ninja. It'd be a pain to explain how someone died after dumping hot water on their lap.

* * *

Kurenai was seriously considering turning around and going straight back home, chunin exam be damned. She and Kabuto had taken turns hauling their teacher's prostrate body to Kiri, where they checked him into the local hospital. He'd awoken for a short period, where the two of them had managed to get him to relinquish their permission forms before leaving him to whimper in misery.

She didn't exactly feel very sorry for him - he never had been a great teacher, and any jonin dumb enough to incapacitate themselves by spilling cup ramen really wasn't worth the rank.

Unfortunately, that left her to go through the exams with a team that consisted of an idiot blond that somehow captured Inuzuka Hana, and a half trained silver haired medic. Seriously, it was hard to tell if Kabuto's attempts to heal Akane's actually helped, or just made the injury worse.

With all the things they had to take care of, the team found themselves at the location of the first exam with barely a minute to spare.

"Damn it, we're going to be late!"

Naruto tapped Kurenai on the shoulder and got her attention. "Instead of running up all the flights of stairs to the fifth floor, why don't we just..."

* * *

_Crash!_

The gathered genin looked up in surprise when three bodies hurtled up the outside of the nondescript building they were waiting in, crashed through the windows, and came to a stop in the middle of the room.

"Aaand - safe!"

The little blond kid in the center was jumping around cheering about how they were on time, while another leaf ninja stood in the corner and fixed his glasses, giving the entire room a onceover. The last of the three was also standing, but she was cradling her face in her hands, little bits of red skin showing through.

Who the hell were these jokers?

* * *

Kurenai was trying to remember a time when she had been more embarrassed than she was now, and really couldn't. What on earth convinced her to listen to Naruto?

"Hey! You lot. Settle down!" Deep purple hair swirled around the head of the Kiri ninja who stepped into the room, forming a striking contrast against the green pinstriped overrobe she was wearing. Two sheathed swords hung from either side of her hips, almost long enough to scrape against the ground. Sharply filed teeth completed the image, teeth that were currently grinding as the owner looked at the shattered windows and three ninja from Konoha.

Kurenai saw the sharpened teeth and froze, knowing exactly what they represented. Only seven ninja in all of Kirigakure were allowed that badge of honor. Sharpening one's teeth was seen as a direct challenge to the existing Swordsmen, and was grounds for an immediate duel, with the victor retaining the title of Swordsman of the Mist.

Of the seven blades, each more famous than their individual wielders, only one was a paired set. The Twin Lightning Blades, Kiba, were said to be able to channel elemental lightning into attacks that struck faster than the eye could see.

Naruto's idea had just gotten a high ranked ninja very, very, angry.

"What the hell do - oh, it's you. What're you doing in a chunin exam?"

What? Who was the lady talking to. Kurenai looked up, and double checked to make sure she was seeing things right. The examiner was ignoring both herself and Kabuto, instead looking at the youngest of their team with a faint sense of familiarity?

"Eh, well, I really am just a genin, you know. But don't worry, I'm gonna blast through this thing." Naruto had finally stopped bouncing and was rubbing the back of his head while smiling like a loon.

The woman looked like someone had slapped her, and her mouth worked for a minute before she continued speaking. "No way - really? Gah, looks like I have to change my bet before word gets out."

She shook her head and gathered her thoughts, before motioning for all of the genin to follow her into the room she came from. As they filed through the door, Kurenai could tell where most of their thoughts were, since hers were in the same place.

How the hell did Naruto know one of the Seven Swordsmen?

* * *

The instructions for the exam were fairly simple, Kabuto thought. It was a three paged paper exam that covered the absolute basics of what a chunin level ninja had to know, and nothing else. There were no tricks, no hidden challenges, just a simple test of general knowledge.

How quaint.

Finishing the last question, Kabuto slipped the third sheet under the other two and began writing over his answers to the first questions, working slowly. As his hand copied over the words below, his eyes scanned the room, looking for those who had finished first.

There - a genin from Iwa was done, and looked confident in his answers. Coupled with his leaner frame, it suggested either a ninjutsu or genjutsu specialist. A flick down to the ninja's paper granted more information. The penmanship was too poor for a fuuinjutsu specialist, and the boy's hands didn't bear the marks of working with medical tools. There were, however, a number of faded burn marks on the tips of the fingers, and a distinct lack of any signs of facial hair in a region around the mouth, while a faint stubble was growing in elsewhere.

A Rock ninja with a specialty in fire natured ninjutsu, one who also had a reasonable grasp on his chakra, but was only recently introduced to his affinity. Taking him out with medically enhanced close combat would be pathetically easy.

Kabuto's eyes slid to the next ninja while his pencil continued to move across the page.

* * *

In an airy room on the seventh floor of a building, several Mist ninja were lounging around, waiting for the results of the examination going on below them. When the door opened, every head snapped towards the entrant.

Ameyuri walked over to an occupied armchair, plopping down as the former occupant scrambled to get out of her way.

"Well?"

No one was sure who asked, but the same question was on all of their tongues. She looked up and massaged her temples, before leaning her elbows on her knees and taking a breath.

"Konoha's brought in a ringer."

* * *

A/N: Well, the next chapter kicks off the real meat of the exams. It should be interesting, but it might take a while, graduation coming up and all.

Tell us what you think!


	27. The Road to Hell

Very few people were eliminated in the first test, but this did bring up one crucial point - it was possible to continue, even if you were not part of a traditionally three man team.

The second exam began immediately after the first, with the genin who passed the first test being brought to the opening of a cave. There was a new proctor this time, a ninja wrapped head to toe in thick cloth bandages. His voice was muffled and soft, so his audience had to lean in and listen carefully. Kurenai herself only managed to catch bits and pieces.

"...shrine in cave...opens with four...sacred...return to this spot."

As much as she tried, she couldn't make heads or tails of the instructions, and it seemed she wasn't the only one.

"Hey, what gives man! We didn't come all the way here to this backwards place just to -"

_Urk...thump._

A slender needle, almost a foot long and jet black, buried itself in the lower corner of the loudmouth's neck. With a slow stumble, the boy from Suna fell backwards and landed heavily.

"...fail..." A ninja wearing a Mist headband dropped out of the mist and grabbed the boy, disappearing with a flicker. No one else protested - the needle moved so fast that they couldn't even see the man throw it.

"...three days...begin..." With that, the faceless ninja vanished, leaving the stunned genin standing in front of a rather forbidding looking cave. Kurenai was frozen, unsure of what to do, but her team had no such compunctions. Kabuto was already walking into the cave, and Naruto grabbed her hand and pulled her after him.

"Come on, what're you waiting for!"

She knew this was going to end badly.

* * *

_Clunk._

"What was that?"

Naruto turned back to look at her. His eyes widened comically, and he held up a hand to stop her from moving.

"Wait wait wait! Don't take another step." He moved closer and squatted down in front of her, digging gently at the dirt below her feet.

"Oh damn, guess I was right." He stood up and scratched his head.

"What is it?" Kurenai was starting to panic now, and it showed. The last three hours had not been a walk in the park, as the single path from the beginning quickly branched out into a massive labyrinth, with hundreds of tunnels leading in all kinds of crazy directions. The absolute darkness did nothing to alleviate the tension, and it it wasn't for the handy little seal Kabuto pulled from somewhere, she would be freaking out a lot more. As it was, the seal barely produced enough light to see where they were going, an unfortunate result of Kabuto's need to conserve his average sized chakra reserves.

"Well, nothing much. Looks like you've stepped on a mine of some kind, but it shouldn't really be an issue." He turned and started to say something to the third member of their group, only to be cut off by Kurenai's irate screech.

"Not and issue! I'm standing on top of a mine, and I'd rather not die quite so young." Her eyes almost burning with rage, she would gladly have strangled the kid if it didn't mean stepping of the pressure plate and blowing herself up.

Huh. Maybe she could take her team with her, because she was starting to think it'd be worth it.

"What? Oh, getting you off is easy, but I was just curious to know whether this was an isolated trap or a sign of things to come." He shrugged, before snapping his fingers and turning back to her. "Right, I forgot. Let's just get you over here."

A copy of the boy appeared next to him, and the next thing Kurenai knew, she was standing next to a blond while the clone was resting on top of the plate.

"Right, so we'll just keep going, then this guy'll trigger the bomb." With that, the blond grabbed her hand again and dragged her down the tunnel, Kabuto following at a sedate rate.

_Boooooom!_

"Huh. Didn't think the blast would be quite that big. Oh well, I hope no one else was following us or anything."

Kurenai resisted the urge to sink into a ball and groan. She should have know that Anko leaving would mean that she would get even crazier teammates.

* * *

_Crunch...booom!_

_Swish...snick...boooom!_

_Crack...Thud._

"Wow. Whoever put up these traps had way too much time on their hands." Naruto idly walked down the dirt path, looking at the twisted remains of a plethora of what presumably used to be traps.

Kurenai and Kabuto followed him, the latter merely lighting the way while the former was already starting to inure herself to the sudden surprises her team pulled from nowhere.

She was definitely not twitching an eyebrow as the youngest member of the three mass produced clones and used them to clear all the paths ahead of them. Really. It's not like he was just burning more chakra in an hour than she produced in a day.

She wasn't annoyed at all.

She hopped over what looked like a broken bear trap, and tried to figure out some things about her team. "How exactly are you making so many clones without killing yourself?"

He stopped and looked back at her, quirking an eyebrow. "Well, reusing the water from the last set to make the new ones does reduce the cost, but really, I'm just awesome." With that, he turned back to watching his copies clear the tunnels, whistling tunelessly as he went.

You know what? Fine - her team is absolutely crazy. She sighed and followed after them - the only good thing here was that they'd be fighting other teams, not her.

* * *

There were an awful lot of traps littered across the cave, and while I just have my clones blindly trigger the majority, I take the opportunity to retrieve some for my own uses. As I stoop down to pick up a convoluted metal contraption and seal it away, I notice that the cave has fallen silent and my clones are still alive.

"Wow. I'm guessing this would be the shrine." The passageway we were in suddenly widens into a massive cavern that is lines with carvings of monstrous creatures. The rough stone of the cave floor gives way to a smooth black gloss that reflects the light from the seal like a dull mirror. In the center of the hall is a small pedestal, upon which rests a series of upright interlocking rings surrounding a crude stone basin.

"Alright, now what?" Kurenai whispers, but the sound is caught and bounced around the room until it sounds like she is shouting.

Wincing, the three of us step back into the cave, and the amplified sounds abruptly cut off. Kabuto fixes his glasses and places the seal tag I gave him back into his pouch. As the cave plunges into darkness, he takes us by the shoulders and pushes us back into the shrine room, where our eyes are assaulted by a sudden bright light, emanating from the standing rings. The purple glare throws shadows everywhere, and as we silently make our way to the center, our own shadows seem to writhe and twist behind us.

The pedestal has four slots sliced out of the base, each with a rough imprint of a hand inside. We share a glance, then I make a clone and direct it to the fourth spot. Kabuto holds up three fingers and Kurenai nods, each of us holding a hand above a slot. As his last finger drops, we firmly place our hands on the imprints, and there's a echoing click as the stone warms and glowing lines trace themselves upon the smooth surface.

The lines meet at the bowl on the top, and there's a slight pull on my chakra. The runes leading from my hand turn green, as do those stretching from Kabuto's and Kurenai's, but my clone has a pained expression on his face before he opens his mouth as if to scream and suddenly bursts into a spray of water.

"Shit! Everybody dow-"

The lines flash red and a pulse throws us all backwards, the sounds of our bodies striking the floor magnified over and over again. With a rumble, the plinth sinks into the ground and is replaced by a tablet covered in a script I've never seen before. Each lines of the flowing runes lights up one by one and the entire room begins to shake. Creating two clones, I have them grab my teammates and carry them back to the exit, only to find a solid slab blocking the archway. With no other option, the clones throw themselves over us and protect us from the falling chunks of rock.

When the shaking stops and the dust clears, the ceiling has fractured, a thin layer of carved stone having fallen down, revealing the entire room to be made of a single smooth black surface. There's a faint glow coming from everywhere, just enough to cast enough light to see dimly.

"What the hell was that?" Unlike before, Kurenai's voice doesn't echo, but instead sounds flat, as if it is being absorbed by our surroundings.

I open my mouth to answer, but freeze as a massive sealing array lights up beneath our feet. While I can't see the whole thing very well, there's enough for me to discern its purpose.

"It's a summoni-"

Before I can finish my sentence, a black orb shoots out of the ground and hovers above the tablet, growing larger by the second. There's a chime, and thick, blocky words appear in the air in front of me.

**BELIAL - DEMON LORD, LVL 5**

**STATS:**

**STRENGTH - 200**

**CONSTITUTION - 200**

**DEXTERITY - 20**

**INTELLIGENCE - 10**

**WISDOM - 10**

**CHARISMA - 10**

**SPEED - 100**

**CHAKRA: 20,000**

**CHAKRA CONTROL: *X5**

**GUARDIAN OF THE OTHERWORLD GATES, BARRIER BETWEEN THIS WORLD AND THE OUTER PLANES. UNDEFEATED FOR 3,657 YEARS.**

Alright, I want a refund on this game - since when did demons exist?

* * *

Once again, Kurenai wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. Actually, in this case, she had a sneaking suspicion that both would be quite acceptable.

The team's actions up to the activation of the pedestal had been by the book - all external chakra outputs ceased, operational silence was enforced, and as far as she could tell, the only thing that went wrong was trying to fill the fourth slot with a clone. The rest of the team's handprints had lit up in green, while the clone's was the only one to appear as that sickly red color.

Of course, the next few minutes quickly threw out any hopes of sticking to pre-taught maneuvers. To the best of her knowledge, there was nothing in Konoha's ninja handbook that spoke of the approved methods to deal with demons that were several stories tall.

Hell, Kurenai wasn't even aware that demons actually existed before this moment.

Her first thought, after the absolutely mind numbing sense of terror abated, was to dispel whatever genjutsu she was under. A few attempts quickly disabused her of that notion - either this was real, or someone had achieved the holy grail of illusory techniques. Since no one was even close to creating an illusion that was both undetectable and unbreakable, the truth, hard as it was to believe, lay with the monstrous creature in front of her being completely real.

The blue furred being was tall enough to scrape the cavern's ceiling with its horns, two long twisted lengths of metal that sprung from the sides of its head and spiraled backwards. The vaguely human head gave way to a series of corded muscles that outlined what could possibly be seen as the chest of a tiger, with each heavy upper limb ending in wicked claws that came to sharp hooks. Its knees were jointed in the manner of a bird, with the actual bone placed in the back of the leg, bending inversely to that of a human.

Around it upper and lower torso was a ragged garment made of some sort of skin - what kind, Kurenai had no wish to know - and was liberally stained with what seemed to be viscous black blood, none of it belonging to the blue demon.

"Scatter!" Letting her instincts take over, she took her teammate's advice and dived for cover behind a large chunk of rubble.

Just as she cleared the edge of the rock barrier, the demon belched a stream of bright blue flame that splashed on the glossy floor and ran like water. Intense heat washed over all three ninjas, turning the once cool and moist air into an environment like that of the inside of an oven.

Kurenai waited for the flames to subside, then dashed out of her cover and sprinted towards the rest of her team. She collapsed next to Kabuto's prone body, and hunched down on her knees, resting her back against the stone slab they were all hiding behind.

"What ... the hell ... is going on?" Her voice was raspy from the sudden change in humidity coupled with the madcap dash to safety.

Kabuto shook his head and gestured at Naruto, who crawled closer and talked softly. "It's some kind of demon. The pedestal was keyed to a stationary summoning array, but something went wrong."

He shuffled and sat back on his haunches. "The seal work doesn't really match with anything I've seen before, but there are patches that are much more modern. As far as I can tell, it's supposed to call something with a chakra level closest to the sum of the things that triggered the seal from a predesignated area. Using four distinct chakra signatures would activate a failsafe that would cancel the summon and unlock something. Since I don't think Kiri happens to have a stockpile of demons lying around, I'd say that certain non standard aspects to the sum of our group's chakra combined with fluctuations in the net input as a result of the destabilization of my clone due to the drain on its core accidently ended up bypassing the recent modifications to the array and funneled all of the energy into the seal's original purpose, which brings us to - this."

"..."

Both Kabuto and Kurenai just looked at Naruto, who started to fidget under their gaze.

"What?"

Kurenai sat up and cocked an eyebrow at the blond. "First of all, do us a favor and tell us something we can actually use. Second, why the hell do you even know all that in the first place?"

Naruto rubbed the back of his head and smiled sheepishly. "I'm good with seals?"

_Whooosh...crackle...hisss._

The second wave of azure flames rolled over the floor and began to warp the surface of the stone. The three ninja jerked away from their shelter as the slab became uncomfortably warm, and the other two quickly looked to Naruto for ideas, since he was the only person who seemed to have any idea of what was going on.

"Why're you all looking at me? What, you think I go fighting demons in my spare time or something? I'm just as surprised as the both of you!"

Alright, maybe no one knew what was going on.

* * *

So, I'm staring down a building sized demon with teammates of dubious skill while trapped underground in a stone cavern. Have to say, it's not the worst situation I've ended up in, but as things go, it is rather unique.

First off, demons simply don't exist.

Oh, there's always philosophical debate over the nature of the nine bijuu, but speaking from the perspective of someone who's lived with one sealed in their stomach for almost two centuries, I can definitely say they are not demonic. Fragments of a massively powerful being, yes. Actual demons, no.

If I didn't get the message before, this is a pretty good way of reminding me that the things I used to know aren't always true in this new world.

Still, it has a head and a pretty solid looking body, so whatever this things is, it can be killed. Afterall, chopping off the head and then torching both pieces of the body tends to kill pretty much anything.

"Guys, listen to me for a second. I have a plan."

Now, really, I have no idea why the two of them turned to me with such odd looks on their faces. Hell, it's as if they were just as terrified of what I suggested as they were of the things in front of us.

Nah - must have been a trick of the light.

* * *

Kurenai hefted the thick notebook her teammate had giver her and resisted the urge to tear it to shreds, or throw it away and run as fast as she could. Just being near it had her breaking out in a cold sweat; it was a natural reaction, considering that each page of the palm sized book was an explosive tag, just waiting to be torn out and activated. As a rough estimate, she calculated that there was enough firepower in her hands to fill the entire cave with one massive explosion, and all it was waiting for was a single stray spark.

Really, it was kind of sad that she had the safest job of the three.

Kabuto was dancing around the beast's feet, lashing out with hands coated in a flickering blue aura. Each blow sliced through the thick fur coat and into the muscle below, carving bloody swathes into the back of the demon's ankles. Each individual wound was practically unnoticeable, but the combined effect was beginning to build up as his arms blurred, spraying a noxious black fluid in all directions.

While injuries on this scale were akin to the bites of an insect, it would have dealt with Kabuto within minutes if it wasn't for the biggest distraction around. Naruto was leaping from limb to limb on the giant creature, a dozen of his water clones accompanying him as they all smashed their meteor hammers into the thick blue hide.

As the beast furiously swiped at the numerous blonds and dispelled the clones one by one, the real Naruto produced another copy for every one that was destroyed. While the three ninja were technically holding their own, it was only a matter of time before they ran out of energy and were summarily obliterated.

Two of the clones separated from the pack and launched themselves higher, running along the hairy arms until they reached the hollows by the base of the neck. Each was wielding a brass spike that the original had unsealed from his little bag of tricks, and they simultaneously stabbed the points into the demon's skin, burying them up to the base.

During this time, Kurenai had ripped out seal after seal and was attaching them to every kind of projectile she had available - kunai, shuriken, senbon, even small rocks. She kept an eye on the fight raging around her, but though she felt uncomfortable letting her team risk their lives so directly, she knew that in a situation like this she was nothing more than a liability on the battlefield. Her illusions were practically useless on the beat, requiring more chakra to hold for even a minute than she could spare without dropping from sheer exhaustion, and unlike her teammates, her repertoire of techniques ran more to the supportive side than sheer damage.

She should probably look into picking up at least one heavy duty trump card in the near future, assuming they survived this mess, of course.

The moment she saw the clones finish their job and then rejoin the fray, she grabbed every prepared weapon she had and threw them in the general direction of the beast, not taking much care about her aim. Each tag was brushed with a light touch of chakra as she released it, activating the dual purpose seal and beginning to glow a brilliant white, but she was more concerned with getting all of the tags away from her as fast as possible than she was with the light show.

Though the tagged projectiles were poorly aimed and spread out over a wide area, as they approached the demon, their flight paths began to converge as the first seal on the tag dragged its payload to the activate seals on the top of the brass spikes.

Like magnets, the seals pulled to each other, drawing all of the flying metal and rock towards the beast's neck, where they clumped into a ball and began to emit a series of pulses from the second seal on the tags.

_BOOOOOM!_

* * *

Homing explosive tags - extremely useful when you need to mass widespread attacks onto a single point. While the original purpose behind their development was to breach the thick walls of a fortress, I guess this is close enough.

Of course, based on the size of of the combined explosions versus the bulk of the beast coupled with it's high constitution, I doubt that it's finished.

Right on cue, the smoke from the twin blasts is cleared by a furious swipe of the demon's clawed hands. There's a smattering of scorch marks spread across it's upper chest, and ichor drips from several patches of ruined flesh, acrid smoke still issuing from the burning meat.

Right, well, that didn't work. Kurenai calls up to me as she dashes to shelter behind a different slab of stone.

"Tell me that was part of your plan!"

Well, no. It wasn't. I could lie and try to assuage her fears, but she's a ninja. She can take it.

"Nope. I got nothing!"

If looks could kill, I'd be a pile of ash on the ground. As it is, it's taking everything I have to stop from being roasted by the demon's breath. I jump from side to side on the great furry body, spawning series of clones that shield me from death.

"Kabuto, how's it going down there?" As the grey haired ninja looks up, I twist my body into a backwards arch to dodge the razor sharp edge of a claw, substituting with a water clone when the other digits sweep past.

Without pausing from his gruesome task, he replies, arms sending a spray of blood over the already slick floor. "It will take longer than I thought - the amount of fur, skin, and fat that is covering the tendon forms a barrier considerably thicker than the length of my arms."

Shit. There goes that idea.

I gather my chakra, letting it accumulate until a faint blue aura can be seen around me. With an inarticulate roar, I create hundreds of water clones, all with only one thought in mind - mayhem.

An uncountable mass of human bodies, darting about unpredictably, covers my retreat from the battle. It takes but a second to alert my team to the change in plans, and we regroup at Kurenai's current shelter.

Kabuto is absolutely drenched in the black blood, to the point where his features are nearly masked by the drying layers. Kurenai's not much better, dripping with sweat from the intense heat of the flames.

If I were just a little bit older, and the situation wasn't quite as serious, I probably would be paying a good deal more attention to that. Hell, even if the situation was worse, I'd still take a peek.

Kabuto is short of breath, but struggling not to show it. "What now?"

"I don't think any of us have something that can really hurt this creature; we need to find a way out." Kurenai speaks up, and for the most part, she's right. Unfortunately -

"Two problems with that. One, there's pretty much no time left - my clones won't last much longer. Two, I already checked. The only exit is completely sealed."

"Fine! So what do you suggest we do? Roll over and die?"

I sigh. I really didn't want to use this, but I can't think of anything else I can do that would get all three of us out of here alive.

"Get to the back of the cave, and stay as close to the wall as you can. Anchor yourself to something and whatever you do, don't let go."

Her head snaps around, her face incredulous. "What -"

"Just GO!"

They turn and run, Kabuto dragging her with him when she tries to turn back. Another blast of fire vaporises nearly half the surviving clones, leaving me with barely a double handful.

"Damn it. I really, really, don't want to use this."

I sit on the stone floor, crossing my legs in a loose meditative pose. My breathing evens out, and the sounds of battle raging through the cavern dull, fading until the only noise is the steady thump of my heart. Soon even that ceases, and I close my eyes, letting blackness roll over me.

* * *

"What is that idiot doing? He's going to get himself killed!"

Kabuto ignored the ranting of his temporary teammate, instead focusing on planting kunai deep into the ground to serve as foot and handholds. He wasn't worried about his master's fate - if he said he could do something, than he could. On the chance that he couldn't then all three of them were dead anyways.

When the air in the cave began to flow erratically, as if it was being twisted, he knew that it was starting. Without another word, both members of the team threw themselves flat against the ground and grasped the metal handles jutting out of the stone.

* * *

There was a low rumble, followed by a keening screech as the roiling winds began to converge upon a central point. A short blond figure, covered in a seething coat of brilliant blue energy, stood from his seat and reached to the heavens. Thick columns of air began to spin in a tight circle around his body, eventually obscuring his image entirely. As the whirling mass elongated, each end split in two, separating and forming rough approximations of human limbs.

Within seconds, the body gained definition until it resembled a knight in heavy plate armor. It stood just a few feet shorter than the demon in front of it, and in its arms it bore a massive sword and shield. A few additional shimmers almost manifested, but with a final twist of the air, the knight stood fully manifested, looking as solid as the black rock of the cavern walls.

With a bestial bellow, Belial rushed towards his new foe, arms outstretched and belching white hot flames. The massive construct crouched down behind his shield, letting the tongues of fire wash over it like waves against a mountain. With a speed like that of the wind which gave it form, the armored figure launched forward, ramming the flat surface of its shield into the torso of the beast before it.

_Boooom...crack!_

The thunderous impact hurled the demon into the stone behind it, shattering the wall and cratering the entire face of the cave.

_Clang!_

The knight straightened from its crouch, lowering its shield and slamming the tip of its sword a good twenty feet into the stone by its feet. With a voice like the howling of a winter storm, it spoke, shaking loose boulders and dust from the ceiling above.

"**Know your place, foul beast. Accept your death, for -"**

"**I. Am. FUUJIN!"**

* * *

A/N: Sorry about the huge delay in updating. First there was high school graduation, and then I found out that I broke my back ... no, really. My partner still finds it kinda hilarious. Anyways, I'm on the road to recovery, and since I'm young and still kinda bouncy, I'll make a full recovery. Until then, updates may be kinda slower - the stuff that comes out when the meds I'm on kick in is kinda ... odd, and otherwise my back hurts. A lot.

Anyways, enough about me, tell us what you though of the chapter!


	28. Doors are Locked for a Reason

There comes a moment in every ninja's life where they know something has just gone catastrophically wrong. Nine times out of ten, it's the result of a jutsu failure. If they're lucky, they live to tell about it, and go on to document the mistake. What usually happens is that everything in the nearby vicinity explodes.

My prized technique, Fuujin is the absolute pinnacle of wind mastery. More than straight chakra control, it requires an understanding of the air that transcends normal human capabilities. While seemingly complex, at its heart it is exceedingly simple - the user exerts their dominance over every molecule that makes up the air in the vicinity.

Whatever this wind knight is, it is not Fuujin.

Within seconds of my meditation, I knew I had made a mistake. The being in front of me, Belial, is not of this world. It is not a summon, pulled from another plane of existence overlaying our own, but instead something fundamentally alien in origin. Its presence was warping the energy around it, and when I called on the winds to answer me, something else snuck through the twisting of the world.

Whatever this being is, it had completely hijacked my technique and bastardized it. Struggle as I might, I had no say in what my chakra was being used for. All I could do was sit back and hold on.

* * *

Kurenai watched in abject shock as her teammate transformed into a towering knight made of solid wind and proceeded to enter combat with a demon. If she didn't know better, she would have assumed that her friend had slipped a hallucinogenic into her food again, but the cataclysmic clash before her was a little bit too crazy, even for her own well developed creativity.

She and Kabuto were just barely managing to hold onto their anchors, but as the titanic battle raged on, the likelihood of flying debris crushing them rose steadily.

With an effort, she turned to the boy next to her and asked a question, shouting over the wind to make herself heard. "How the hell is he doing this?"

Without glancing back at her, Kabuto shouted back. "I do not think it is actually Naruto that is responsible. Look closely!"

Taking his advice, she turned back to the fight just in time to see the glowing knight sever the demon's left arm with a thunderous, two handed swing. As the beat roared in pain, the knight plunged its blade through a blue furred foot and into the rock below. As Belial stumbled from the sudden pinning, the titan of wind scooped up its discarded shield, bringing the thick edge into its opponent's lower jaw.

The demon roared.

Shockwaves hammered into Fuujin, throwing it to its back. As it rolled back to its feet, Kurenai saw what Kabuto meant. Trapped inside the raging maelstrom that comprised the knight's body, her blond teammate was violently struggling, thrashing about in an effort to escape.

* * *

As much as I loathe the entity that dared to violate my personal technique, I have to acknowledge both its efficiency and brutality. With precise movements it slowly kills the demon before it, moving inexorably towards its final goal. Though Belial puts up a tremendous effort, its movements are beginning to slow.

All it takes is a single mistake - lacking an arm and with both legs severely wounded, the demon lunges forward and fastens its jaws in the knight's upper thigh, almost cutting straight through the leg entirely. Without a second's pause, the knight reversed its grip on the giant sword and stabbed down, carving into its own leg and splitting the demon's skull in twain.

In a sense, it's almost anticlimactic. The slain demon falls apart in a spray of glowing red particles that vanished upon contact with any surface. The knight lasted for a few moments longer, before dispersing in a gentle swirl of wind that deposited me on the ruined stone floor below.

The resulting silence is deafening, as the three of us merely look around us at the ruined cavern. There are no traces of what caused the damage, just gouges thicker than a man is tall, and patches of melted rock that seemed to have flown like water.

In the center of all this damage is the small altar that started this whole fiasco, seemingly undamaged save for a jagged split that bisected the carved stone. Spilling out from within were dozens of numbered tags, whose clearly man-made nature jarrs fiercely with the otherworldly nature of our surroundings.

Hesitantly, we all walk over and pick up a tag. I think I saw Kabuto take a few extra, but honestly, I'm just too tired to care right now. With shared glances, we agree that what happened in the cave most definitely did not ever actually happen, regardless of whatever anyone else said to the contrary.

* * *

In the depths of the desert of the Land of Wind, far beyond the oasis studded regions that bore life, a solid black obelisk rose from the scorching sand, rising until it cast a shadow nearly half a mile long.

A tree in the thick forests of the Land of Fire grew until it towered over everything in sight.

A mountain belched fire that burned through rock.

A whirlpool the size of a small city disrupted a major shipping route.

All throughout the world, shrines to beings old and new gained power that had been lost to them for millennia.

The Age of Ninja draws to a close.

The Age of Gods is once more at hand.

* * *

A/N: So, it's been a while and this is what we give you - one of the shortest chapters yet. Right, before you decide to hunt us down and burn us alive, we have excuses! I broke my back, and so was recovering, and we were both getting ready for college.

Also, this was typed on a phone, so cut me some slack. So, the second stage of the Chunin exams has been more or less concluded, and the law of unintended consequences just eloped with murphy's laws.

This one might be short, but we promise, it should get good soon.

As a final note, we haven't really been answering reviews lately (see above [half-assed] excuses why), but we do promise to do better!


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